I tried
by JaelSarjenka
Summary: (Takes place in New Moon after Bella and Jake have gone to the movies with Mike.) Edward had left me and now, things are changing with Jake too. I have to prove to myself that I could be strong enough to be alone, that I attempted to keep myself together. I want to be able to say, "I tried."
1. Chapter 1

_**Chapter 1:Distracted**_

 _ **Disclaimer:I am not Stephenie Meyer, but I enjoy her books and have no intention of making money by writing a story based on her characters.**_

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BPOV

The alarm startled me awake. I was surprised, because I had been thoroughly immersed in my dream. In it I had gone to the movies with Jake and made fun of the horribly unrealistic effects, which was sort of what had actually happened. In reality, after we left the movie early due to Mike's upset stomach, we had had a serious conversation about how I'm not quite ready for a relationship. In this dream, however, HE was there, as a phantasm, encouraging me to move on and try to be happy -for HIS sake. HE couldn't be happy if I wasn't. It was very vivid and I disliked its ending. The mood it left was like a strange aftertaste that wouldn't go away.

Crazy subconscious! I wondered what it meant. I clutched my well worn quilt tightly as I thought. Could I ever truly let HIM go? I doubted it. It all felt so wrong without HIM. But HE said that HE didn't want me and I had to go on without HIM. I was left with no choice in the matter.

I decided to get on with my morning so I could check on Jake. He seemed like he was getting sick when he dropped me off. I hoped he wasn't getting what Mike had. Mike couldn't enjoy the movie we were watching for running to the restroom. He didn't say, but from the sickly smells he was emitting, I'd guess it was from both ends. No one wants that. I should probably check on him too, I thought.

I got dressed, brushed my tresses, whipped my hair into a bun, and scurried down the stairs to call Jake before I started my breakfast. Billy answered in a quiet voice and said that Jake was sick and I should avoid the house for a while. He sounded extremely distracted and that worried me, but he assured me that he and his friends on the Rez could handle things.

I made a list of things to do after breakfast and put calling Mike's mom on the top of the list. He was still quite sick, she told me. I offered to run errands for her or fill in at the store, but she also had things covered. It seemed like I had the day to myself. I dropped the yellow pencil in the drawer and put the "to do" pad in with it after carefully ripping off the list I had made. There's just something about crossing off things from a list that's satisfying.

I started laundry and swept and mopped. I finished my homework, then I made a turkey sandwich. I looked down at the crumbs on my plate as an uncomfortable feeling waved through my entire digestive track. It was the distinct feeling of the entire tract twisting from top to bottom. "Ugh! Now I've got it too," I said to myself. "I really hate being sick."

I spent the rest of the weekend in the bathroom. I even made a bed of towels on the floor for part of the time. Charlie checked on me regularly, but kept leaving for the convenience store down the street and around the corner, since we only had the one bathroom. He made sure I had something to drink every hour or so.

It seemed to let up by Sunday evening. I woke up to find that Charlie had carried me to my bed. I slowly sat up and I felt much better. It must have been a 24-hour bug. I thought I'd be able to go to school the next morning. I was still wearing the same jeans and tee-shirt from Saturday morning that I had been cleaning in so I got cleaned up and changed into pajamas and threw on a robe to go downstairs.

I called to check on Jake but Billy said he was still too sick. Not the flu. Possibly mono. He'd have to rest a while and have no visitors. He asked me not to call for a few days to keep the house quiet. I asked if I could run any errands for him, but he said Harry and Sue Clearwater were dropping off supplies for them. I was glad they were being cared for, but I wanted something to do to help.

I lamented to myself, "A whole week without my best friend! A whole week to stew over that dream!" I wasn't pleased with that. Spending time with Jacob helped me keep from thinking too much about HIM and how much I missed THEM.

I shouldn't be so selfish.

Life continued as normal minus the time I would have spent with Jake. That means that I moped when I wasn't doing homework or cleaning. I stared off into nowhere, slightly dazed, often.

School was particularly hard. Mike wouldn't let up with the questions and comments. He wondered about the kind of company I kept. He pondered aloud at lunch, one day, about what my type was comparing and contrasting Jake and HIM. He seemed to be oblivious to my discomfort. But then again, maybe he didn't really care. He was probably too jealous to do so. He had seemed hurt that I hadn't held his offered hand at the theatre, but I didn't take Jake's either. I wouldn't be ready for that for a while. Why would I want to hurt either of them by leading them on by dating when I'm not sure about how to care for anyone else?

Broken. That's all I was.

Angela and Ben could see my distress. By the time Jessica started adding her two cents, they started asking about stories from hikers in the woods. I zoned out. I hadn't been to work in a few days and so had nothing to add. Honestly, I probably had been too much in a haze to notice the hikers' stories. I wasn't really at work anymore than my mind was here in the cafeteria with my friends. Distraction carried me far from the table where I was seated. I just kept thinking about the two young men who had said they loved me.

At home, Charlie watched me surreptitiously, worried that zombie mode might return. I thought I was doing well with that until I overheard Charlie arguing with Billy on the phone on Friday. Apparently, he had seen Jake with some other kids at a shop in La Push that afternoon. They were arguing about what kind of relationship we were having and Charlie was worried what would happen if I found out one of those friends was Leah Clearwater. Billy seemed to assure him that I had been very clear about my intentions and Jake was free to befriend anyone he so desired. His side of the conversation was loud enough for me to hear as I put away supper dishes, though Charlie tried to keep his voice lowered.

At first I was hurt that he hadn't called to say he was feeling better, but I was glad he was up to doing more. He had been spending a lot of time with me lately, maybe he needed to catch up with his other friends. Maybe he had been running errands and just ran into them, though. That could have happened. Maybe he had only just started feeling better, but that didn't explain why Billy was being so defensive to Charlie on the phone.

Billy has been so strange when talking to me lately too. His answered where terse and had a tinge of distaste. I wondered what was going on to make him behave so out of character. He's always been so kind to us. I know he and Charlie argue over many things, but he's always been courteous to me. Even when he was warning me about spending time with THEM. It felt like he was hiding something more.

I continued to think about all the evasiveness. There could be many reasons. I shouldn't get so worked up or worried about it. I just needed to relax and give Jacob the same courtesy of restraint and time that he said he would give me regarding waiting on pushing forward with any kind of relationship with me.

The words of their conversation kept going over and over in my mind. It almost didn't make sense that Charlie was being confrontational about it. Something was bringing out the over-protective dad out of him. I was missing something from what they were saying. Then I realized how obvious it was.

"Leah?" I thought. "Jake and Leah?" It made my stomach hurt. I had spent all week convincing myself not to mope because Jake would wait for me until I healed -even though I told him I wasn't worth it. I guess I believed him when he argued that I was worth waiting for. Well, is that how a guy waits? With another girl? Stupid hope! Why was I even hoping? Why couldn't I make up my mind? Was there a point to hope?

So much for me not being a normal teen aged girl. Renee had be wrong. This had to prove that something about me was tapped into the universal teen drama line.

I started to reel from remembering my last conversation with HIM. I thought, maybe HE wasn't referring to vampires when HE talked about HIS kind being easily distracted. Maybe HE meant males. Maybe all males are so easily tossed about with desire. How would I ever make it in this world, human or otherwise? With that thought my stomach dropped, the world spun, and then it all went black.

A/N

This is my first fanfic. I have been reading many on this site and other fanfic sites as well. I wanted to just try one, so I guess that's part of the theme, _**I Tried**_ being the title. I have found trying to stick to cannon harder than I thought it would be. I guess it's easier to color outside the lines. Another extension of that theme is I tried writing this as a partial Jacob/Bella fic, but I just couldn't do it. Bella is too committed to Edward in my mind. I just couldn't do it. I don't have this completed yet, but I'm getting further along.

Also, please note that for a few chapters Edward and the Cullens won't be referred to by name in keeping with the writing of New Moon.

Thanks,

JaelSarjenka


	2. Chapter 2 Distractions

**Remember that last time we found out that Jacob was out and about, but avoiding Bella. She passes out from being an emotionally stressed out teen hearing that he was not just with friends but with female friends.

Chapter 2 Hobbies

My head ached as I woke up on the couch in the living room with Charlie and Dr Gerandy talking in hushed tones behind me. Charlie seemed to be explaining that he thought I overheard his conversation with Billy. Dr. Gerandy suggested that the world would be better off if the sexes were segregated through the teen years. He'd observed too much damage done through adolescent relationships gone wrong. Charlie laughed and said said that he'd look into an all-girl boarding school.

Dr Gerandy strongly advised that he talk me out of working at Newtons. Mike had a bad reputation around town. He didn't think I needed to be near him. Charlie told him that he had called and told them I should be off work for a week or so before I come back until they figured out what was going on with me. Dr Gerandy nodded in agreement that that had been a good idea.

I cleared my throat. They seemed pleased that I had regained conciousness.

Dr Gerandy asked me questions, checked my vitals, and looked into my eyes. He told me to stay in until Monday and to find something soothing to do. He left me with a list of hobbies to try. Ok, so it was more of a brochure on adolescent anxiety and relationships, but it ended with a list of low anxiety activities that were to help one relax when things got to be too much. Hobbies.

Therapy had also been briefly discussed before he left. How does one discuss what I need to discuss in therapy without ending up in the psych ward of a hospital?

Charlie suddenly got a strange look on his face and said he remembered he had something to do, excusing himself out of the door. I scratched my head and looked over the hobby list. Writing Fanfiction looked interesting. I could do that. I had many books I thought could end differently or could be continued. I went up stairs and grabbed a notebook to brainstorm books and ideas I might work on.

I heard Charlie return and enter the house. He was coming up the stairs lightly calling my name like he wasn't sure how loudly he should call. He didn't wish to scare me, stress me, or whatever.

C"I'm in my room." I answered with gusto. I wanted him to hear strength in my voice. I put my pencil and paper away in my desk. I wasn't sure what he would think about my ideas. I might not have been ready to tell anyone about it.

He had a sack from the drug store and a funny smile. He held it out to me and said, "I remembered that your mom used to love to take long hot baths to relax. I thought you might, too. I don't know why I didn't think of this earlier. I overheard a couple of young ladies say how much they liked this scent. I don't know from bath salts." He waited for me to say something.

" Thanks, Dad. A nice long hot soak does sound divine. I used up my last salts months ago." I tried to hide my surprise at this level of thoughtfulness. I looked at the container that was simply labeled, "Minute Vacation in a a Tub." I smiled at the word play.

"Yeah, well, I got one more thing. I'm gonna scrub out the tub real quick so it's nice for you to soak in. Those young ladies were also saying that the only thing more they needed was a cleaning fairy to make sure their tub was clean so the soaking would work better. I've been a bachelor for so long, a little grime feels homey." He chuckled and I laughed at the last part.

"That is so thoughtful." I was feeling so loved right then. Charlie was taking care of me. How nice was that? I have always cared for both my parents. Renee being so flighty and Charlie... Well, I think we were taking a while to get used to knowing what we're doing here. He went from a few weeks in the summer type dad to a full-time dad of a teenager. It's been hard for both of us to know how this should go.

After he cleaned the tub, I gathered my things and crossed the hall. I could definitely stand a luxurious moment. I turned the hot water knob and let it fill. I brushed my hair and pulled it up into a knot on my head. I had brought my CD player in and had a CD of old radio shows to entertain me.

I opened the glass tub filled with bright yellow crystals that were supposed to "improve your day as you let the aromatherapy take your stress away with a mini vacation." I sprinkled them along the length of the center while the hot water from the faucet began to melt them. They did smell good. I didn't want to think of what it was I only needed it to to carry me away. The steamy vapors did smell quite sweet. I stepped in and enjoyed the pleasurable feeling of being wrapped in this beautiful warmth. I sank down into it and let it unwind all the pain and disappointment.

I knew it wouldn't all go down the drain, but I could set it aside. In here, it didn't seem so horrible. I wasn't just submerged in water. I was also immersed in love. My parents' love for me glowed in my mind like a beacon of true love.

For one moment I could know that my future depended on me. I made choices everyday. Yes, this moving forward was going to take a while, but I was going to do it. Would the past be an interloper in my thoughts to distract me from daily living? As a teenager that would be likely, but I had a compass that would help. Love.

While I sat there, I decided a strange thing. I was going to actually read Dracula by Brom Stoker. It couldn't be worse than reading Job when you're depressed, could it? I've never read it before. I've heard discussions on how different it is from movies made from it. Someone once even said that it probably would have been looked over had it been written now. It ends so easily. There wasn't enough carnage. I'd soon find out for myself.

I finished my bath and looking at the clock decided that the library should still be open. I put on a clean pair of jeans and a burgundy tee-shirt. I brushed my still rather wet hair before descending the stairs. Charlie looked surprised to see me in fresh clothes, but really, why in the world would I leave my stinky clothes from earlier when I now smelled so nice. He asked what I was up to. When I told Charlie I planned to go check out a book or two, he insisted on accompanying me. I let him go in order to ease his worry.

During the drive to the library, I consoled myself with the memory that Leah was Jacob's cousin. Why should I be jealous of him spending time with her. It didn't make sense. Perhaps in the back of my mind I remembered that she had a group of girls that normally flanked her sides. He wasn't related to them. If she was there, they were likely there, too. I needed to remind myself of my resolutions from the bathtub. Moving on!

I had been to the library once when I first moved there and had deemed it to be ignored by the community. I put it in the back of my mind that improving the library could be a rewarding activity. It might not be relaxing to find myself in charge of organizing a fundraising campaign either. But I had time to think about that - after I read Dracula and wrote my fanfics.

When Charlie saw what book I was getting, he went to the back to check out 2 Dracula movies. He thought it might be fun if we both read the book and then watch the movies. We could make discussion of the differences.

I nearly passed out from that. Charlie was giving up sports watching time for me? Wow! Just Wow! I really needed to get better if he was that concerned for my well being. Renee said he didn't miss any when I was born. He had the TV on in the delivery room. She let him distract himself that way. Apparently he complained he might pass out from seeing blood. Hmmm...

A/N: Ok. So things are a changing. These first couple of establishing chapters are moving slowly, but stick with it because I've got some interesting thoughts about other characters in the works. We just have to establish our bases before we get there.

BTW: Anybody else need a cleaning fairy?

Thanks!

JaelSarjenka


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 Of Vampires and Wolves

I stayed up all night reading the letters about vampires that make up Bram Stoker's Dracula. It would by considered slower moving by today's standards. Knowing what I know of real vampires, there's no way I could see the group of human men slaying an elder vampire, especially if he were as gifted as they thought he was. I remembered what HE had told me about the stories making people less scared. I wondered what precipitated the writing of the novel. Were there so many unexplained deaths? Probably that is more likely.

Imagine how surprised I was to read the description of the vampires that were inhumanly beautiful and fast, smelled honey sweet, and had tinkling sounding voices, and most surprisingly did not all have red eyes (strangely blue not golden...) - from Bram Stoker! (Check out chapter 3.)

How had that not made it into the movies? How was that not in that website I read last year? I doubt many have actually read that book, favoring the movies. Or if they had, they missed those traits. Traits that were way too real.

I pondered the workers below the castle, on the outer grounds. Was it too far fetched to think they were the wolves Dracula called on? Werewolves even? Why was I thinking about werewolves now?

I started to think it was a bad idea to dwell on vampire stories, but I was sure it was a type of therapy, too. I could talk to Charlie about vampires with out putting him into any more danger or making him think I was crazy enough to be put in an institution. I just had to choose my words carefully and be sure he didn't think I was taking it too seriously.

Another coincidence that made its way through my subconscious as I had an old nightmare revisit me in the night as I had slept. It was from my first reconnection with Jake at First Beach when I went there with my school friends. After he revealed the legends about the Quileutes and the cold ones. In the dream, HE was a vampire with pointy teeth and Jake turned into a wolf to fight HIM. I was more worried about HIM than Jake, of course, because I love HIM. I guessed it was reading Dracula that spurred the dream on.

I woke up panting. Dracula was friendly with the wolves in the book. He had called them creatures of the night. But Jake said the La Push wolves were protectors from vampires.

My intuition flickered and I knew the reason why Jake hadn't been around. The myths were true. He had joined their ranks. He was a wolf protector, just like in my dream. I wondered if there was a way to figure it out. I doubted he would come out and tell me, "Hey, Bells, I can't come by tonight 'cause I'm running around all covered in fur. I think people might notice, and if you remember, I told you we weren't supposed to tell any outsiders."

Why is it that the problem I have with that imaginary statement is that fake Jake called me an 'outsider?' Shouldn't I be more concerned with the hairy wolf part?

A wolf. But why? Were there more vampires in the area that I should avoid or be worrying about? Other supernatural beings that I don't want to know truly exist in this world? What is going on in this area that worlds of legends converge to stay on the periphery of the simple mortal world? I had so many questions overwhelming my thought processes.

I could feel a breakdown coming. I had to leave. I got dressed and ran down the stairs. I ran to my truck with Charlie yelling for me to stop. I screamed that I'd be back after I did something to help me relax. He yelled something about bear attacks and warned me to be careful. I really didn't hear him. I took off for the meadow. I needed to think and lay in the grass. I needed to see the one place where I could center myself in this maelstrom of thought. The place where I could feel HIM best in memory.

I unerringly made my way to the meadow that I couldn't find on my own before, driven by the panic welling up inside me. But I was too overwhelmed with the present to really soak in its magic, thinking of all I had realized. It was looking barren, since it was before the fullness of spring could beautify it to its normal glory. There were a few buds trying to emerge from a few branches, but everything else was still dormant from the cold.

I let the stillness and emptiness calm me for a minute, but I couldn't keep from it. I thought about my love and my friend. Two who had sworn to love me. Two that were leaving me as wasted as winter had left this meadow. Did I have enough within me to evoke a new growth inside me? I hadn't confirmed my hypothesis about Jacob, but I just knew. What would be the culmination of their attention and then sudden inattention to me?

I fell to my knees as I realized I couldn't be part of either of their lives. The supernatural had shortchanged me and stolen my friends and the future I had desired for myself -my forever with my Edward. I couldn't keep HIS name out any longer. I whispered aloud, "I love you, Edward, no matter what has happened or what will happen." I stayed on my knees in the wet ground. I shivered, not just because I was cold. I felt things were changing in the air.

I heard a twig snap to my left and then another indistinct to my right and then I froze. There were long dark haired Laurent and beautiful fiery red-headed Victoria. They were both sparkling lightly as sun gently broke through the dark clouds, but blood was caked in her wild hair and covered her face and clothes as if she had rubbed herself in... I didn't want to continue the speculation. The horrifying sight truly marred my thoughts on beauty. A light growl began to fill the circle between us.

Laurent moved to stand between Victoria's hate filled glare and my fear filled face. I was still paralyzed in fear. There's no way I could have run away anyway. They were much much faster and better coordinated than I was.

"Ladies. Let's take a moment to talk. Bella, I think that Victoria here has some feelings she'd like to air before..." Laurant calmly spoke as if he didn't know what was behind the muderous eyes that Victoria held in my direction. But she interrupted him with deeper, more fierce growling.

"Certainly, I have something to say, 'Good-bye, Bella.'" Then she lunged at me and I knew death had come for me again. Danger magnet? No. Death magnet! My thoughts quickly moved to Edward. He would be my last contemplation. My last meditation. It was almost if he were with me for the briefest frightful moment.

It was déjà vu as I felt a hard body hit me from the wrong direction and I flew against my will, limbs flailing about ridiculously. My face was in the mud before I could react appropriately -if there could be such a thing. I could hear growling erupt all around me. I scraped the mud from my vision to see huge wolves all around. I couldn't even count because I was so overcome. Death had been averted one more time. The Protectors had come.

One had made its stance right beside me. He elicited the memory of the Jacob wolf from my dream but was bigger than a horse. Then, as 1 plus 1 equals 2, I put it all together in my head and simply whispered, "Jake."

The huge russet wolf jerked his head toward me in surprise. His eyes bore deeply into me. It was him. He knew I recognized him. The others seem to ignore this for the time being. Surely they heard me, too.

I kept my eyes on him not wanting to see the source of the screeching sharp sounds that filled the air. Sounds that amazed me because I had heard them once before. "How could this be?" My disbelief danced in my memory trying to recollect if I knew of anything other than another vampire being able to disassemble a vampire. "Few things" echoed in my imperfect mind. Only a few things. I didn't recollect any elaboration on those things being given to me. He held my gaze as the others fought. It was likely the best way to protect me at the time. I didn't move, I just stared back at him in awe and gratefulness.

Sweet purple smoke filled the air and I relaxed. All was still. Jacob the wolf started for the forest and my eyes followed him into the thicket where he disappeared. "Why is he leaving me after I saw that?" I wondered. I continued to be still. Then he re-emerged wearing only some cut-off shorts. He ran to me and gathered me into his arms.

"Geez! Bella!" He held me tightly as he berated me. "Didn't Charlie tell you to stay out of the woods?"

"No. I don't think so. He told me to be careful, but I didn't tell him where I was going." I drank in the warmth of his embrace. I was vibrating and I wondered if I were going into shock. Jacob and his friends weren't quite as comforting to me as Edward had been. Actually a couple of them had begun to glare angrily at me. I was sure they didn't like me knowing their secrets.

"Haven't you heard the stories about people dying in the woods." He was still shaking. I think I had stopped, but maybe not.

It was all vague in my head. My psyche was being held tenuously. Magic had invaded reality while myths and legends ran rampant all around me. Could I keep really it together? It was up to me. I could only depend on myself. I was thankful for my saviors that had been spun across my plane of existence, but could I count on them keep showing up when I needed them?

He was still going on about all the "maulings" that had I heard of them, yes, I would have known. I would have known Victoria was after me. I imagined how hard it would have been to keep it together with all that had poised to destroy my sanity.

I guessed that everyone around me had seen my fragile state and had steered clear of such stories. Certainly, Charlie wouldn't have said anything. He was being way too protective and thoughtful right now. Now that I thought of it, he had stopped bringing the paper back from work. I hadn't seen one in a few weeks.

So many people had died in Victoria's vengeful state. She had been utterly cruel and stupidly careless. She meant for me to hear and to know she was coming for me.

I looked up into Jacob's eyes as terror gripped me more deeply. I rasped out "She was after me all this time, but Charlie was in danger. She could had killed him, too." I didn't wonder why she hadn't. It didn't matter that the purple haze around us meant that the threat was over. The realization that my dad, my rock, my tether to reality, had been in the line of fire, because of me. My knees buckled and it all disappeared.


	4. Chapter 4

_Thanks to all of you who have reviewed. I'm tickled pink that people are actually reading this and am just about to burst that you took time to say something nice. Thanks!_

 _sarah88 and a guest reviewer: I hope you_ _continue to enjoy this._

 _Catjumped1: I am finding that the further I get into_ _and make the story mine, the easier it is. It was very rough in the beginning._

 _Disclaimer: I will never forget that I'm making no money from Twilight because I don't own that magical sparkly world. It would be nice if anyone who gets royalties from the books or movies wanted to share. Sharing is a nice thing to do._

Chapter 4 Foresight in the Leaves

I regained conciousness as Jake was carrying me into Billy's little house. Billy had called for Sue to look after me while he, Sam, and Jake were going to Harry's house to talk.

They were curious about what was overheard being said before they stopped Victoria. Jake wanted them to let me rest before any inquiry should be made. Then he would talk to me and see what I would say about it. They were concerned that more dangerous vampires might come since the Cullen's had left.

The thought made me shiver harder. I had to calm myself. He set me on the couch and noticing my trembling, pulled an afghan from the arm on the opposite side. I pulled it tight around myself. He watched me for a few minutes. Sam cleared his throat and a Jake stood telling me he would be back soon.

Sue had brought some hot tea that was made with loose leaves. I hadn't had tea made without a bag or ball before. I sat up and clasped the warm cup with my icy hands. She gave me a motherly smile and rearranged the afghan to warm me more. I wondered if Sarah had made the afghan.

When I was finished with the cup of tea, Sue took it from my hands and then she looked into it and made a soft sigh while shaking her head. She had a change in her countenance that made me curious.

She must have seen the questions in my eyes. She collected herself and took a moment to choose her words.

"The one who left you loves you. He is your soul mate." She dropped her head and closed her eyes before opening them to meet mine again. "He will return and you will miss that he was here. There will be a misunderstanding and it will be years before you are reunited. He is uncertain of your ability love to love him because of what he is. He believes he is doing what is best for you. Your happiness is all he thinks of."

I looked at her disbelieving.

"I wouldn't lie dear. I don't even like him. I know he is a cold one, but the leaves have never spoken so clearly to me." She said gruffly and then added seriously. "I can't recommend that you find love with Jacob either - even without the leaves basically telling me that your love with your cold one is so like our imprinting." she saw my confusion. "It is rare, but imprinting is very real. It's a spiritual bond. Jacob has not imprinted on you. There may be another destined for him. He would turn his back on you for her. It would be disastrous for all of you. the pain. The guilt. The betrayal."

I looked at her without understanding. This was all too much.

"It's happened here very recently with Sam, Leah, and Emily. Sam was very much in love with Leah, but once the imprinting magic happened, he had no choice. There was only room in his heart to love Emily." She explained quietly.

I couldn't imagine why she was telling me all this.

As if she was reading my mind, she continued, "I'm telling you this, Bella, because I love you like I love my kids. I don't want to see you hurt anymore than you already do. I think that your... Friend... left you while loving you. He wants something better for you. He wants you human, because he loves you and he thinks that is best for you. If he stayed with you, he'd need to change you. From what we know of the Cullens, they are good and caring. I know not all my neighbors share that opinion but I've had time to think about things. I've watched this triangle that is Leah, Emily, and Sam. I have a different view of life and love."

She paused and then continued, "I met Esme once. I never told anyone about it, but I saw that she was a concerned mother like me who cared for those who looked to her the way children do. We are very similar. I saw love. Love is basic. I don't believe monsters can love. Esme Cullen is no monster."

I marveled at the idea that I could be here with Sue and have her say these things, but I didn't know what to say.

"I do love Edward with my entire being. I love them, as my family. I miss them all. I don't know what to do." I confessed.

She advised, "Be happy, Bella. I am sure one day love will bring you back to them, but don't expect it any time soon. In the meantime, go on with your life and live. Don't waste your life. You are a strong young woman. Things will change. You must prepare yourself for what this choice means. Spend time with your mortal friends and family, because after you are changed, you will have to sever ties with them for their safety. See this opportunity as a gift. Don't lose yourself in grief and young stupidity."

We moved from the tiny kitchen table and moved to the couch. She sat close to me and held me like she would Seth or Leah. It was comforting. Renee never was this maternal. If she were here, she'd comfort me like a friend, but she wouldn't nearly cradle me like Sue was at this moment. I relaxed to enjoy the sweetness of the moment and the healing of a gentle hug.

I confided in her that I had had an epiphany of true love. That my parents' care for me was an anchor in this stormy period of my life. She told me that was a good understanding and that I should hold on to that tightly.

After thinking about what she said about imprinting, I told her that the vampires referred to me as Edward's mate, even though we hadn't quite gotten too far in our relationship. She told me that the spiritual bond was stronger than the physical, but the physical would likely reinforce the spiritual once that should happen. I contemplated all she had to say.

The men returned to Billy's small home. Sam was wheeling Billy up the ramp and through the door while Jacob held the door. They all smiled at us and I thought that the council meeting must have gone well. They all seemed more relaxed and in good spirits.

They had decided to have a Bon fire on the beach and invite Charlie. No one was to mention the true reason for the celebration. Next week was Spring Break and that should be reason enough for a party.

Jacob took my hand and led me to his little garage in the back. "Charlie will be here in an hour. We can go together to beach then. We need to talk."

We passed our motorcycles that we hadn't ridden in a few weeks. I smiled as I thought about my lack of injuries. He opened the passenger side door of his '86 Rabbit and helped me sit. I was again a little shakey on my feet before I sat and he had noticed. Then he walked around to get in on the drivers side.

"I'm glad all your hard work has paid off and your baby is running." I grasped for conversation.

"Yeah. It's great! I'm really glad that goober, Mike didn't hurl in here." Jacob could easily have talked cars and motorcycles for hours, but was a horse-sized wolf in the room that needed to be discussed at the moment. He looked down and cleared his throat before beginning what we needed to get out in the air, "So, when did you figure it out?"

I laughed. "You'll never believe it."

"Try me," he countered,

I continued, "I decided to read Dracula."

He interrupted with a loud snort. "Leave it to you to decide to read Dracula after going through what you have."

I rolled my eyes and tried again, "I had to find a form of therapy. I can't exactly go to a psychologist and say, 'Hey, my vampire boyfriend left me in the woods killing my dreams of a forever with him."

Jacob choked, "Forever? As in you were going to become a rock hard stinky undead mosquito?"

My serious glare faced off his incredulity, "Yes, Jacob. He has my heart and soul. How could we be together if I remained human?"

Jacob then understood, "So, he left, because he wanted to leave you human?"

I nodded, tears starting to stream. I felt as though I would disintegrate into nothingness. He took me into a light embrace.

"Maybe he's not so bad after all."

I angrily pulled away, "It wasn't his decision to make, Jake. If I wanted to sacrifice my humanity to be able to love him completely, it was my choice to make."

"Well this gives a whole new dimension to pro-life/ pro-choice dialogue." He said with his fists clenched, "and in this case, I am very pro-life. There is nothing more valuable than your life."

I stubbornly lifted my chin, "I believe love is. And besides, I don't really see them as dead. I mean some of them are hell-bent on being death to all they encounter, I realize that. The Cullens, though, they're different. They choose to rise above the hand that's been dealt them. They've found how to keep their humanity intact and live differently from the others. It's hard for them, but they're choosing the road less travelled." I said with firm conviction.

It was Jake's turn to roll his eyes. He didn't want to argue. Instead he asked, "So, we've all been wondering, since the thing with the two leeches this after noon, about what the red headed female vamp was saying to you. What was all that about?"

I rubbed the bite scar on my arm thoughtfully and he didn't notice at first. I began to recount what really happened in Phoenix, "Last year when I was hurt and in the hospital, I didn't fall down the stairs. This crazy vampire named James wanted to hunt me. Alice and Jasper took me to hide in Phoenix. James went there too, hoping to lure me to him, but not knowing that we were, in fact, there. He was surprised that we had gone to the last place we should go. He was going through my mom's place looking for information to get me to come to him. Realizing I was there, he convinced me that he had my mother and would trade her. He would kill me and enjoy fighting off my vengeful fam-... Er...Friends."

Jacob, wide-eyed was sitting on the edge of his seat and my near "family" just about got him, but he let me continue. He must have been close to biting off his own tongue.

"He beat me up pretty badly and was about to kill me when they found us. They killed him and saved my life." I still had my hand on my wrist and he grabbed it to see.

"Who bit you?" He paled, knowing what it was.

"James did right before they got there. He couldn't resist after I started bleeding."

"How are you not a vampire now?" He was confused.

"You know how you can suck out snake venom from a bite?" He nodded that he was familiar with that. "Well, Edward sucked the venom from me. He saved me twice that day."

"So what does that have to do with the other two?"

"Victoria was his mate. Apparently vampire mates are quite connected." I had a difficult time saying this for some reason.

"So, I've heard." He looked like he understood quite well.

"And Laurent was in their coven." I finished.

"Ok, so then about the wolves...?

"You told me at the beach last year." I said quietly. "I had not believed that part since you dismissed it, but after you started avoiding me and Billy was acting all weird on the phone... Well, it didn't take me long to remember and put the puzzle pieces together. If one part of legend is true, the other might as well be, too."

He chuckled at my description of their behavior.

"How did you recognize me in my wolf form?" He wondered.

"Well, I guess I have a great imagination because once I figured you were a wolf, that's how I thought you would look." I complimented myself.

He looked at me as if I were from another planet. "This is so strange!" He exclaimed.

"You're telling me," I agreed with him.

We were quiet for a while. I broke the silence "It's nice to have someone to talk to about it."

"I'm no psychologist, but I've got good ears." He joked.

He returned his arm around me and I leaned into his embrace. I wondered where his thoughts were going, but the silence was now comfortable. We had more to talk about but I thought that spring break would give us time for that.

We heard the Chief's cruiser door slam and we went to help Billy into it. I rode in the Rabbit with Jake, who was again my friend.

The Bon fire was uneventful in a good way. I settled in as friend to these that I've missed for the past few weeks.

I had surreptitiously handed my keys to Quil and Embry who collected my truck and returned it to my house since Charlie had come straight to Billy's and noticed it wasn't there, but didn't know it wasn't at home, either. I rode home in the cruiser choosing instead of being embarrassed , to be thankful that my dad was still alive. I went home took a nice warm shower and went straight to bed.

Death sideswiped us when Harry had a heart attack before spring break was over. His doctor had warned him and encouraged him to change to a healthier lifestyle that included walking instead of sitting and fishing from the bank, eating the fish grilled instead of fried, and forcing vegetables other than potatoes down his throat. It was too late.

We all went to the funeral. Charlie and I did what we could for Sue, Leah and Seth. I joined the women from the reservation as they rotated cooking meals for them for the first month following. Charlie took Seth fishing.

I tried to do more, but they wouldn't let me clean for them. The chores kept them knowing how to go on. I thought all in all they were coping well.

Leah and I took Sue to the salon to have her hair cut short. It meant two things to her. First, it was solidarity with Leah as the first and only daughter wolf. Second, it symbolized her loss and how she, too, had to keep going. She had a new path to take. She was now considered a member of the tribal council in Harry's seat. It was her right by blood anyway.

I was surprised to find that Leah and Seth were both wolves. It made it such a bigger thing that Sue was on the council to me. I guess the horizon was broadened. If a daughter of the tribe could become a wolf, then it was certainly right for a daughter and mother of the tribe to sit on the council.

After that Jake, Leah, Seth, and I fell into a steady pace of friendship. The whole pack attended my graduation. The summer was spent secretly riding motorcycles, getting stitches, and reading books. I kept working at Newtons, even though my father was very against it after his talk with Dr Gerandy, but I promised to be on my toes around Mike. I planned to go to UW in Seattle to study Psychology in the fall.

We'd decided to make monthly trips to Seattle bookstores to buy books we wanted to read. Then we would donate them to the libraries in Forks and La Push. We got all the wolves to join in and do it. The librarians started to love us though they made the boys keep shirts in a closet to wear while they were there. Other wise, Leah and I would go together.

We all became close friends, though it was hard. Leah and I bonded over lost love and hating pink glitter hearts. You can't like pink glitter hearts if your heart has been as broken as ours. Maybe one day we will be healed and pink glitter hearts will be found all in our houses. It didn't look like that would be anytime soon.

Even Sue's prophecy didn't heal me, though it alleviated the pain some. It certainly confirmed the direction I should take. I would not mope and be emotionally frail. I would be the strongest human I could be.


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N: I am having so much fun writing this. I'm finding it to be good stress relief. Clauesme I'm glad you're enjoying reading this. Catjumped1 I'm glad you noticed how I'm trying to keep it tethered to the original. That is the challenging part, but I really want it to be connected. I think it will make my AU changes better._

 _...…...…..._

Chapter 5 My Furry Friends

Before I knew it, my nineteenth birthday rolled around. I had been coming home for the weekends while away at the university, so the weekend of my birthday was when Charlie decided to throw a party from me. He'd never done that before, so I guessed he was definitely missing me. I missed him, too. He kept everything a secret and had Sue and Leah take me out for a day of beauty at one of the beauty schools in Port Angeles.

It was a great girlie day. They kept me in the dark and I really didn't have a clue about their intentions. I thought that the pampering was a pretty good way to celebrate my birthday. I was completely oblivious until Leah steered us out to the beach. They were having another bonfire. I was very surprised.

I mentioned to Quil that there must have been 12 Bon fires that summer. He replied, "Any excuse is a good excuse to throw a big bonfire party."

We laughed together.

Sue had made 2 huge chocolate cakes. One for the wolves and one for the rest of us with leftovers going home with the wolves for a midnight snack. There wouldn't be any left come first light.

They put nineteen candles on each cake and made me blow out each set. Quil and Embry bet I'd faint after blowing out the second set of candles. Seth bet I would be fine. He was twenty dollars richer. He hugged me so tightly I couldn't breathe after I finished my slice. The pack guys were very competitive over everything. I imagined that if they could put aside differences they would make good friends with Emmett and Jasper.

Jacob had remained uncharacteristically quiet through the evening. I hadn't seen much of him earlier. He didn't seem sick, but overly pensive. I'd ask him later but was hoping he had pressing homework on his mind and nothing of supernatural worry. I was still mending and had no need of getting mixed up in mythological madness. I sat with him for a while watching the embers glow while we ate cake, until the music started.

I danced with each of the pack with the exception of those with imprints. They didn't leave each others' sides. Their devotion to each other made me jealous. I was separated from the one I love by his will.

Edward was still in my dreams and never far from my waking thoughts. Some days it was like he was sitting beside me as I went through my day or sitting with me as I watched TV. I kept Sue's prophecy under my hat and wrapped up in my heart. I wasn't looking for him any time soon. I promised myself I would live happily until it was time to see him. Until then, I would keep moving forward so that the person he would come back to would be whole-ish. I couldn't be truly whole without him, but I could manage to hold up the framework. Maybe even I could grow.

Sue was sitting close to Charlie and he had his arm around her waist. It seemed he had gotten around to telling her that he liked her for than her cooking. It looked like they were moving slowly and that was good considering where each of them have come from. My dad already had a torrid romance and Sue still loved Harry. But you can love more than one person though the love may be different.

Take Jake and me. I love him like a brother and he loves me like a teenaged girl loves her favorite boy band member. He thinks it's a great and grand love, but he's too young to understand. Not that I'm that much older, but I've experienced a love that is so deep that it can't be replaced. I do love him, but there's no comparison. It would be like comparing the flame on a match to the blazing sun while standing a mile from each.

Sometimes, I'm very aware of how attracted to me he is, but love and lust aren't the same. I could lust after him if I dwelt on that too long, I supposed. Maybe it would be a nice distraction for the wait. I just don't know if the love in my heart would allow it. I talked once to Quil whose imprint, Claire, is a little girl about dating to pass the time until she is old enough to fully apperciate the power of the magic in store for them. He doubted he could. It's like eating a tofu burger while smelling a steak grilling to perfection. You don't want to waste your appetite. Nothing else would seem marginally tempting. I thought I'd already made up my mind that love and lust must be together for me. It just seemed right for me. Others could be free to choose for themselves.

I found that I liked spending time with Quil. He was very understanding of my situation and feelings. He started calling me often when I moved to Seattle, particularly when Claire was with her family. We had many long talks.

When the night was over, Jake took me home while Charlie stayed to help Sue and Leah clean up. I wasn't surprised that Jacob had insisted on walking me into the house, but I was that had the key to our utility room that we rarely used In his hand.

He had a gigantic grin, "I have a surprise for you." He said while unlocking the door. Opening the door revealed a little sleeping snow white kitten curled up on a pet bed in the floor.

"How on earth did you talk Charlie into this?" I wondered. They knew I couldn't take him to my dorm. Charlie would have to take care of him while I was gone. Was he getting that lonely while I was gone?

Jake snickered, "I have my ways."

I picked up the little albino kitten who had awakened with our talking. He was purring at me as I stroked his soft fur.

"I must say, I'm surprised. I thought you would be more of a dog person." I looked up at him. He was petting the top of his head.

He laughed softly before responding, "I can see why you'd think that. And really, I'm not big on cats, but this little one was in the pound. I've been working on Carl's truck. He works in animal control. He told me about this one. Someone ran over his mom and his litter mates have all found homes. He was getting close to the deadline, if you know what I mean. He brought him out to the garage with him in an effort to tempt me or Sam. Sam is not a cat person." He shook his head emphatically. "I looked at him and knew you'd have a soft spot for him."

I squeezed my eyes and resisted the desire to smack him. I knew what he was getting at. The red-eyed white furred kitten would appeal to me because of my affinity for making friends with vampires. I only said, "Thank you, Jake. I think we will be great friends."

"Charlie and I put a litter box on both floors. There's one in the bathroom and one in the laundry room. I think Charlie thought he was a pretty neat cat. He was talking about getting a laser pen."

"Let's take him up to my room. I think I'd like it if he'd sleep in there with me." I led him up the stairs, still carrying the kitten.

"What are you going to name him?" He asked as we stepped into my room. I gently dropped him on my bed and looked at him. I thought he needed a vampire name, but Vlad seemed to scary. I could tell he was a good cat, so he needed a good vampire name. Carlisle was too obvious and there was no way I'd name him Edward. I thought about Emmett or Jasper and decided to put the names together. "Jammett" I announced, because Emsper would be ridiculous.

Jake looked at me incredulously, "Jammett? Is that even a real name?"

I smacked him playfully, "I can make up names with the best of them."

He tickled me and I wrapped my arms around myself protectively while giggling while he went on "I guess you can. You are very imaginative."

He pulled me into a light embrace. It was comforting and nice. He softly tangled his fingers in my hair. We sighed together, but our sighs wre different. His sigh sounded contented, while mine was concerned. I knew it was time to talk more about expectations for our future together. I needed to explain how I could never love him the way he deserved. He did deserve to be happy and fiercely loved.

I took a deep breath and stepped backwards. I sat down on my bed and patted the spot next to me to indicate that he should sit. He complied as I began.

"This seems a little too intimate for us, you know?" I looked down at my shoes. I so didn't wish to hurt him.

"It felt right to me," he disagreed huskily.

"Jacob, we've never talked about our friendship and where it can and can not go."

He looked a disgruntled as he repeated a little more loudly, "Cannot?"

I steeled myself to deliver my discourse, "Look, you know what has happened to me. You know that I am trying to live past it. You should know what I came to understand after a few months of knowing Edward. He is my completion. He is my love for my lifetime. You may think I'm too young or too human, but I'm not. Well, I might be too human, but that is the hand I was dealt to enter the world. But you must know that I can't love you like I love him. I could only shortchange you there. The devotion, the depth, the totality of my ability and capacity to love is already over taken. His essence is laced with mine. He is hidden in all my waking thoughts and fills my slumbering subconscious ones. He may have left me, but part of me is with him still. Part of him is with me, here, in my heart." I moved my hand to chest.

I could see the fire growing in his eyes.

"Your heart beats because he left. You are the one who told me he wants something better than an undead life for you. Can't you see he's giving you a chance to have a human life where you can love someone else and maybe even have children. He could never give you that." His words were charged with conviction.

"You can't give them to me either, Jake. No one can." I confessed sadly.

"What do you mean?" He looked a little panicked.

"I can't have children. When I was younger I had horribly infected ovarian cysts that ruptured dramatically and leaving me infertile." A melancholy settled about me as I shared this. I wondered if I should have told Edward. Would it have made a difference? Then I remembered the argument we had after my dreadful birthday party and how the worse thing that could have happened at the Newton home might be a lack of band-aids. He had more issues than my fertility weighing on his mind. When he returned back, we would need to talk more, I concluded.

We sat quietly together. Jammett had fallen asleep curled up to my backside.

After while, Jacob stood up. "I think I'm gonna say good-night. I just want you to know that I'm here anytime you need to talk about any of this stuff." I saw this was his peace offering. I knew I should take it. I stood and hugged him. He kissed me on the head and whispered, "I love you. Now, happy birthday and I hope Jammett gives you good company."

I only replied, "I'm sure he will." And then we walked out of my room and downstairs. I then followed him to the door.

"Goodnight, Jacob." I said earnestly.

"Night." He returned and then lightly kissed my forehead again before he went out to his car.

I returned to my bed and pet my new friend, Jammett, before getting ready for bed. I changed my clothes and gently lifted the covers attempting to not disturb his comfortable position. His purring presence was contenting. I drifted off to a cozy sleep after he curled up in the space behind my knees. I was a little worried about squishing him, but he seemed so happy I couldn't bring myself to move.


	6. Chapter 6 Permission (Back at the Farm)

Chapter 6 Permission -aka- Meanwhile, Back at the Farm...

-E POV -

It was near Bella's birthday when I realized I couldn't stay away from her any longer. I cleaned myself up as best I could and hunted so she wouldn't be aware of what our separation had done to me.

The week before I was in fetal position in an attic crawl space in an abandoned farm house in Argentina. I thought about her continuously. I didn't know how long it had been since I had last hunted but I knew it had been 360 days since I last saw her beautiful big brown eyes or heard her gentle voice speak my name, touched her soft hair, tasted her kisses, or smelled her luscious scent. The last time I saw her I spewed forth vicious lies about not wanting her. I left her calling me back. Her call to me has never stopped, though it isn't as panic stricken anymore. Sometimes a phantasm of her image stares at me shaking her long tresses. Her visage is aged and saddened. Sometimes I reach for her only to remember that I severed myself from her. I should have burned into a lavender pillar before causing her any grief.

Somewhere in there an ounce of sanity forced its way into the forefront of my senses. "Go back to her. Will she not be like the father who ran to the prodigal son? Does she not love you so?"

Did she love me so? How could I be sure? She was only human with human affections. Limited. Would she forgive me if I came and begged?

I decided to make plans to find out. I hunted before I left. There was plenty of wildlife on the farm grounds. I didn't want to be thirsty on the plane. Even after hunting the people on the plane were terrified of me. I wasn't dressed appropriately. My clothes were dirty, and there might have been a spider's egg sack on the underside of my collar that showed when I made certain moves. I almost laughed thinking of what fun Emmett might have with that.

I arrived at her house about the time I expected Charlie to be leaving, but he wasn't. Apparently, some friends were taking her to Port Angeles for a day of beauty while he prepared for a huge party at La Push. I wouldn't be able to see her yet. I decided to stay and let her scent drift from the house and offer healing. I started daydreaming, but I was aware that there were other supernatural beings present.

Then I heard what the wolf was thinking, he noticed my scent and he was coming for me. He was brave coming in his human form. I wondered if Bella hadn't told him about my mind reading abilities.

I remembered him from before, but he had changed quite a bit since then. The magic had made him taller and broader than a teenager. He looked like he could have been in his mid-twenties, but I had seen him looking fifteen at Bella's before and then at the prom. He certainly appeared older than me. I wondered briefly if she found him more attractive.

He growled belligerently as he approached me, "What are you doing here, Bloodsucker? Haven't you done enough damage? I am Jacob Black, grandson of Ephraim Black and member of the Quilieute protector wolves. I am prepared to stand up to you on her behalf." He remembered a bad time for Bella as he said all this. It seemed as if she had not yet shared knowledge of my gift, because I imagined he could have thought worse thoughts.

"I couldn't do it. I couldn't stay any longer. I miss her and her pull is too strong. I need her." I saw myself from his perspective and paid attention as he noted that I looked rather terrible myself. He was comparing the two of us. He was remembering her emotionally broken, ashen skinned and starved. She very nearly looked like a vampire, herself. How she suffered for my sake! What a horrible demon I am! Wretched wretch! Evil!

He broke my string of self-loathing thoughts, "Well, you're the last thing she needs. She's getting her life together after you broke her heart. She doesn't think she can ever move on."

Maybe he was right. I left her before, but... "I love her." Was my only answer to the both of us.

"Then why did you leave?" He was very confused. He wondered how I could hurt her so. I repeated my rationalization to him. "I'd have to turn her to make us equal. I couldn't do that to her." He agreed. She should be human and not an undead leach, he thought.

"And now?" He wondered why I couldn't love her enough to stay away.

"I guess my selfishness has grown." I answered truthfully.

"You don't deserve her to forgive you." I nodded in agreement. A truth I could never deny. I never deserved such a pure heart to love me. I was the most horrendous monster to even consider jeopardizing her life. I was wavering in my hopes that she would even want to take me back.

"I know." I answered simply.

We were quiet and his thoughts churned. He thought of how he loved her and how he could protect her. He thought of her smile. It was never as bright as my memory smiles from her, but they were from a present time whereas mine were now from the past. Doubts assailed me as he worked out his words.

"Listen, to me. I know you love her. Let me have a chance to try to convince her to let me love her. I know that I can love her deeply and make her happy. I think that it would be best if she stays human. You could come back and check on her from time to time. I could tell you about how she is doing. You could watch her from afar and know with certainty."

I sat quietly trying to not imagine her in his arms as she had been in mine. It burned me as penance should. It was more fierce a fire than the venom that changed me.

"Jacob Black, how do you propose to do this if she, as you said, doesn't think she could move on?" Hope assailed me with images that cannot be.

He sat down quietly and said, "I am a patient man. I would never push her into anything she wasn't ready for. I would rather hurt myself than to hurt her." He pictured himself sitting in the arm chair in Charlie's living room, being amenable, while she sat on the couch snuggled up with a red-eyed white furred cat in her lap and a transparent ghostly me sitting next to her with my arm around her shoulders. Unfortunately, I liked that I was in that thought but I was not unaware of certain things.

He did love her. He could be better for her. Perhaps he could give her more than I could in human terms. He was stronger than a regular human. He could protect her from my kind and from his.

"I will come back right here the day after her birthday next year. You will give me a good accounting of how she is and share about your progress with her heart." I said solemnly.

"I cannot deny how much you love her. I will do my best to give you a true description of how our... Friendship has grown. But we should meet at the treaty line nearest your home." He replied with some satisfaction dripping around his thoughts. I had given my one true rival permission to court my one true love. After all, I do need to know she has had a choice in the matter. As much as I want to be receiving her love I did want to know it was genuine.

I ran blindly north avoiding any other being that thought. I don't know where i was, but I ran up the side of a mountain searching a place to ruminate. All my plans had been swayed. My route detoured.

She's human. Her heart could be swayed, right? I didn't know what to wish. Should I hope that Jacob Black would save her or should I hope she would love me stubbornly? She was obstinate. I remembered how determined she was to get me to trust her with my secret.

I sat there for hours and then I heard thoughts in the distance.

"He's a Cullen, Seth. You need to stop. We can't fight him." That was Jacob.

"But he hurt Bella. I want to..." The one who must be Seth argued. She was part of their tribe in his thoughts. Family. He cared for her as his sister. In his mind he thought about how his mother and Charlie had moved into a companionable relationship that he was bothered by at first, but was now already becoming natural. He wanted to hurt me for hurting Bella. I should go down and let them rip me to shreds. I'm such a coward!

"No. There is the treaty. We have our honor to uphold." It was a more dominate voiced thought. It was laced with an order.

This intrigued me. It appeared that they were communicating telepathically. It appeared they couldn't hear my thoughts, though. How strange! Also, it appeared Jacob had not shared about seeing me earlier and apparently he still wasn't. I listened to them as they decided to go back. We were in Canada, after all, some distance from where they were supposed to be.

I decided to move on further north where it was beginning to snow. I found a cave. Hopefully, that would make tracking me harder. The snow would cover my scent. My family wouldn't be able to find me. I was definitely not in the mood to hear their opinions on the deal I had made with the wolf. I was certain that Alice knew about it. There was no blocking her sight, I thought.

A POV-

It had been nearly a year since my idiot brother made us promise to stay away from my best friend, Bella. I was terrified. Something strange was going on. I only got flickers of her future though I wasn't trying to see her. -Well, not at first, anyway. I have never been exactly able to be blind to someone once I'm so attuned to them. The unclear visions made me look harder for her, just to be sure she was safe, but the mystery deepened. I could see her at the university, but she disappeared more often at her home in Forks, now. I would be more afraid, but the university visions kept me firmly rooted where I said I would stay.

Edward was firmly planted in an attic in Argentina. I was torn about that. Part of me said we should go and care for him. A part of me said, 'you know what? He's made his bed, let him lie in it. Let him feel the pain of separation from his mate. When he is reunited with her, he will never be such an idiot again!' Or so I hoped.

It was about 2 in the afternoon when I saw him move. I squealed as I saw the path he was taking to Forks. Then after a bit I was tortured again because he blanked out of sight. When he reappeared was surrounded by snow with no markers about to enter a random cave somewhere, I assumed within a reasonable radius from Forks.

What could be causing the flickers in my sight? It was happening to Bella who was in Forks, but not when she was in Seattle. It was happening to Edward when he was in Forks. Why is that? Who or what is in Forks?

I started paying closer attention to Bella, because Edward wasn't moving from his spot in the cave. He had already eaten the bears that were in there.

I had a vision of Bella driving toward LaPush. She crossed the treaty line, had a smile of recognition, and then she disappeared getting out of the truck. LaPush. It was the wolves. I couldn't see the wolves? I didn't know they existed anymore. I needed to talk to Carlisle.

When he came home from the hospital I met him in the driveway. "Carlisle, I've had a few visions of Edward." He was pleased at that. "And flickers of Bella." We walked inside toward his office as we talked. The others were out hunting.

"Has he gone back to her?" He asked hopefully.

"He started to. Then something happened and he changed his mind." His face fell as I said this. "I'm sorry. I think..." I wasn't sure of myself and he could hear it in my voice. "I think my faulty visions have to do with the Quilieute wolves."

"That can't be. I'm almost certain they are extinct."

"I'm fairly sure they're not. Bella disappears shortly after crossing the treaty line." He looked at me knowing I wasn't supposed to be looking.

"Disappears? " He was quite concerned.

"Quite often. When we first left she stayed at home or went to school all the time. Then Charlie threatened to send her to live with her mother and she started forcing herself to do things. She went to a movie with Jessica Stanley. She visited our house. She drove around one day in a daze and bought a motorcycle. That's when she started flickering. "

"A motorcycle? " He was worried about the accident prone girl.

"Well, two actually. I don't know if she ever rode one. I've never seen her do that, but she has had injuries that suggests she might.

"Injuries?" His care for his would-have-been daughter of sorts evident in the tenor of his voice and the crease in his brow.

"She hides them from Charlie, Carlisle. Whatever it is she's hiding it from him. I didn't see her graduation, but she is attending the University in Seattle." He looked pleased with that news. "I see her there clearly, but she flickers on weekends when she goes home."

"Hmmm... And Edward, where is he now?" He asked. I knew he missed his friend and son of sorts. We were all special to him, but he felt more paternally obligated toward Edward than the rest of us.

"He went to Washington. He hunted and dressed nicely. He was near Bella's when he disappeared and then reappeared some time later in a cave. He won't move. He's in the same emotional state that he was in Argentina, if not worse. He's killed the bears that were sleeping in the cave. I don't know where he is other than that."

He sat quietly thinking for a while. "We will remain here so he can find us if he needs us. I wonder how we can find out about the wolves."

"I will look diligently for clues in the flickers." I vowed. I didn't share about the headaches the flickers gave me.

"One more thing Alice," I looked at him expectant of what he would say next. "Don't forget about Jasper. He's been looking a little lost and I'm wondering if you haven't been thinking too hard about these flickers."

I held up my hand in mock oath, "I will pay attention to my husband."

He laughed before the wait of uncertainty returned to his shoulders.

A/N

In the Jacob and Edward scene, Jake doesn't know that Edward can read minds, yet. He is just in the habit of blocking his mind already from the rest of the pack. His thoughts about Bella really bother Seth and Leah now that their families are becoming closer. Leah's pretty fierce. She's probably bitten him a few times for it. Do not doubt it!

Thanks for reading,

JaelSarjenka!


	7. Chapter 7 Nothing Scary

_A/N This chapter is leading to a significant change in the story. Leah is going to become a more prominent figure in this story as she and Bella are becoming closer. As they make plans to do things together, she is stepping out of her depression caused by the loss of the relationships that were messed up due to Sam imprinting on Emily._

 _You might get the idea that I dislike it when people mope. I guess it's true. My momma always said, "If you don't like something, don't whine about it. Do something." I think it's great advice. Sometimes the only thing you can do about a situation is to change how you're looking at it, because we can't change others._

 _Disclaimer: It would be great if I could have a sparkly dream, write about it, have millions fall in love with it, and love the characters so much that they write fan fiction about them. Alas, that is Stephenie Meyer' Twilight, not mine. I'm just part of the throng of fan fiction writers._

Chapter 7 Nothing Scary

I woke to Jammett softly licking my cheek. I would come to learn that that type of awakening meant, "My food dish is empty, lazy human. Get up and fill it." At least he was polite about it. I didn't know much from cats. I had only had fish before and that didn't go over so well. I've been told that cats are easier to take care of because they are inherently more independent. Or haughty. Take your pick. I got up and found indeed he was in need of food.

It appeared Charlie had already helped himself to breakfast, cleaned up, and had left. There was no mess for me to clean up. I rummaged though the cabinets trying to decide what to have. I finally decided to have a poptart because it was there and was easy to prepare. I didn't even put it in the toaster. I just put it straight in my mouth.

I had dreamed of Edward again last night. I dreamt that he lied beside me and stroked my hair and lightly kissed me. I felt very content. Dream Edward told me that he loved me and would until the end of time. I believed Dream Edward, after all, my dreams were often the most true and astute of my perceptions. I was glad that the nightmares that I had after he first left had dissipated from my subconscious. I thought that was due to my change in mindset. Positivity begets positivity and all that.

Jammett finished eating about the same time I did. He returned to me to have his ears scratched, purring loudly. He was a happy boy. While I was petting him, I noticed that the house was cleaner than usual. Had I helped Charlie see the need for a clean house or was he trying to impress Sue? Or was she over here frequently enough to clean for him?

I decided I would go to La Push to see Sue. I jumped in my truck and started it up to leave. I wanted to talk to her more about the future. I wondered if she could narrow down some dates. I sure missed that little pixie Alice. She could seeit all. I wondered if she was watching me or if Edward had forbidden her. I wasn't sure her visions were something that was like that. I didn't think it could just be turned off.

Imagine my surprise to find Charlie's cruiser in Leah's parking spot when I arrived. I decided to go to Billy's instead not wanting to interupt whatever...

Pulling up to Billy's house, I didn't have time to put the truck into park before a wide smiling Jake ran out to see me. I shut it off and pulled out the key, but he already opened the door for me. His enthusiasm scared me. I was afraid he was starting to love me in spite of our prior conversation. I hoped he wasn't turned on by it, thinking of me as hard to get. I wasn't good at playing games of that sort. They never seemed to benefit anyone, leaving someone hurt in the end. I really had hoped to not have any affect on him at all. I couldn't give him anything on that front. I wasn't gonna back down.

My physical interests were not for warm embraces but for cold caresses that left me shivering for more. I guess that's the problem. I always wanted more.

I walked into Billy's living room and found Seth asleep there on the couch that was much too small for him. I looked questioningly at Jake.

"We ran patrols together last night and he was too tired to make it all the way home." He answered my curiosity.

"Patrols? Is there something going on?" I was on a pendulum between hope and worry. Friend or foe?

"No scary reasons, Bella. Just normal patrols." He thought a moment before adding, "And Seth seemed to want to run out of the country."

"Really?"

"Really." He gave me a look that I couldn't place, but I was certain he was keeping something from me. "You know, it's hard to balance school and normal life stuff with being who we are. Behaving in a way that doesn't cause suspicion among the neighbors is difficult for us sometimes. We get pent up energy and antsy."

I thought that I've heard that before, but I only said, "Oh." As if it never had crossed my mind. As if I never had contemplated what that might be like if... Well, what ifs were't my friends. They just made me more antsy and disinclined to share company with others.

"So, what are you doing today, Bella?" Jake asked, running his fingers through his short hair.

"Well, I was hoping to talk to Sue about something, but when I got there, the cruiser was there too." I answered quietly.

"Hmmm... " He thought about that and then said, "Did he come home last night?" And he looked at me with eyebrows raised.

"I can't confirm if he did or did not. I was asleep before he would have come back and he wasn't there when I woke up. All I know is that Jammett's dish was empty." I felt myself blush at the idea that my very adult father might have spent the night away. Before Jake could say anything more, I rushed to add, "And I'm not asking him about it. I'd want him to respect my privacy. And yes, I have gone through similar experiences with Renee. Thankfully, both my parents are nice enough to have their... Um... Quality time elsewhere."

After these revelations, I was ready to go home. I couldn't even look at Jake anymore. This was just way too much! So I told him,"I think I'm going home. I need some tea and a soak."

Jake laughed as he walked me to my truck. Didn't stop laughing really. It was almost strange, but most certainly awkward.

I stopped off at the general store on my way out of the Rez and bought some herbal bubble bath and some incense.

This was gonna take a while to get through. It was different than with flighty Renee. Charlie is my rock. I can't imagine him going all crazy. So I had my soak.

I called Jake to say I'd see him next weekend. He promised me a quiet night with a movie and pizza on Friday. I figured there was a good chance I wouldn't see much of Charlie if his relationship with Sue had progressed to the state I imagined. I left him a short message to say good-bye and remind him to feed the cat. I pet Jammett good-bye and felt myself missing the little hairball before I got in my truck. I realized this semester would be my only semester in the dorms. I had to find a pet friendly apartment to rent and a good roommate.

The semester ended quickly and I was able to talk Leah into sharing an apartment with me as well as enrolling into culinary school. She was amazing in the kitchen and I was hoping that I would be the guinea pig of many a tasty class assignment.

We lucked into a good deal with the apartment. Two students from Kansas had spent all their time partying and neglecting academic work. They were being asked to leave. We took over their lease with their land lord's blessing. He said we looked more trustworthy than his other applicants.

Seattle had had a slight increase of violence since the first part of this year. It had picked up right after spring break. Everyone was trying to keep themselves feeling safe in one manner or another.

It made me feel safer to have Leah as my room mate. She was tough in more ways in one. She never let the guys in the pack have the last word. She's been known to sock a perverted drunk making cat-calls before.

She was cold with me at first, but I think that the kindness and consideration I showed her family after Harry's death softened her toward me. We had already been on the road to friendship with our having had lost love footing, but that I gave her my time and warmth sealed it for us. We were both determined to be sisters now. Especially after watching our parents growing in love together, we felt the need to help that along. Surely if we already acted like sisters, it would let them know that we were happy with their relationship.

Christmas was a fascinating time as the blending of our families was well evidenced. Leah and I were sure that though our parents hadn't said anything definite, that they would be talking about how serious their relationship was getting. I was thinking that a new sister and brother would be the best gift Charlie could give me. On the other hand, I supposed they had already given themselves to me on their own. As sisterly as Leah had been treating me, Seth had begun to tease me sweetly. His nickname for me away from certain ears was "Vampire girl." Some of the others had adopted it as well as Leah's cousin, Sam's imprint. I started calling her the "Wolf girl."

I was pleased that Emily and Leah were doing their best to be friends. When Leah, Sam, and Emily were in the same room, I felt the need to be closer to Leah as did Seth. Paul, who was a bit aggravating in the first place, would often make pointed comments that made everyone uncomfortable. I expected Leah to get him on more than one occasion, but she somehow held herself with poise and only returned her own words of insult.

Leah, Sue, and I worked together to put together a very large feast at their house on Christmas Eve. Jake and Billy were invited. With Jake, Leah, and Seth there, we were almost guaranteed no leftovers to put away. Sue commented that her butter bowls should likely be taken for recycling as she really had no need of them since appetites had increased.

We had a wonderful time together with only a few strained moments. First Jake had brought a mistletoeand hung it in a high traffic area in the doorway between the dining area and the living room. I worked very hard to be alone when passing under it. It was difficult, because Jacob had been trying to catch me passing under it. Seth, feeling more and more like a protective brother toward me, would often try to intercept and give me safe passage. But he caught me once and I endured a soft warm kiss on the lips. I smiled at him, but my heart screamed for me to get away from the unfamiliar feeling. I craved the ice cold lips of my beloved. I'm sure he saw my inner dialogue in some manner played out on my face, because he uncomfortably walked away. I guessed he was looking for something more from me and perhaps from himself in this kiss. I didn't know why he thought he should settle for me when magic might have a special person waiting in the wings for him that he hadn't seen yet.

The second moment of discomfort came when Sue caught Charlie under the mistletoe. Apparently, Billy was unaware of how close Sue and Charlie had become in the past few months. He made a rather disapprovingly disgusted sound as they had gone a few seconds into their sweet kiss. It caused them to pull apart blushing and looking down at the floor. Perhaps Billy wasn't as much unaware as jealous. I wasn't sure which.

Renee called early pacific time on Christmas Day and we had a great talk. Phil was going to become a coach for a team, now. They were just pleased as punch with all the travel they would be able to do. The pay was going to be fantastic, and she wanted me to visit when I had a chance. I asked if it would be ok if I brought Leah with me who was fast becoming my new best friend. Renee was happy to have her and Leah was ecstatic to think of time at the beach. Jake was pleased that I would have a "protector" with me. Apparently he was concerned that time passing since my last dangerous interlude might mean that the clock was ticking against my favor. If I didn't know better I'd have thought he had been tallking to Edward with his notions of my being a "danger magnet." I could only imagine an exchange between the two. I doubt it would be a good one. My memory of that First Beach dream flashed in my mind.

We planned the trip for Spring Break. I was determined to have a drama free vacation if possible. Leah seemed to be thinking along those same thoughts. She said she had a good feeling about the trip and that just the thought of going was making her feel better than she had in quite some time. There was certainly a light in her eyes each time we talked about it that I hadn't seen before.

During break between moving into our new apartment and showing Leah around the city, we spent time at Charlie's. Sue was usually there cooking. The Clearwater home was bigger, but the wolves were sleeping there during the day. They all seemed to have eaten too much turkey between Christmas and New Year's. I was beginning to think it was their kryptonite except that they were growing larger, if that was even possible. I wondered what it meant briefly. I convinced myself I didn't want to know.

Charlie and Sue never made a formal declaration to us before we left, but they did kiss in front of us often and without shame, which we took to be the same. They were always touching each other on the shoulder or holding hands. They seemed pleased that we were all on board with their progression. We were all happy to think of ourselves moving toward becoming a family.


	8. Chapter 8 Spring Break

Chapter 8 Spring Break

Time passed quickly. Jammett was becoming a big tom. I had him fixed right before we left for our spring break trip. I took him to Charlie's where he and Sue promised to love on him while I was gone. I bought extra yummy treats for him. He deserved it, poor baby.

Leah and I decided to wait to buy new clothes until we landed in Florida and so our luggage was very light with just one change of clothes, and undergarments. We weren't even sure how to dress. The forecast seemed iffy. It was another thing to make me miss Alice. She could tell me the weather and she would have had just the right clothes for me. Sometimes I missed playing dress-up. Yes. I did. Don't tell her I thought that. I was sure that when we reconnected I would tire of it quickly, but I would enjoy her personality more after this separation.

Renee and Phil met us at the airport. They were beaming with pleasure at the sight of both of us. They welcomed Leah just as warmly as they did me. I was a tiny bit worried about her being the daughter of Charlie's new love interest, but Renee appeared to look way over that. I think she was pleased that Charlie had finally moved on. There must be some weight lifted from that burden.

Charlie and Sue were just as happy as these two were. Everyone around me was so happy. The positive energy was contagious. Jasper would get it. He would enjoy soaking up all the good vibes too. I wished there was a way to join all my families together in happiness. I get that Edward would have demanded they stay away from me. It would hurt them all to not sever ties completely. It's not as simple as me living away from Phil and Renee. I can call them without danger. The supernatural world had to remain apart. But then I had my wolf family who walked the fine line as protectors of one world from the other.

My mother, bless her, had noticed my wistfulness. She would ask me about it later. I would tell her it had to do with enjoying that she is happy with Phil and Charlie was happy with Sue.

Of course, she remembered them from their younger days. Harry had been Charlie's friend since the beginning of time, it seemed. She remembered Leah as a baby and toddler from before she left with me."

Leah and I were not fatigued from our trip at all and shopping did seem the logical thing to do. It would be in the mid- eighties to nineties while we were there - warmer than normal for this time of year even in Florida. The end of the week would be a little stormy. Phil teased us about bringing our weather with us.

We shopped till we dropped and I enjoyed myself even though I don't like shopping. Watching Leah's joy at the few purchases we were making was entertaining. Maybe I was growing up more, as I was seeing value in others' interests.

Renee and Phil's home was a sweet bungalow a few blocks from the beach. We went straight there after removing tags from our newly purchased swimwear and donning them. I made sure I reminded everyone to wear their sunscreen. Phil commented, "Yes, Baz Luhrmann." I looked at him confused. He responded, "Nevermind, good advice is wasted on the young." And he shook his head.

I didn't get it, but I decided to look it up later. What's the use of the internet if you can't use it to connect with the people in your life? Google could be responsible for helping people understand each other.

We decided to walk to the beach because we ate a big dessert following our sensible lunch. Phil followed in the car in case we were too tired to walk back.

On our walk, we told Renee about our library work that I somehow neglected to share prior. I'm not really sure about how I managed to forget that. Leah updated her about other things I do, making me to sound like a saint. Renee looked at me surprised.

"You are growing into a more well-rounded person, Sweetie! I always thought you were mature for your age, but your world was still too small. It only held you and your family. Now you are thinking of others in most fantastic way. I'm proud. And you're getting out of your shyness a bit. That will be helpful if you continue studying psychology. Later we will have to have a talk about all your plans face to face."

I thought I'd better quiet this down. "I don't do these things to make you proud. It seemed like a better outlet for my feelings -to help others- than to wallow in my sadness." There it was out. I felt much better for it.

"It's a very healthy coping mechanism. Better philanthropy than less useful means of coping. I'm sorry you're still sad."She ran her fingers through my hair and gave me a quick side hug. "Now let's cope by replacing sad feelings with beachy happiness!"

Leah watched me. We hadn't talked about our broken hearts in a while. I didn't know if she was any closer to pink glitter hearts. I did see concern in her eyes. I knew then she was truly my sister.

We got to the beach and we ran into the water. There were only a few families there taking advantage of the glorious day. I don't know how we lucked out on that.

"Leah and Bella!" Renee called over our giggles after we had been there for at least an hour. We left the water and ran to her side. "We are moving down the beach a little ways where Phil is building a fire and the real reason Phil brought the car was to bring the big cooler with hotdogs and s'mores ingredients. I know this is smaller than the Bon fires you're accustomed to, but they sound so much fun that this seemed to be a good welcome for you."

Leah and I laughed as we walked with her down the beach. The sun was lower in the sky and soon it would be twilight. I shivered at the thought. I tried to imagine where Edward might be. The thought passed quickly that he might need a philanthropic diversion also. I knew in the depths of my heart that he loved me still. I hoped he wasn't being reckless and stupid elsewhere in the world as he tried to convince himself that he was still doing the right thing by staying away. I often wondered about the misunderstanding that would keep him away when he would try to come back. Was I being too happy? Would he see me laughing with friends and assume that my heart was light without him? It was only Sue's prophecy that kept me afloat to find diversions. Without that, I don't know if I could keep going. I had hope. What did Edward have? Would Alice be able to see me and help him? Or would that lead to the misunderstanding?

We reached Phil and his fire and he had beach chairs for us set up in a semi circle so we could see the fire and the sunset. The fire was so small in comparison. The sun was beautiful as it sank out of sight eclipsing the beauty of the fire, but leaving it there as a reminder. They were both fire.

Phil thought ghost stories would be appropriate for the fireside. I started by telling about a girl who haunted my dorm. "I never saw her personally, but others claimed that she opened drawers and flung clothes in the floor. She was a girl who died having a heart attack after finding her boyfriend and her roommate together in a compromising situation In their room. Her roommate also happened to be wearing her favorite outfit. A black dress. They supposedly buried her in that same black dress."

"No wonder she can't rest!" Renee exclaimed. And we all laughed.

Leah told some ancient stories about spirit warriors , cold ones, and the sacrifice of a woman only known as the third wife, who I was guessing was an imprint of the chief in the story. She referred to them as spirit warriors throughout, but I understood that there was a change after a spirit possessed a wolf. She wouldn't fully disclose her people's legends like that.

"Leah, that is quite a story! You should write it down to sell." Renee interjected.

"It's not mine to sell. It belongs to the Quilieute people. I would dishonor them by doing so." She replied quietly.

Phil told how that up until a few years ago this stretch of beach was unsafe at night, but a kind rich gentleman took an interest in the area and slowly but surely the riffraff stopped hiding out down there. He pointed out to a barrier quite a ways a way.

"He is said to have a skin problem and is usually seen with long pants and sleeves, hat and gloves. He usually wears more beach like clothes on terribly cloudy days when others would rather stay away. He always wears the sunglasses, though."

Leah and I looked at each other with slightly raised brows. Sounded vampirish to me- the entire description! Right down to cleaning up the beach. Better mind my own business. I think Leah came to the same conclusion. Her face changed minutely, but I was getting to know her very well. Renee and Phil wouldn't have noticed. She lightly shook her head. I took that as confirmation that she had the same thoughts and was choosing to shake it off.

The fire died down and we returned home. We fell into beds after showering, exhausted from the fun we had had.

The next morning, we ate bananas and oranges on the back patio. Renee was trying to learn some landscaping skills. Her plants flourished here in the humid sun where they had shriveled in the dryness that accompanied the heat in Arizona. I appreciated seeing how she was thriving. Phil was good for her. Florida added to that.

I sat back to ponder it for a minute. I remembered there was an episode of Will and Grace where Jack has a vision of Cher telling him to "follow your bliss." I think that was Renee's mantra too. She wasn't simply leaving the dismal weather climate when she left Forks and Charlie. She needed to grow in other ways. It seemed to her that Forks stunted her growth. It's enhanced mine, I think.

The week was spent in pleasant conversation and excursions. We went out on a glass bottomed boat to see the ocean life. We visited an aquarium on another day. By Thursday the weather turned dark. There was a curious part of my mind that wondered if we might get a glimpse of the reclusive millionaire. It would help bring me relief to find I didn't have to worry about my mother being attacked in the night.

I thought Leah might also be wondering about him. Neither of us broached the subject.

Once when I was serving a meal at a soup kitchen in Seattle, a young couple who was also volunteering there told me that they had lived in an old house in Kentucky that might have been haunted. Each of them had had experiences observing a floating ball of light and an eerie atmosphere accompanied it. There was a chill in the air. They never shared with each other about these while they lived there, but after they moved away they talked about it and weren't surprised that the other had seen it. They also understood why the other said nothing.

This situation was similar. I was sure we'd talk about it when we returned to Washington, but I was determined to not speak of it aloud until then. I imagined she felt the same way. For one thing, if we were right, well, the walls have ears, don't they?

As it started to rain, we decided to watch a movie and stay in until it cleared off. This suited us well, because we were very tired out from the great times we were having. So we logged onto Netflix and started watching Super natural episodes we hadn't seen yet. Yes, I was a glutton for punishment.

Soon the rain lifted and we were needing to stretch so we all walked to the beach. I knew something was up when Leah stopped. She smelled trouble, literally. I thought it would be best to play dumb. There was a pale figure on the beach who was upwind from us and hadn't smelled Leah yet. She was trying to decide what was best to do. He had seen us already. We wouldn't have been able to run in any case. If I was right, there would be no point in it. It would be better to stay near Leah, the strongest of us.

Renee, blissfully unaware, spoke, "Girls, there is that kind millionaire we were telling you about at out beach party. He's the one who saved this stretch of beach."

He walked toward us and his countenance was light as he came nearer. Perhaps he would just think we had a pet dog who slept in our clothes, I hoped. He had long dark hair and a strong chin. His cheek bones made me wonder if there was Native American blood in him, perhaps Seminole or Cherokee. He was probably about 6 foot tall. His gait was graceful.

He extended a hand to Phil and they exchanged pleasantries. He nodded to the rest of us, but gave Leah a strange look. He started to walk away, but hesitatingly returned. He looked at Leah and me and smiling at her downcast eyes, invited us to his home for a cookout. It seemed he was alone for the week and feeling lonely. Phil and Renee accepted this invitation on our behalf. We planned to meet him on the beach by his home in an hour.

I thought that the evening would be interesting.

We took the car even though it wasn't that long of a walk. Renee worried the storm would return and ruin her little dress that she wore.

We arrived at the front of his property that had a semi-circle drive in the front and a drive into his 4 car garage to the side. The yard was neatly manicured. There were palm trees lining a walk way and there were flower beds to the side that had been recently planted. The front of the mansion was a type of stucco. It looked to be 3 stories tall. I wondered how many rooms.

We were doing our best "normal" impression, as well as a "vampire girl" and a wolf could under the uncertain circumstances. Well, I'm sure she had to smell him though she didn't confirm nor deny it while we were briefly at Renee's. She didn't try to dissuade us from the visit, which I found odd. We walked up to the door and Phil pressed the ornately designed doorbell button.

William opened the door himself. He was wearing his sunglasses, tan long light linen slacks and long sleeved buttoned up shirt made of a soft fabric I wasn't familiar with.

He led told us to follow him out and around a walkway to the patio in the back. He had an entire outdoor kitchen and party area. He pointed to the high table nearest and requested Phil stand with him as he cooked some wonderful smelling steaks on the grill. He flipped them onto a platter and carried them to show us before he served us.

He took off his glasses and Leah and I both gasped lightly at his golden eyes. He knew we knew.

I caught him looking at me with a familiar look of frustrated curiosity. It was like the face Edward made when I first met him. I wondered if he also read minds, but couldn't read mine. He seemed to have a light awe as he looked at Leah.

He plated the steaks with finesse and added baked potatoes from an outdoor oven and grilled pineapples. He didn't set a place for himself which didn't surprise Leah or myself, but Renee had to ask before she took her first bite.

"Where's yours?"

"I have diet restrictions that keep me from enjoying such things." He looked pointedly at Leah and me as he spoke. "I used to be a chef at a fine restaurant before my illness set in. I enjoyed watching people enjoy my handiwork. So, it pleases me that you have accepted my invitation. I don't even have any family left to dote upon." He disclosed quietly. He closed his eyes and looked down. Then he looked up and smiled at Leah. I thought he might be taken with her. I wondered if he knew what she was and how that played in his thoughts. How I wished Edward was there to tell me the behind the scenes story. I hoped time was closing for me to find him. Maybe William could help me in some way.

The steaks were perfect. They were medium rare and so moist. I heard Leah growl lightly at her first bite. I looked up in concern, but her face conveyed total enjoyment. Hers looked more rare than mine. Of course the wolf in her would like that.

We spent the evening in light conversation. William told us stories of restaurants that he worked in up and down the coast. It was a nice evening. I was astounded with Leah. She was relaxed and easy going in this vampire's home. I expected that she would be more defensive and have more feistiness in her words with him. She was almost instantly matured in speech. I've never heard her more lady. like and polite. It was surreal.

As we were leaving, he took her hand in his and brought it to his mouth for a soft kiss. I waited for her to smack him and nearly passed out as she blushed instead. Then I realized that there was only one reason a wolf would let a vampire kiss her hand. I would have sworn it to be impossible. It had to be the magic. It had to be imprinting. I couldn't think of any other explanation for it.

I watched them closely. They had eyes only for each other. I wondered if he knew that there was more than just simple attraction. Did he suspect the supernatural leading? Did he just know? Was it simply realizing who your mate is?

We left and it seemed difficult for her to walk away from the door. It was a long drive to Renee and Phil's for my impatience, though it might have actually been faster had we walked since we had to park the car and wait for Phil to quickly run a duster across to be sure the car was glowing.

Renee kept glancing at Leah. I knew their behavior wouldn't be missed by anyone with eyes, and my mother can be astute. She'd notice the magic without knowing about imprinting magic. It was almost tangible by the time we had left. I was hoping she would hold her tongue and let Leah and I speak privately in the guest room. She must have noticed that need from me.

We finally entered and thankfully Leah went straight back to the guest room and I followed. I had to know if my speculation was correct.

There were two full sized beds in the room set up like motel style. Renee said it was for when Phil's parents came to visit. They no longer shared a bed due to medical equipment. They might not like each other anymore either, but that's not my business. I don't know why I felt Leah's possible imprinting on a vampire was my business, but at this point I was making it so.

She sat straight up on her bed for a few minutes and then with huge exhalation flung herself backwards. "Why!?" She whispered loudly with teeth clenched. "Why would the great spirits cause me to phase as a wolf and then why in the world would they have me imprint on a vampire?"

It was the first time she had ever mentioned the word straight out. Normally it was a derogatory term like leech, tick, or mosquito that she used. Now, I knew she'd never profane his existence with such words.

"I don't know him. I want to know everything. I want to know why he would become a "vegetarian" vampire as the Cullen's call themselves. How did he become one? What is his story? What is he like? What is his favorite color? Is his real name William?"

I sat quietly as she continued like this for an hour, She was incredulous that fate would pair her with her people's enemy.

But she couldn't be still for long. She looked at me and said, "I have to go back. We have 2 days left here. I've got to find out who he is. I need to know if he truly feels the magic too." Then she looked at the floor, "If he can want me after he knows the truth."

I encouraged her, "Leah, go. Follow your heart. If he doesn't feel the same come back and we will drown our sorrows in ice cream. I don't expect that to be what happens, though. He returned your glances with interest. He kissed your hand. I don't think he would have done that if he didn't feel something."

She stood resolutely and drew from her inner strength. "I'm going." We walked through the living room to the front door.

"Do you want me to come too?" I offered.

"No. I think I have to do this myself. Besides, I'd like you here ready, in case I need that ice cream." She started through the door and then turned to me, "I can't believe I'm about to do this without phasing first."

I knew she meant meeting a vampire on his own turf and leaving herself vulnerable.

I returned to the guest room and curled up in a ball on my side in my bed. The aching for Edward had grown while watching the birth of whatever is going on between Leah and William. I hoped that the time for us to reunite would come soon.

 _ **A/N The next chapter will be from Leah's POV. I only have a couple chapters where Bella's not telling the story. She can't tell the next chapter as well as Leah can.**_

 _ **Hope you will like it.**_

 _ **Did anyone know anything about Baz Luhrmann?**_

 _ **Thanks!**_

 _ **JaelSarjenka**_


	9. Chapter 9 Fire and Ice

_**"Suddenly, in so many ways, my whole world had shifted."**_

 _Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer created the Twilight world and were are but little ants reading the pages and adding our own thoughts and divergent paths in fan fiction._

Chapter 9 Fire and Ice

Leah's POV

I left Renees's following the pull to William's house. The night was a little foggy from the storm system, but I gave it little notice. I could see fine with my enhanced sight. I wasn't sure that I was supposed to feel anything other than desire for my mate, but I had worried he would reject me when he knew my secrets. But the wolf in me kept striding forward, she wanted to make her mate hers. In a normal imprinting relationship, the wolf screams to mate, the bond is completed as soon as possible. The pair is considered married by tribal law as soon as the realization of imprinting occurs. The government still required a license for tax purposes, of course.

The only exception to the drive to mate with an imprint I knew of was Quil and Claire. Even his inner wolf knew she was too young. My mate was not too young. I wondered briefly how old he was, but I was reaching his driveway, then walkway, and finally the door.

I hesitated for a minute contemplating the situation once more. The words "mortal enemies" kept swimming to the surface. I was incredulous with this thing that was happening to me. I had walked the short distance to the home of a vampire in human form in hopes that he returned the same strange and sudden affection that was birthed in me just hours ago. Should I be here? What if this was a false feeling from a weird gift he had. I knew vampires were often gifted. Bella didn't talk much about the Cullens as it saddened her. I didn't remember her saying outright that any of them had gifts at all, but we had all suspected things. What if he was luring me here to overtake me as a potential interloper of his plans to kill Bella or her parents? Somehow I doubted that. I wanted to trust him.

Then my mind wandered to ways he might over power me. Some were quite nice because my inner wolf wanted to take him and do things with him that were far from severing limbs and setting him ablaze with fire. Fire of a different sort caused me to stand firm. No matter how crazy this was, I wanted to see him and find them truth.

I started to knock. But I could hear him on the other side approaching the door. He had heard me. He opened the door and I stared into his beautiful golden eyes. He stared back seeming to be as captivated as was I.

Neither of us said anything as he took my hand and led me through a grand foyer into a sitting room decorated in varying shades of brown with cream accents. We sat on a chocolate sofa and drank in each other as if we were long parted lovers now reunited. I couldn't look away and I was at a loss for words.

"Leah" He reverently spoke my name and it sent thrills of shivers through my being. I briefly closed my eyes to savor the feeling. He breathed and began again, "Leah, I know what has happened between us. I am the happiest that I could be. I thought I was cursed to a lonely existence, but here you are, a lovely flame in my darkness." He brushed the hair from my face. My chin length hair was in disarray from the wind and misty fog.

"You know what has happened?" I was surprised.

"I have a talent." He began. "I know a person's secrets. I don't exactly read minds, but once a thought is meant to be hidden, it pops up in my mind. It's very strange, but that's the best I can explain it."

"So, you know everything?" I marveled at the relief that washed over me.

"It depends what you are meaning. I can only know what you meant for me or the others to not know. As I walked up to you on the beach, before we made eye contact, you meant to keep secret that you could shift into a wolf and that you knew what I was." He took my hand and pressed it to his cheek. "Then you struggled to keep the imprinting from someone, me? Bella? Her parents?"

"Nothing like that could get by Bella or her mother, obviously, you know. The only one to seem oblivious is Phil, but that might have only been for my benefit." I laughed as I considered Phil trying to pretend he didn't notice. He was a nice guy. He was certainly able to do that. "Of course Renee and Phil have no knowledge of the supernatural, but, yes, I was hoping they wouldn't notice."

"Why?" He wondered.

"Well, I suppose this is not a thing I could possibly anticipate, so I don't know what to do with it." I tried to explain.

"What do you want to do?" His voice was laced with worry.

"Several things. I want to phase and run to a place to howl in frustration that things worked out this way. I want to find the Fates and slap them silly. I want to pack up and leave back to Washington as if there were no issue here. However, the thing I want to do most is to stay and learn more about you, to ask you so many questions -I don't know where to start, and the wolf in me wants me to claim you as my mate..." My voice quivered. "...In every way. It is overwhelming and confusing."

"You want to leave?" He was overcome with anxiety and sadness. He likely saw my shame and what I had thought about "mortal enemies" that I was not about to voice out loud.

"Not really. I don't think I could leave you now, without causing us both severe emotional and physical pain. I'm just so overwhelmed. Yesterday morning I woke thinking that I was finding a way to be whole." I took a deep breath to tell him the whole story. I knew if I tried to hide it, he would know anyway. It was better to be up front and honest. "A few years ago I was engaged to a man named Sam who was from my tribe. He began to phase a year after we became exclusive. He had acted strange, but he couldn't explain to me the cause. We are supposed to keep it a secret. We can only tell our imprints. The rest of our family can't know unless they already know by other means." I paused confirming he understood.

"My cousin Emily came to visit me. She was my best friend -closer than a sister. He came over to see me while she was there. Their eyes locked and she eclipsed me. Where he loved me as much as he could, he loved her with a limitless love. When I became a wolf, I had to feel it. You see, we are mentally linked by the pack magic and Sam is the Alpha. I found it depressing. Imprinting isn't supposed to happen to just any one. It's special. We don't even fully understand it. All I know is that when I looked at you, really looked at you, the magic sparked. It was like I found the reason for my existence, to love you."

He stopped me, "And I knew you were my mate. I feel this strong pull toward you. It hurt me physically as you left. I have been fighting with myself about coming to you. It was ungentlemanly of me to wait for you to come to me. I was about to leave when I heard you and smelled your scent coming toward my house. I want to learn about you and tell you all about myself. I think we have a long time for that. But I am afraid of something." He hesitated to continue.

"What is that?" I wanted to tell him anything he wanted to know.

"Are your people mortal or immortal."

I knew where he was going with this. "I am less mortal than Bella. I can be killed, but it would take more to kill me than the average human. Theoretically, I can't age until I stop phasing regularly. So I might be able to live as long as you. Not many of us have tried. We do live quite a bit longer. Although, I am the first female wolf of my tribe, as far as any of the histories tell us."

He sighed in relief, "I am very glad to hear that. I'm sorry to be so selfish, but I was concerned about what I would do if you were to die."

I wanted to look beyond that possible future. I guess I just wanted to enjoy the moment and so I interjected, "Maybe we should just focus on getting to know each other. Let me tell you about myself."

It was so wonderful spending the night talking curled up on his couch. I disclosed as much as I could think of and the he told me the little that he remembered about his human life which mainly settled around his work as a chef.

He told about how he had lived on the East Coast at the time he was changed by a lonely vampire during a particularly cold winter. He was the last to leave the restaurant that night. She saw him walking home and found him attractive, so she decided to change him in hopes of ending her loneliness. They started using William's gift of seeing secrets to kill only evil people. Thieves, cheaters, rapists, and murderers. His creator wasn't satisfied with him as he didn't fill the emptiness. Also, she wasn't as picky about who she killed. Blood was blood to her. The truth was that he wasn't what she was looking for.

They travelled back and forth across the continent and finally she ran into another vampire who was her mate. He left them to each other because at that point it was kind of awkward to be with them.

He was near Gatlinburg when he ran into Emmett and Rosalie Cullen on one of their breaks from the family. He imagined it would be nice to have an existence like theirs. He doubted they would want him around after the way he had been, but he had hoped to find others. He didn't ask them about other such vampires but he figured they'd be rare.

It took him a few decades to get desensitized to humans so he could live on the beach. It was a risk to live in such a sunny place but he took precautions with wearing long clothes, hats, and sunglasses. He told curious people he had a rare skin condition and thanks to Michael Jackson, they believed him.

He ran off the trouble makers from the beach. He wasn't afraid of them, but it did take a while before they realized he wasn't backing down. He did kill a serial rapist on the beach once, testing the limits of his new life choice, but he only broke his neck. When the body washed up on the shore some miles down the way, the police were more pleased that the rapist was dead than caring to investigate too far into how the neck was broken before he was in the ocean.

I filled him in on my people and my supernatural world. He was intrigued that we were so strong and that we were protective of humans. It would be easy to use our skills to dominate others. I told him that there were a few in our historywho tried to take advantage of that, but it didn't end well for them.

Then we had more serious talk between us about how venom is poison to wolves. He asked questions about my wolf teeth and I asked him questions too. We would have to be careful with each other.

MmThen, he asked me to phase so he could see me as a wolf. I was nervous about it. There were many factors that worried me like his smell intensifying and how wolf me would react. I figured we better had figure this out so I stripped there and phased quickly like ripping off a bandaid.

He watched me phase with wide excited eyes. I could see the reverence in his face as he whispered, "How beautiful!" He reached out to stroke my fur and I stood still. I was still holding my breath. But I couldn't last much longer. I needed to breathe. I inhaled and was pleasantly surprised. His smell was still strong with the sweetness, but it didn't burn my nose like a vampire's smell normally does. I never spent time with the Cullen's so I didn't know if that had to do with the "vegetarian" life style or just that he was made for me.

I returned to my human form and dressed. I thought we might should wait til we knew each other a little better before we consummated our relationship. Usually imprints hadn't just met and there weren't so many psychological obstacles if they had. I wondered about talking to him about it but he saw my secret thoughts each time I thought to not say anything. He only said he could be patient for a little while, but he was planning on going back to Washington with me.

"I won't miss anymore time without you. It would be horrendous." He declared and I agreed wholeheartedly. I was so unbelievably happy that he wanted to go back with me.

Then I realized a problem. The pack would be concerned and divided. The law of imprints is absolute, but some of us are quite prejudiced.

"I will phase again and see if I can talk to my Alpha so that he will be prepared. Imprinting goes beyond everything. The rest of the pack will leave you alone as soon as they understand what has happened. When our mind link is complete they will know everything.

"Thankfully there didn't seem to be anyone phasing in the pack when I phased for you. They would have been terribly worried for us if they had seen you."

When I returned to human form, he pulled me into his arms and kissed me softly. "We have much to do before we go." He added, "I bet Bella will want to know how you are also."

"I'm almost sure she is only half as curious as her mother. She knows she will get the full story and she does know about imprinting. Renee will only get the less mythologically filled one."

I phased and found Seth and Jake to be the only ones on patrol. The others were doing other things. They got Sam for me and we talked. He seemed relieved for me on one hand and utterly confused on the other. It was hard to hide strong emotions from the mind link. We could keep something's private, though. He was overwhelmed with the whole "mortal enemies" issue also. He was going to gather the council before telling the rest of the pack. I phased back to human form.

I uncharacteristically skipped to Renee and Phil's place. Renee let me talk to Bella before bugging me about the details. All she asked was, "what did he say?" I told her he was coming back with me to Washington so we could get to know each other better. She smiled jubilantly before letting me pass to the bedroom where I found Bella curled in a tight ball. She must have been dreaming of Edward again.

I felt bad for her. After living with her for the past couple of months, I had come to realize that she was more than strongly attached to him. It was like seeing an imprint separated from her mate. I figured that was truly what the situation was akin to. I never felt more concerned for her than I did right then. I only had known my mate for 12 hours and the short separation was unbearable.

I couldn't understand how Edward could leave her. I could only conclude that he loved her too much to change her into a vampire. He had wanted to keep her human, because he felt so. I could see it clearly with my newly imprinted eyes.

I gently tapped her on the shoulder and sat down on her bed beside me. So many things had been happening. I had made friends with this strange girl who was in love with a vampire. At first she annoyed me so much, but she was kind to me even though I was very rude To her and everyone else. Then after my dad died, our parents started a relationship. We now had one more bond to share. We were both mated to vampires.

"Bella, I'm back."

"Hmmm?" She was groggy. "Oh, Leah, how'd it go?" She looked at me with her eyes clearing. "You're glowing!" She softly exclaimed.

"I am, Bella. I can't even tell you." I exhaled and inhaled deeply then closed my eyes. "He knew. He loves me too!"

"Wow, just like that!"

"Yes just like that." I opened my eyes to tell her more. "He can see secrets so it was easier than I thought it would be to start the conversation."

"Well, that explains it." She whispered.

"What. " I was confused.

"He kept looking at me with the same frustrated look Edward kept giving me when I first met him." She said and I was no less confused. I questioned her with my eyes.

"Oh, I guess I never told you." I shook my head no. She continued, "When I first met Edward, he kept giving me those same strange looks. He would squint his eyes as if trying to see through me. I later realized he could read minds, but he told me he couldn't read mine. I'm guessing William couldn't see my secrets either."

I laughed. Edward was indeed a gifted vampire. I thought back to my crazy train of thought earlier.

"So did he mention anything about that?" She asked.

"No, he didn't."

"Why the laugh then?

I had to explain the whole things and she laughed at my ludicrous string of irrational worries.

"He did say he wanted to talk to you about how you know about the supernatural world." I was supposed to tell her that as soon ask could work it into conversation anyway.

I stared off in thought for a bit. I reviewed all I had done since I shifted. How many vampires I had helped killed that had migrated and hunted around our homes. After we killed the two that were determined to kill Bella, some more came through looking for them. Apparently she had created back up to help her. She hadn't sought out Bella that day, just happened upon her in the woods.

Seattle was infested. We slowly killed several. Some were smart and high-tailed it out of the area. Some of them were weird and didn't even know the truth about themselves, believing the would turn to dust on the sun and such. I wondered how many of them even considered that they were being lied to. How could they blindly trust the monster that cold-heartedly changed them? I wondered how the Cullens came to their choices. I thought I should ask Bella sometime.

I laid back on the bed to dream of the future. My mind raced with endless possibilities. Unending love was so beyond my understanding. I had been so jealous of Sam and Emily. Now, my own eternal romance had opened for me. It would have to be more amazing than theirs.

I felt bad for Sam and the others with mortal imprints. I would get to keep him so much longer. As long as we kept to ourselves, we could live indefinitely. Emily would die.

Suddenly, in so many ways, my whole world had shifted.

 _ **A/N I'm gonna have to write something else for Leah so I can get to work with the frustrated her that is shown in the books. This event changes so much for her. I hated that she had to be left out of an ounce of joy with a forced front row seat to everyone else's HEA. It's no wonder she reacted as she did. Sometimes in RL we have to make the best of things. Wouldn't it be great if a fan fiction writer could just rewrite our stories with an HEA?**_

 _ **Thanks for your time!**_

 _ **JaelSarjenka**_


	10. Chapter 10 As Time Goes By

Chapter 10 As Time Goes By

Bella's POV

So, William planned to go with us to Washington. I wasn't at all surprised.

Renee was beside herself revelling in the young love she was witnessing develop before we left. She kept going on about how magical it all was. If she only knew.

I tried to ignore them as much as possible on the flights and layovers, but when they came up for air William would become a Chatty Kathy. He asked me my story about meeting the Cullens and my relationship with Edward. He had known about Alice's gift already as Emmett had made several comments about it, but he didn't know about Jasper's and Edward's talents.

Leah was surprised to hear of them all. I hadn't felt comfortable sharing with any of the pack. I hadn't felt right talking to them much at all about this kind of thing. I talked a few times with Jacob after I realized he was a wolf, but I never told him about any of this. Of course, I supposed that they would all know, now. This kind of information would be considered important. I felt a bit guilty about it, but I figured they would gain a great education about vampires from William. -Straight from him or via Leah.

We also discussed his inability to read me and what that might mean. He called me a "shield, " because my mind is protected like a shield would a warrior. I contemplated that for a bit. He seemed to be mulling it over as well, but I guessed he gave up too.

I asked him if he had met someone who smelled better than the rest. He said he hadn't but he knew others bragged about the high they achieved from killing them. He informed me that some referred to someone like that as a vampire's "singer," because their blood sings or calls to them.

He was surprised about the way the Cullens had simply left. He explained more about the Volturi to me than Edward had. He had only told me that only vampires who wanted to die would cross them. Apparently, the Cullens were now at risk of destruction because of Edward's decision to neither kill me nor turn me. It was against the Volturi's rules. They made the law and reinforced it, swiftly.

It made me feel that Rosalie must like me a little to put her existence at risk for me, or maybe that was about Edward. As long as the Volturi were unaware, they were fine, but with my luck...

As I was watching Leah get to know William, I was struck by the reality of the completeness that they were for each other. They were cemented to each other for ever. They would never part from each other for very long a span of time because they had found each other.

There was quite a stir upon our return. Sue and Seth had had enough time to be able to come to some level of acceptance of the imprinting. Sue greeted us warmly. She even hugged William. I couldn't believe it. I thought maybe she was happy that Leah was happy. Of course, understanding the premise of imprinting likely helped her.

Charlie was incredulous that Sue was so ready to understand the fairy tale "love at first sight" story that he was given. She only said, "Sometimes you know right away, sometimes love comes a bit more slowly" then she smiled and kissed him on the cheek. He eyed William suspiciously. I decided to be proud of him for having fatherly feelings and worry on Leah's behalf. Or maybe he noticed the similarity to the Cullens. He wasn't dumb.

Leah and William were determined to keep her part of the lease on our apartment. They paid up my rent and bought a secluded house nearer to the mountains. They were supposed to pay through the end of the lease, but William was a very sneaky vampire. He paid through my projected graduation with a couple months to spare. Leah finished the semester but planned to take time off. By tribal law, they were married when the imprinting happened, but they went to a Justice of the Peace so that Uncle Sam would be appeased as well.

The pack was still trying to figure out what then purpose of this was. Because of the pack's response Leah changed her mind about taking a break, continued culinary school, and graduated at the top of her class in order to show them she was making good decisions. She hoped those who were angry about the situation might be silenced by her strength and determination. Of course it had little affect on them. Stubborn people are difficult to sway one way or the other.

Three years of study passed for me, too, and I graduated. It had been a simple nose to the grindstone time. I enjoyed the subject I was studying. I knew I needed to look into graduate school to further my studies, but I wasn't sure where I wanted to go. I'd heard that it wasn't considered the best training for a person to stay in one learning institution. Of course opinion varies on that subject, but it seemed like a plausible excuse to give Charlie. I took the GRE's so that part was done, but I felt I should wait.

My intuition was telling me there needed to be a pause. I had volunteered hundreds of hours, raised funds for causes, travelled for summer mission trips with a campus ministry group (I helped dig a well for village on the African continent, even) and tutored kids at a local school. I had given a great deal of myself without having any huge calamities befall me. I thought I might need a break. I hadn't been taking my vacations. I had started working for a restaurant that a friend of Leah's opened. I was a busy chick. I thought it was more than just needing a break.

I almost didn't actually attend my graduation myself but when I mentioned that at Christmas, I was informed that seeing me walk across that stage was the right of those who had supported me. Everyone was planning to come: the pack, Charlie and Sue, Phil and Renee, and Leah and William.

Jake organized a party at a hotel convention room for me over spring break. He had some connection to the management there from the trade school he attended. He knew everything about mechanics already, being nearly a prodigy in the field (he thought), but a diploma or certificate to hang on your garage office wall did something to encourage folks who didn't know you. I thought he had done well to think ahead in such a manner. I also thought he had had tons of fun with it.

When the big day came, I couldn't believe my friends and family would really want to put themselves through the long drawn out ceremony. Well, it was more of a stand up and turn the tassel thing, but in a university as huge as this, it takes a long time. I still wished I just stayed home. Diplomas are often mailed anyway. Most of them did come and sit through the long list of names. I felt loved. I was tired, overwhelmed, and ready to get out of the stupid heels I chose to wear - even though they were a beautiful electric blue. They made me feel like Alice was near me.

My guests waited for me to sneak off to a restroom and brush my hair that the hat had mussed by the cap. I had stashed some flats in my bag just in case. I was right. Those heels were sitting shoes which were right for sitting. Once I had to walk, they needed to go. I switched them out.

As I walked out to look for them, I found them congregated a few feet away. As I approached, Quil patted me on the head, "Has anyone noticed she's like a little porcelain doll?"

Jake smiled and added, "Hmmh... I don't know. I think dolls might be sturdier."

Seth wrapped his arm around me and said, "Now, don't pick on my little sister, guys. That's my job." They all laughed. I was trying to behave nicely and not swat them all, though that would have hurt me worse than them.

Phil decided to save me, "Let's take her out somewhere special to eat so she can be picked on with a full tummy." I took what repreive I could get.

I got to pick so we went to the restaurant that Leah had worked in for a while, called "The Cliff Dive." It had two sides. One part was a dance club and the other side had a nice sit down atmosphere. They did not connect by anything more than the kitchen. Servers and menus were separate but the chef staff were the same. I never went over to the dance club side, so I couldn't even tell anyone about it when they asked while we were driving over. Dancing was still not something I was interested in. I was still l a bit too clumsy.

I rode over in Quil's car since Sue, Phil, and Renee filled Charlie's little Prius. He finally got a car that wasn't his work car (the cruiser) and settled on a pre-owned hybrid. It was burnt orange. It reminded me of a lighter auburn version of Jake as a wolf, just smaller.

Quil was very proud of his shiny white 1996 Chevy Baretta. It's outer door handle opened differently from other cars. He and Jake had fixed up as a class project at their trade school. It had been sitting in the rez's high school psychology teacher's back yard since his second was born. It had still worked then, but when his family went to using their mini van and small sedan all the time some of the inner workings that I know nothing about froze up or rusted or something. Jake and Quil had fun on the body work too. They bragged about how they made it look and sound show room worthy.

In Quil's Baretta (other than me) was Jake, Seth, and Embry. They all agreed that they were my date. The whole group of them. This meant they were planning to mercilessly tease me all evening long. They were my brothers.

Kim, Emily, Claire, and Billy were in the Rabbit that still was purring like a kitten with the good care it received all these years. The girls were going to take care of Billy and make sure he wasn't feeling unappreciated. He was still sullen about Charlie and Sue, but he was putting it aside for friendship's sake. He did truly care for the pair. He was just jealous. He was staving off becoming a crumugeon, though.

I sat in the back between Seth and Embry. They seemed intent on not allowing Jake to sit beside me. There was some strange tension between the four that I had no knowledge of the cause, unless it had to do with Jake's crush on me. He told me he was seeing someone, but he never told me her name or any other specifics. Since he was disinclined to share, I didn't pry. I wouldn't want anyone being nosey into my business.

I asked, "So, what happened with Leah and William? They really didn't give a good excuse. They said something about one of the shutters on the house being loose. I didn't think that was anything to stay home about."

They looked around at each other, except for Quil who seemed relieved to be driving. Seth finally said, "Sometimes I think it must just be weird to be married to a vampire and have to be worried about being in large crowds, afraid that he might eat somebody."

Was William having issues? Was he worried about someone smelling better than the others? Maybe it was better they didn't come. But something about all this seemed way off. It took them too long to come up with that.

We finally arrived at "The Cliff Dive" and Seth helped me out of the car. He looked at the others and said, "Should we take her cliff diving for real sometime?" I remembered seeing them that one time before Jake's change when we were trying out our motor cycles.

I responded as their mischievous grins grew, "You know guys, you are a bit more sturdy than I am and the lure of danger doesn't seem to be as much for me as it used to be. I haven't even ridden my bike in some time."

"Maybe you should try riding a wolf, then. That would be a bit safer," Jake interjected. Seth growled at the double entendre and stood between us. "I just meant that I know she enjoyed speed and I think we all know why. Not gonna say it right out." He raised his hands palm out in a peaceful gesture. "Bella, all I'm saying is that if you ever crave that feeling of wind on your face, anyone of us would be happy to provide you a safe means of satisfying it. And I'm always ready to ride bikes, too." He looked at Seth with an expression of innocence, "I'm being nice."

The others had arrived by then and we all went into be seated. We took up two large round tables. The servers were familiar with Seth and me. We had been here with Leah several times while she worked here. She had been a sous chef.

Now I wondered what those two would do with their endless time together. Perhaps they could open a mountain resort where they could cook for people together. A little bed and breakfast sounded quaint. What did they dream of? I really needed to see them. I planned to go as soon as I could. I just had to pack up my apartment before my lease was up and find something to do with myself.

What was I going to do with myself? It was the talk around the table. My degree gave me many possibilities, but more and more my thoughts were distracting me lately. I wanted to find him before too long. I was becoming impatient.

My answer to them? "I have a few leads out for jobs in my field. I have plenty of good references between the restaurant where I work, professors, and volunteer supervisors. But I'm thinking I'm gonna move my stuff to Dad's soon so I don't have to worry about things, if that's alright with you, Dad." He smiled and nodded as if that idea pleased him.

"What about grad school?" Billy asked. "Wouldn't that give you more choices for your future?"

"Sure, I've taken the Graduate Placement Exam already, I'm just not sure which one I want to go to. It seems prudent to save up a little money before I jump into that though."

Sue looked at me knowingly but didn't say anything. She knew my patience with destiny was wearing thin. I wondered if she had told anyone. Did anyone else know about her gift? I'm sure the others on the council did, but I wasn't sure about the others -especially those around this table. Billy had to know, but did Jake or Seth? I was almost certain Charlie did not know.

When the menus came around I looked at it. The mushroom ravioli nostalgically smacked me in the appetite, so that's what I ordered. I didn't think I paid much attention to the flavor of that order in my memory, but I was sure that this hadn't measured up. The night had not, anyway. The company while loving was leaving me empty.

When the boys dropped me off at my apartment (walking me in and playfully looking around for hidden scary things), I gave them a light hearted good-bye. "See you, soon." I vowed.

After an hour and a half or so I received a text from Seth. "Up for a talk?" I immediately called him.

"Is everything ok?" I asked as soon as he picked up. He laughed to assuage my fears, "Everything is ok here, I just wanted to check on you after Jake went on his double meaninged rant."

"Oh," I sighed, " Yeah, I'm ok, Seth, don't you worry about me."

"It's my job to worry about my sisters." He said

"And since Leah has William to protect her, I suppose you need to exercise your fraternal care more fully in my direction." I teased.

"Let's get this straight. It is my job to worry about you both until the end of time." He sounded concerned about something, though. "She worries about you and me too. It's a whole sibling thing. She taught it to me." He exhaled irritated at something. If whatever was bothering him was what drove him to call me, I'd talk till he felt like he could say what it was.

"I love you guys, too" I responded the best way I knew how.

"It's just that I could see the feelings you're pushing down when he pressed his agenda on you. I don't like that it makes you uncomfortable. You should be able to be free with your friends. Especially those who know you are still hurting." He spoke so soothingly. I thought he'd make a good therapist. We'd never broached this subject. I assumed that he had heard my conversations with Leah and Jake, probably even Quil when they were connected as a pack.

Leah told me they could hear each other's thoughts when I talked to William about Edward's gift. She wondered how I could stand him knowing my every thought. Then I explained how he couldn't hear me and William explained about his gift and he couldn't read me either.

"I haven't talked to you much about it Seth, but I guess I should tell someone. It's getting harder. I feel so torn apart inside. I made a decision to be stronger some time ago for myself as much as for my parents and now you all who love me." I breathed, "Its still fresh. I didn't think there would be anyway to move on. I'm not tempted remotely in any way by Jake. I thought once about lusting after him. I know how willing he'd be, but it's just not in me at all. I can't get past his warmth."

We were quiet for a few minutes. "I was surprised that he was acting like that, though. I thought he's been dating some chick somewhere for almost a year."

"Don't mention it." He groaned, "He's still seeing her, but it's not really a good relationship. They're just using each other to fill their... Uh... needs."

"Oh, gross Seth! Does he make you guys relive stuff?" I felt so sorry for everyone in the pack at that instant.

"You have no idea how terrible it is." He paused, "The others can't help it when they're so in love, but he kind of taunts us with it. As if it were on purpose. It's not been so bad lately. I'm just afraid he's gonna see her tonight and I'll have to see it tomorrow. I kind of think he uses it to block us out from something he doesn't want to share. I haven't a clue what that might be. It's always worse near your birthday."

I couldn't believe Jake was like that. I couldn't imagine what had brought him to the point that he would be like that. But then, as he saw it I had chosen a vampire over him. As I saw it, there had been no choice. I'd rather have Jake as my friend, anyway. I was glad I never succumbed to lusting after Jake. Everyone would know everything. How embarrassing would that be? I wouldn't be able to stand it. Especially if he was the type to make his friends watch his memories. That's kind of sick. What would my birthday have to do with anything? Probably it was coincidence. (Forget rule 39, Jethro.)

"Seth, I'm thinking of going to see Leah and William soon. Do you think that's a good idea?" He was quiet for a second too long making me worry, but he said, "I think Mom was close to begging you to go. She says that Leah needs you."

"What's going on Seth?" I asked, fear growing inside me by the instant.

"You're going to have to see for yourself, but Mom wanted me to call you to tell you that it's important. No imperative that you go soon. Before the week is out. I'm bound by alpha command to not tell any more than that. Mom thinks you have an answer or something. I've been taking my time to get to the point of this call because I was afraid you'd think it was crazy, especially because I can't tell you specific important details."

"You can't tell me? But Sue says it's important." I said gravely, "You tell Sue that there are few people's whose words I take as seriously as hers. I will wrap things up here quickly. Then I'll go as soon as I can. Do you have time to come help me?"

"I'll come now. If my alpha finds out what all my mom knows from me, he might find a way to slow you down. It's not all about Leah and William either." On that cryptic note, he hung up and I prepared my oversized couch for company.

 _ **A/N Sorry this update was so long coming. I practically rewrote this chapter twice and then split it in two. It's much better for it.**_

 _ **Thanks,**_

 _ **JaelSarjenka**_


	11. Chapter 11 As Fate Would Have It

Chapter 11 As Fate Would Have It

By Thursday, Seth and I had packed up my things and moved what we could to Charlie's. All the furniture could stay as it was until it would be moved to storage or to my next apartment. I had my luggage in my truck which was running better than ever since I let the guys use it as a project for their studies. They got bonus points from their instructor just for the sheer age of the thing. She paid special attention to it and requested first dibs on buying it no matter the condition when I was ready to sell it. Charlie and Jammett were happy Jammett was moving back in for a while.

I left as soon as I could for Leah and William's place. When I arrived at their beautiful home, I could not believe my eyes. Leah was pregnant, more pregnant than possible -accelerated. She was quite slim the last time I saw her, not more than a month before.

She found that her morning sickness or "all day sickness" was better if she shifted to her wolf-self and ate like a wolf. That is to say, baby half wolf/half-vampires seem to like their venison in the raw.

There could never have been a precedent to this. Vampires do not have babies. If they could, Esme and Rosalie would have found out how and had many. Leah asked me to stay with them to be moral support. The pack was not being as supportive as they should have been.

Since Leah had to phase so often, it wasn't long into the pregnancy that the pack found out through the pack mind. They weren't sure what to do about Leah and her baby. It sickened her to know the thoughts her pack brothers had about her baby. Of course, she was afraid, too. This was unchartered area here. There were no legends like this.

Some thought the child would be a monster and should be eliminated for the safety of the tribe. The others thought that since this was a result of an imprinted pair then only a stronger protector would be the result. I sided with that.

There was a rift in the pack which manifested itself through a second pack. Jacob was now an alpha since he and Seth led resistance against killing Leah and her baby. Some who disagreed still stayed with Sam out of loyalty to him, but the split in the pack was enough to make Sam rethink what he was planning. The council also agreed that since the pair was an imprinted couple that this must be destined to be. It was likely that the anger was because by the fact that the imprinting occurred at all -prejudice.

Sue was very supportive as her sixth sense told her that the baby was going to be fine. She was staying put to keep an eye on the situation there, though. She didn't trust the wolves at all in this situation, protectors or not. She was worried that since Jake was able to break free someone else might be able to as well. So that is why she had Seth send me in her stead. She wanted to be sure her voice on the council was heard. She knew I would care for Leah and her baby.

Of course, I also realized that William would know her secret. I asked him if he had asked her any more details. At that point he knew I knew about her talent. He raised his brow at me before saying, she would only say that she knew it would all turn out fine, especially if you were to come to stay with us.

I asked Leah more about the pack split. She only said that now she can only hear Jake's pack as she is allied with him or vice versa (how it would be seen depended on who would be talking, I thought). She said it was nice to not hear certain things. Paul, for one had rather explicit thoughts of how to handle her situation. It bothered her a great deal. It bothered the others also. Before the split, when he had gone into detail to make a suggestion how to kill her and William,

Sam thought about how he was possessed by an old spirit warrior from their legends who wasn't known for mercy. He was banned from their ranks after a rather disgusting event. He had butchered a friend and neighbor but claimed that the man had been negotiating with a Cold One for immortality with the lives of his neighboring families. The truth was known as they couldn't keep secrets from each other very well in spirit form. He thought very proudly how he had ended his minor feud with his neighbor. They all knew he was banished to live alone in the mountains. Somehow the magic was stripped from him.

I asked Leah, if Sam could strip the magic from Paul should he become more of a danger to the others. She was uncertain, because so much of the original magic had changed over the years. Now that their change was physical to physical instead of physical to spirit, no one was certain it would work. It hadn't been tried since.

I asked if there had ever been a split before. She informed me that there had never been so many that had phased before. There were more spirit warriors, but as far as the legends covered, there had only been one leader.

I wondered why there had been so many and she said that there had been more vampires to traverse through the area. She wouldn't explain more, saying it wasn't the time to tell yet. Then she took a nap.

All this new knowledge meshed with what Seth told me about "his alpha" made sense. But was Jake giving a blanket "don't -tell -anyone" about Leah's baby or was it specific to me? Why didn't he want me to know or be here? Oh, right. He was crazy about me too. He was afraid the baby would hurt me or something. I just didn't believe that something created out of such a love could be like that.

After I had been with them a couple of days and saw how everything was progressing, I suggested we go about finding Carlisle. Leah looked at me as if I were nuts.

"How would we do that? They do they're best to be sure no one can find them. We don't even know what names they are using. And why would they help me? Does 'mortal enemies' mean anything to you?" Leah had a laundry list of concern with this. I was chalking it up to pregnancy hormones. Wolf hormones are probably even stronger than a human's.

First, I pointed out that she was married to her "mortal enemy" and that she was being ludicrous, but in a way that didn't have her phasing and swiping at me. Then, I told them about the Denali's. They would have kept in contact with the Cullen's as they considered each other to be family.

William was more agreeable to my line of thinking. He was worried about Leah delivering also. This was kind of a new path. The next day, after watching Leah being rather miserable, William sighed, "Leah, it would make me feel better if we could just talk to Carlisle. I do know Emmett and our link to Bella has to mean something in our favor."

She acquiesced. But she demanded that I go with them. I thought it would be best to not upset the pregnant she-wolf that could literally bite my head off. So, we packed what we needed and prepared to leave.

Our main problem was that we didn't know the exact location of the Denali coven, but two of our number were good trackers. That had to help. William spent a short while studying a map and we left in the direction he felt was most likely. Leah and I slept for the greater part of our journey, while William drove. He woke us up and announced that it would be a good time for the little mother to hunt.

I got out of their silver SUV as she stripped in the back seat and climbed out to phase. As she did, I heard a hiss and a growl from behind me. One of the Denali's, I supposed for her golden eyes, appeared. She had long platinum blonde hair and a very angry face.

"Stop!" William cried.

"She's one of those wolves that killed my Laurent!" She roared. "I want my revenge. I want at least one of them to die!"

William called to me, "Bella, is Laurent the one who was with Victoria when she tried to kill you?"

"Yes." I answered realizing I needed to help my friend. "The wolves kept Victoria and him from killing me."

"They were in violation of the treaty with the Cullens." William added. "No one can hunt humans in that area. It is their duty to protect the humans."

More golden eyed vampires appeared. I couldn't remember their names through the fear of the situation. Three females- another blonde, a strawberry blonde, and a brunette that might have been Hispanic and a male that may have been of Mediterranean descent. The paleness made it difficult to be sure.

It was obvious that they had heard our conversation before they had gracefully halted before us in their protective stances next to the first blonde. They each quickly glanced at each of us taking stock of the situation before them.

"The Cullens?" The strawberry blonde one asked, "What do you know of the Cullens."

"My name is William. I am a friend of Emmett's. It was from him that I learned about their "vegetarian" vampire lifestyle and more humane way of living. We are looking for Carlisle as we need his help." William was glad for reprieve. They noticed his eyes. He was telling the truth.

"And the human?" The male was curious. "Why are you with her? Is it because of her gift?"

"She is Edward's mate. Neither will be content in life without the other." William explained. It wasn't time to clarify about my gift.

"Yes, we've heard about that." The brunette looked at me knowingly. She reminded me of Esme.

The strawberry blonde eyed me with curiosity, but she said nothing for the moment,

"And the wolf?" The first blonde vampire pressed.

"She is my mate. If you could promise her safety, she will phase back to her human form and we can explain more fully." He eyed the first blonde.

The strawberry blonde was the one to answer, "We will harm no one, today." The first blonde ran off in an explosion of anger. She wouldn't go against her sister's word, but she wasn't going to hang around either. Leah went into the brush and I followed with her clothes. She phased and dressed. As she emerged there was a collective gasp of the remaining coven as they saw her very round belly.

"As you see, time is running out for us. We'd like Carlisle's assistance." He added as the vampire women stared with a little jealousy. I'm sure they had had Rosalie's thoughts at some point. Procreation was not in the cards for vampires -or at least their women.

The strawberry blonde, after a pregnant pause, said, "Yes, I imagine there is no other specialist for this unique situation." She offered to drive us the rest of the way so that William could hold his expectant wife after such a stressful event. She introduced herself as "Tanya" and she seemed to not know which way to look -at the road, at Leah, or at me. I had a vague recollection of Emmett being silenced after mentioning her name before. I supposed I should make no assumptions about it without hearing the full story. If she was keeping a secret that William thought I should know about, he would tell me later.

When we arrived in the lavish lodge that looked like an ad for a ski resort lodge, I could hear the brisk sound of vampire speed talking. The male, who Tanya had introduced to us as Eleazer, had a phone in his hand.

He hung up and informed us that Carlisle was on his way along with almost everybody. The way he looked at me, I knew who would be missing. My heart.

William and Leah hunted together after the call. I stayed in the house of vampires. It was decorated differently from Esme's take on the Cullen home outside Forks. Pretty much everything was white, cream, and beige there. Here were warm brown tones accentuated with golden fringed red velvety curtains and satin pillows. There were animal skin rugs, leather couches and recliners, and brass fixtures. The logs of the structure were visible like a mountain resrot's walls should be.

I sat down on the couch and sighed. I prayed Carlisle could help her.

Tanya came in and sat be side me. She looked me over.

"Did Edward tell you anything about me?" She finally asked.

"Not much really. He mentioned you were pretty much the leader of this coven." I replied, uncertain of where she was going.

"I guess I never had a place in his heart. I had hoped, but leaving you has only been trouble for him."

I didn't know what to think at first. Should I worry about having to compete with a beautiful vampire or about what trouble Edward has had.

As always, Edward won.

"What kind of trouble has he had exactly?" I asked warily, pushing my securities out of my mind.

"I'm not sure. They haven't said expressly. I just know that they are worried about him and if he comes by, I am to call them immediately."

I put my head in my hands. I wasn't sure if I could hold myself together any longer. I certainly didn't need to fall apart in front of my possible rival. What was he up to? I had assumed if I took care of myself and tried to live without him, it would please him. I was confused.

Tanya watched my emotions play across my face and how my body reacted.

"You're not doing so well either, are you?" She pointed out astutely.

"I tried. I've hoped that as long as I make myself go on that he would be able to be happy." I had failed, hadn't I? Should have I searched for him sooner? I'm sure William would have helped me. Although, Leah may not have let him out of her sight long enough.

She drew nearer to me with sympathy. "He's a stupid male, Darling. He thinks he knows what is best for you. "

"I know. I know." My frustration was nearing the surface. "I realized very shortly after he left me that he thought it was better for me to live as a human than be his vampire equal." I stood up and began to pace. "I am not happy, Tanya." I confessed. "I have worked very hard trying to keep going for his sake, for my parents, and even for Leah. But I don't know how much more of this I can do." I slowly spinned to faced her, "I'm afraid I'm loosing myself as I live so much for these others. It's not like I am being selfless. No! I am utterly selfish! I keep hoping he will come back. That he will be proud of me. All these things I do are diversions from the pain. I tried to convince myself it would make me a better person, but all I am is impatient to see his face, to feel his cold embrace, and to hear his soothing voice."

"Shh, Sweet Girl, listen to me. His family is coming soon. After this strange crisis and miracle is over, we will all look for him." She stood to embrace me."We will find your heart. We owe it to both do you" I nodded in assent and let myself be hugged and comforted. I didn't know how she could possibly owe me, but I knew that many owed Edward and Alice for trouble their gifts had prevented. Perhaps he had done enough for both of us. Maybe it was just that she cared for him and wanted him and his family to be happy.

Leah and William soon returned and Carmen, the brunette and Eleazar's wife, led us upstairs to find places to rest. My room was next to Leah and William's. She and I both slept through the night.

The next morning, I heard a vehicle in the driveway and joined the others in my slow human pace to greet those who had come. Carlisle, Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett were at the door by the time I got there. I was so pleased to see them. I worked hard to not just run and hug them all. They weren't surprised to see me as Eleazar had told them I was with Leah and William. But they did seem happy. Emmett just wrapped his arms around me and picked me up to spin me. So exuberant! I held to him tightly as he remembered I was likely to be dizzy after. When he stopped he let me get my footing before stepping back.

"That was from Alice. Well, the hug was. The spinning was my own fun!" I smiled up at him and Rosalie who stood quietly beside him. She gave me a slight smile, but she was as reserved toward me as ever.

I saw their eyes were light topaz meaning they had all hunted before seeing me. Esme gave me a light motherly hug and a kiss on the head. Carlislle gripped my shoulder lightly while giving me a welcoming smile.

I introduced them to William and Leah, of course Emmett and Rosalie had already known William. They explained that Alice and Jasper stayed to coordinate things back where they were staying and that they too would soon be there. Carlisle was hungry to hear all about this miraculous occurrence. Nothing like this has ever happened before and he was hungry for the knowledge he could gain.

They had a trailer on the back of their truck that they unloaded. It had been filled with medical equipment. I wondered how they got everything there so fast. Apparently they flew across the country which only took hours and they had an array of medical equipment in a storage facility only a couple hours away. Carlisle was prepared to help in any devastating event that might befall the country. He had many such storage facilities well stocked across the northern US. Suddenly, the last appeal of living in the sunny south left me.

They removed the furniture from an extra bedroom and set it up like a hospital. After everything was hooked up and running, Carlisle asked Leah if he could check her over. She was reluctant about it but she agreed as William was about to burst with anxiety. They couldn't see anything through the sonogram. They couldn't use a needle to pierce her womb for a sample. It appeared that the placenta was made of supernaturally thick half vampire half wolf tissue.

Carlisle couldn't contain his enthusiasm. Emmett was worried. Would the baby be able to be contained? What would it be like? Would he need to protect the rest of us? These things had gone through all our minds at one point or another in some form or other, but was pushed out. He wished Edward and Jasper were there for all the gifts and help they would be.

Carlisle thought the delivery would be soon. She had only been pregnant for a month or so!

We were all sitting in the living room that evening listening to Emmett and William recap their time together. Just as Leah stood up to go to the bathroom, her water broke. William jumped to her side in a blur. Everyone stood at attention. Eleazar and Emmett went to boil water. It was a good errand for extraneous people, because a watched pot never boils, especially in Alaska.

Rosalie helped William carry Leah gently up the stairs. Esme set to cleaning up the amniotic fluids in the floor. The other vampire ladies went to work making sure there were clean towels and blankets for the baby.

As soon as she began to go into active labor, Emmett and the extraneous non-medical, shouldn't- be -around- any -kind -of -blood -vampires went out into the woods.

I was too engrossed in the birth of my godchild to wonder whatever they might do.

It seemed to be a good birth. Active labor only lasted 15 minutes before the wails of a tiny girl were filling the the house. Leah cried and William would have if he could have. After Carlisle checked her out, we passed her around. Everyone was in awe of her. She was absolutely beautiful! So like the two of them.

She had raven black hair and tan skin. Carlisle had used a flash light to look at her lightly iridescent skin. She was a plump round healthy baby with a lovely smile. She seemed more intelligent that human babies as she looked around with purpose. She already had teeth, but she was wise enough to not bite down as her mother nursed her. She latched on easily and let out a contented sigh as she was fed her first meal. She fell asleep soon after that.

We were all quite amazed and wondering if she would be content with milk or if she would want blood, since she was half vampire. Leah's body seemed to require some to grow her. Since she had teeth, I wondered how long it would be before she could hunt her own deer? Would the accelerated rate of growth continue now that she was born?

Alice and Jasper joined us just in time to enjoy the new innocent life. We all finally relaxed a little.

Leah seemed to be doing well, but Carlisle wanted to keep an eye on her. She appreciated his concern but wanted to be cleared to return home. It's one thing to be with your vampire husband and clearly another to be with extraneous others. She was convinced to stay a couple more days, just to be on the safe side.

She confided in me that the vampire stink was overwhelming. I remembered that she said William's scent though strong wasn't like other vampires'. She expected the cause to be that they were made for each other. Her scent didn't bother him as badly as the other wolves bothered him either, actually it kinda worked like pheromones on him. The other wolves' smell was a different matter. They just stank. There were many reasons they lived in their hidden mountain home away from her "brothers."

It appeared that Alice could not see wolves' futures nor their half-vampire children's. She said it made her visions staticky if she was looking at someone else's future while that person was near a wolf. She preferred to be near Leah or the baby as being next to a wolf or half-wolf seemed to block out her visions completely. Otherwise, she was getting headaches from the imperfect sight like a person trying to wear the wrong prescription glasses.

Since everyone else had flickering futures, she knew that in the long run we were all safe. From time to time she and Jasper would run off so she could try to see other things. It was unclear how something was about to happen. Decisions had to be made. She would share with us when she got a better picture.

Jasper told Leah that the baby exuded contentment in her arms and she was pleased. He said she had a generally congenial personality. We hoped that would be enough to assuage the fears of those who were overly worried about the baby being a killer. Although I'm not sure they would take the word of a vampire either.

After a long discussion, Leah and William announced that their sweet bundle of joy would be named Anneliese Joy. They chose Joy as her middle name because it was the sum total of their family at the moment. They both just thought the name Anneliese fit her.

Anneliese was so amazing. She was growing fast. After a few days of observing mother and child, Carlisle told them they could go back to their home. William promised to measure her daily and send the stats to Carlisle.

As they prepared to go home, I wasn't sure of what I wanted to do. Or rather, I didn't know if what I wanted to do would be accepted. I wanted to stay with the Cullens until they found Edward.


	12. Chapter 12 Lost and Found

_A/N Thank you all for taking time to read this little project of mine. This story has changed quite a bit from its inception and continues to surprise me. The next couple of chapters swing back into vampire world as we are trying to work toward blending the two worlds. I hope you enjoy._

 _JaelSarjenka_

Chapter 12 Lost and Found

Alice finally got around to telling everyone about what she was seeking in the future. She was looking to find Edward. For the time being it seemed he had submerged himself in water somewhere. She wasn't sure where because all that was around him was water, maybe an underwater cavern. It wasn't well lit.

Then she declared it was time that we spent a day together, just the two of us. We woke up early and she carried me off to the cabin that she and Jasper often go tobe alone. It was just a simple little mountain cabin with a bed and a table. It showed its age in the wood, but it had been well maintained. We spent the day reviewing what we had been doing over the past few years. She confessed to me that when she first couldn't see my future while I was spending all my time with the pack, she thought I had died. She figured out quickly that I wasn't dying because I would go in and out of "sight" but seemed fine. At first, though she panicked and almost called Edward. We both knew that would have brought unnecessary stress. Who knows how he would have responded? He was so dumb, he probably would have run off to commit suicide by Volturi.

She was concerned that so much of my alone time that she did see seemed to not be as happy as she hoped I would be, but she also had had glimpses of some of my work and studies that told her that I was functioning. She had been at odds with herself, it was hard for her to leave me as her best friend, but she felt compelled to comply with Edward's request to stay away. She owed him.

She and Jasper had argued when she wanted to come check on her. Jasper was being overly loyal to Edward, maybe a smidgen over-protective of Alice, and held a lot of guilt. He knew it was his actions at my birthday party that led Edward to make this drastic decision. I decided I should be sure to talk to him about forgiveness. I told her that I didn't hold anything against her.

While we talked, she played with my hair and dressed me up in various outfits she had brought with her. I had missed her so much that I was happy to let her. I think we both knew this mood wouldn't last so we were taking what we could get from me. We painted toes and she did my face. We even played a few rounds of various card games. We hugged and she held me as I cried when I reviewed the first part of after they left. I thought she might have cried too, were she able.

She listened to my wolf friend stories and I saw she was taking in everything. They had all been understanding about Leah, but that some of her kin and pack were ready to kill her and her unborn baby didn't sit well with anyone. The pack seemed volatile to vampires strengthening their prejudice.. My love for my pack family would help them all break their preconceived notions, I thought. It was helpful for me to share these stories with her. I could see that she was seeing them differently than the immature hot heads that she imagined. I would share with the others too. This wasn't about bad monsters hating each other. This was about people misunderstanding and making unfounded assumptions.

When the day was over, she brought me back to the Denali's home. There were delicious smells wafting around as we opened the door. Esme and Carmen had let their maternal instincts go over board and took advantage of some recipes William had shared while those of us that required sleep were unconscious. They had prepared a feast for me that rivaled any I had ever been part of before. I couldn't even identify all the roasted wild game set before me. There were also potatoes, cranberries, candied yams, cole slaw, spinach casserole, green beans, apples and carrots in juice with ginger, and more.

I graciously took the seat at the table that was offered to me, resisting the desire to beg them to take this all to a homeless shelter. My teary eyes met golden ones all around the table smiling at me. "Welcome, home, Bella." Carlisle decided those were the appropriate words. "Jasper guessed the emotions he was sensing from you was about asking if you could stay with us while we searched out Edward. It is our intention to find him and reunite you."

"Then we're gonna kick his butt." Emmett promised.

Once I was filled to over flowing, they set out portions for me to warm up for a couple of days. I didn't even have to suggest it, they wrapped up the rest and delivered it to a nearby soup kitchen that was expecting the food that Esme and Carmen had promised would be delivered in time for a late, but hot supper.

I was informed that I was not the first philanthropist in their midst. Jasper noting my pleasure in meal sharing told me that if I noticed that Alice didn't let them wear clothes more than once, then I should know that they share the clothes with shelters or charity shops like Goodwill.

I slept well that night with my tummy full and knowing how loved I was. I knew they hated the smell of food, but they all sat with me as I ate, easily engaging me with conversation. They overlooked that to keep me company for the evening.

We waited for Alice's visions to change at the Denali's home, because the Denali's wanted to help. I had become fast friend with each of them. I learned so much from each of them, especially Eleazar. He talked to me more about my "shield," as he and William called it. He could sense others' talents, no matter the species. He had been a talent scout for the Volturi at one time. He said they'd be interested in me. He wondered how it would grow after I was changed. He gave me many suggestions to work on after the change occurred.

It had moved to that kind of talk, "when" not "if" I would be changed. Even Rosalie had come to terms with it. She had seen how bereft Edward had been before he had wandered off to South America and she could see the damage done to me. Mine was a life half lived. Sure I had filled it with many activities to distract me, but like the writer of Ecclesiastes found, it was meaningless wind chasing.

I didn't want to change until after we found him. I thought the newborn madness as Jasper described would be a hindrance to me and the others as we searched from him. Carlisle had offered to do it and I almost took him up on it, but in the end my decision was the same. They did confirm that I may be less helpful at first and they may even have to take me away from some of them for protection.

Carlisle wondered if it might be different for me since I will already understand what's happening to me. I wasn't ready to test the hypothesis yet. Find Edward then change.

Since we had few clues to go by, we were relying on Alice's visions more heavily than usual. She still was just seeing him under water. He didn't do much other than swat little fish away from him or dislodge crustaceans from his pants. That imagery made Emmett die laughing. We all ended up catching the contagious laughter. We had been so serious that we hadn't even noticed how solemn we actually were being in our search. I was thankful for Emmett.

About a week before my birthday, she went into a trance. When she came back to realty she said he was going to the house in Forks, but she didn't know when. We decided to go there immediately to prepare. She made sure our decision wouldn't deter him. She saw him hesitate, but continue. The Denali's did not join us. It seemed their presence was unnecessary.

When we got there she had another vision of him coming out of the water and being spied on by children who thought he resembled Duskiya, the sea weed covered kidnapper of old Quilieute tales. They screamed and went past a sign, just along the boarder of Cullen territory. She thought it would happen soon.

I grew anxious for time to pass. I hoped this would be the time to be reunited and not the time of misunderstanding that Sue foretold. I decided to share with Alice about what she said. Her eyes twinkled as she laughed her lovely sing-song laugh. "I couldn't see the wolf but the wolf could see the vampire idiot!"

It was good to hear her make light of the situation. I hoped good fortune was with me.

Soon it was my 23rd birthday and Esme made me a cake. All my gifts were in pretty gift bags and covered in designer scarves instead of tissue paper or being wrapped with wrapping paper. Alice and Jasper gave me a new camera since I had had the same one since the last party. It was digital and had a multitude of settings for me to study. It didn't even come with a paper manual. I had to get it online. Emmett and Rosalie gave me a tablet so I could download the manual to the camera and read it. Esme and Carlisle gave me at satellite wifi hotspot so I could have internet access for my new tech toys wherever I go. Apparently, the camera was wifi too. I was thinking that I just needed a wifi printer and my portable office would be complete when the doorbell rang and one was delivered from the Denali's.

I was eating my sixth piece of cake (I started early in the day and it was homemade. Don't judge me!) when Edward came through the door. I saw what the children meant. His eyes were dark and fierce. There was still seaweed attached to his rotting clothes, though it appeared that he had run there and the speed had thrown some from his body, according to Alice. My pulse quickened as I wasn't certain if his monster could be controlled without hunting. He had told me once that it would be hard for him to be around me if we were parted of a length of time. His brothers met him before he could advance toward me.

Emmett kindly chided him,"Its time for a brotherly hunt and then we will hose you off before you defile Esme's nice clean floors. Bella will be pleased to have a nice chat with you after that, Bro. We will chat as we go." Edward looked at me and then at Emmett and nodded his head in assent.

I smiled inwardly and outwardly. This had to be the right time. Now all I had to do was wait for him to hunt. The next three hours were longer than the five last years combined.

Finally, Carlisle came in and met Esme in the kitchen where she was cooking for me. No matter how many times I tried to convince her that I was capable of cooking for myself, she shushed me and told me to let her cook for me because she couldn't cook for anyone else. I thought that soon I would take her with me to one of the soup kitchens. She would love caring for those folks. It was better than just delivering a meal and dropping it off of the run.

They were whispering, but I could make out that it was about Edward. Esme was upset about whatever it was he was telling her. Whatever it was they weren't telling me yet. They made their way to where I was not so patiently waiting in the living room.

Carlisle informed me that Emmett and Jasper were cleaning Edward up in the garage. Rosalie had a shower put in there so she could get degreased before coming into the white carpets. Also, it was helpful after messy hunting trips.

Alice sped by with clean clothes for him. Soon he came to stand before me. Even though I knew vampires don't age, Edward had somehow. It was the separation that had worn on him, I supposed. There were lines on his face, possibly from grimacing underwater.

We stared into each other's eyes an arm's length away. He was searching for something in mine. I hoped he was finding what he needed: love and forgiveness. When I couldn't wait any longer I slowly moved closer to him. He wrapped his arms around me and laid his cheek upon my head. Tears started streaming down my face as I said, "It has been too long since you've been home."

He rasped out, "I'm home. I'm truly home." And neither of us meant the house or Forks. We were at home in our embrace.

The others had left us to have our reunion time and so we could lay it all out on the table. We discussed everything about how he had lied about not caring for me and how I disbelieved. I did not mention the tea leaves, yet. There was one question in the forefront of my mind. When was the first time he had come back and what was the misunderstanding? How could I work that in? I just asked how he had passed the time. He told me about staying in a farmhouse in South America for about a year and then he decided to come back to me.

"I came back on your nineteenth birthday. Your dad had sent you off for a day of beauty. Jacob Black met me behind your house in the woods to send me away, because I had damaged you so much." I could hear the emotion in his voice. "I couldn't help but agree with him. I didn't know if he knew I could read his mind or not, but his memories of you were enough to break me. We made a deal that he would try to court you to save you."

"You made a deal about me like that?" I was livid. Could he have been more controlling? More caveman?

"I may not have been the sanest I have ever been at that moment, Bella." He looked for understanding somewhere under my angry face. I begrudgingly gave it even though the whole affair had a chauvinistic bend on it that I didn't like at all. However, a person in love often makes huge oversights for the object of his or her affection. I was about to overlook Mt Everest. I didn't care about the pain of him leaving anymore. I knew we couldn't be separated again. Forgiveness was way too important for me to skimp on here. I could see he had already suffered for his idiocy. It would be self-harm to punish him further, I wouldn't be able to take it. I needed my obstinacy in that moment as much as he did.

"After that, I kind of ran off growling into the woods until I found a cave to hide in." He confessed.

I didn't really know how to respond to this. I almost wished more time had passed so that I might have had more psychological training to help him. An undergraduate degree really didn't prepare me for this. He had suffered needlessly. I sat quietly, waiting to see if he had more to say.

"I was supposed to meet him the day after your birthday every year for him to share happy memories of you." I looked at him incredulously at him as he continued. "These past few years have been hard. He has been relating stories about him and you together."

"What about your marine hideout?" I asked him. I couldn't think of any memories of Jake that should set him off like that.

"Yes, well, I think I know that at some point he learned I could read minds because last year he hurled a memory of making love with you at me." He answered quietly. His face was contorted into a horrible painful grimace.

"He what!?" I was about to blow a vein in my forehead that I didn't know was there. I stood with fists clenched. "How could he have a memory of something that has never happened?" He lifted his head to see my dismay and anger. He had a moment of confusion and the understanding crossed his face.

"It is possible for someone to lie in their thoughts." He put his head down. "I shouldn't have doubted you, but it was such a vivid memory. And really it's what he was hoping to get from you in the beginning."

"In his dreams!" I shouted.

"That's probably it. It was probably the memory of a dream he had." He surmised.

I shuddered at the thought. "I knew he was persistent, but this is terrible! Jake is like a brother to me. I couldn't. Ick!" I looked him in the eye as I shuddered. Perhaps it was best to change the subject, "But you haven't told me about your time as a sea monster."

He laughed. "Well, after Jake showed me that, I ran across the treaty line without a care and flung myself into the sea. I found an underwater cave and sat still for about a year. Except, I got one nosey shark. There were also some bothersome fish."

I laughed at that. I climbed into his lap and enjoyed his embrace. I had missed his cold steely arms.

He commented, "I guess you managed better than I did."

I sighed, "I didn't at first. My parents were gonna have me committed. I tried hard to go through the motions but I was in a stupor. One day, Charlie threatened to send me to my mother. I was afraid I would never see you again if I left. So I tried harder. I made friends with Jake. He was wanting more than I could give, but stayed my friend after I turned him down, repeatedly." I sighed. "I had this day where I realized that my parents' love for me is a true love and I shouldn't discount that. I let it heal me to the extent it could. I decided I would be the strongest person I could be -not for them or even for you, although it was for all of you at the same time, sort of. I needed to try to be strong for myself. I started looking outside myself, helping others. It was rewarding and healing, too. I wanted to be as whole as I could be so that when you would come back, I'd be here. I wanted to be able to tell you that I had tried for your benefit and mine. It wasn't easy and I failed a lot. I would slip into mini depressions, but it wasn't as bad, because I had hope."

He looked at me with guilt and awe mingled on his face, "How did you know that I would come back?"

"At first I wasn't sure, but as I became more determined to do more than survive, I started realizing that the bond of our love would bring you back." I decided to tell him about Sue, "Also, one day, Sue gave me some tea." I kind of rushed the words, but he understood them.

He looked at me curiously, "And?"

"She can read leaves. She told me I would miss you the first time you returned, but you would come back and we would be together forever. She advised me to enjoy my mortal friends and opportunities as a gift from you, so that when you came back you would have no doubt that our spirit bond is real. Our souls are bound by love." I snuggled into him, almost afraid to know his response to my fairy tale talk.

He just held me as he silently contemplated my words. We sat silently for an hour or so. We caressed and kissed and memorized the lines on each other's faces though there was no need. There would not be a day that I wouldn't see him if I had my way.

The most ridiculous thing popped in my head, but then it made since. We had waited long enough. I pushed back from him and looked deeply in his eyes.

"Will you marry me?" I asked him with all the sincerity I possessed. I had so many things I could say that would be totally flowery and romantic, but I thought simple would be best. I could have been harsh and made him ask me, which after all this he probably would have seconded guessed me into my grave. I wasn't gonna let it get that far away from me. I was taking control.

"Just set a date and I'll be there!" He exclaimed. Then he furrowed his brow, "Are you sure about me? I'm the biggest idiot in history!"

I pursed my lips and answered, "I forgave you long ago. I knew you were obstinate and stubborn, though I didn't know how much. The bottom line is I am not whole without you and I don't want to spend any more time away from you. I've tried to exist away from you. I know that I can survive without you, but I don't want to live without you with me Every day for the rest of forever."

He carried me to his room where he dug out his mother's ring from a drawer and placed it on my finger.

"I could not be prouder than this moment." He whispered in my ear huskily. I wrapped my arms around him and said, "Let nothing part us ever again!"

"Not me nor my stubbornness," he vowed. Then we kissed each other senseless.


	13. Chapter 13 Mr and Mrs

Chapter 13 Mr and Mrs...

We had to tell Charlie two things. One, Edward was back and two, we were getting married.

I called Sue first. She asked for a couple of days to prepare him. She thought she could get him into a pretty good place of acceptance before the revelations were made.

Two days later, Edward and I visited Charlie with our fingers interlaced. As he opened the door various emotions played across his face. He settled his eyes on my face and I hope my visage could convey the truth of love and contentment that was there. He sighed and let us in.

"Sue said you'd be coming today." He began. "We had a long talk about soul mates." He looked from me to our laced fingers to Edward. "I understand the pain he left you in was caused by loosing your other half. Sue has convinced me about soul mates. And I'm gonna beat you to the end of the conversation."

Edward was smiling a beautiful smile that let me know everything was ok. Of course he was prepared for the next thing that Charlie was about to say. I wasn't completely surprised when he said it. I just wasn't ready for him to switch gears like this.

"Sue and I have decided to get married." I was joyous on their behalf. "You're the first to know as we expect similar news from you. She thought you would be coming here to tell me, or us, that you were getting married, too." He waited expectantly for one of us to speak.

Edward was the first to speak, "Congratulations, Charlie. I'm sure you will be very happy with Sue." Charlie nodded at him and he continued, "I would ask you for Bella's hand but we are becoming an untraditional couple. She has asked ME to marry HER. When I came back I practically threw myself at her feet hoping for forgiveness and she restored me to completion. We talked for a long time about how terrible it was to be apart and how I had been relying on Jacob Black's word that she was fine, maybe even better, without me."

"Wait, you've been talking to Jake all this time?" Charlie interrupted disbelieving.

"Yes sir, I knew him to be a good friend of Bella's and took his advice to heart," Edward explained.

"You, idiot!" Charlie exclaimed, "Jake has been wanting Bella for himself since he realized she was a girl. You couldn't rely on him to be a partial, non-biased advisor on her behalf." He laughed to himself.

"I have behaved as an fool in many ways regarding Bella. My whole family has not let me forget that. Alice particularly calls me an idiot as often as she can. She hated that I wouldn't even let her call Bella. I thought it would hurt her to keep hearing from us."

"She hurt plenty from not hearing from any of you. Who wouldn't be devastated to loose such good friends, Edward." Charlie looked him in the eyes. "I trust that you've grown up some, son, in the past few years. Bella here has become a strong young woman. I don't know that she would have with you around. It's not good for a girl to go from her father's home to her husband's without finding the strength of having her own first. She has grown in intellect and heart. She is hard working and conscientious of others in a way that she was not before you left. I think it was in her favor that she left. She can be your equal in so many ways. Perhaps she can even best you."

Edward and I smiled at each other as he spoke to us and through us. It was best that we were separated. It wasn't just mortality that was a chasm between us. How could a teenager fathom the life of a century old vampire? We might be facing ten years of bloodlust on my part in which case, we might not be on the same footing at all as we began our new life.

I did need to choose to see things as Sue had advised so many years ago. This time was a gift for me. Perhaps not so much for Edward as he certainly suffered for me to have time with my mortal friends, but then I did find more less mortals to be with and learn from.

After we were all quiet in thought for a couple of minutes, Charlie addressed Edward again, "It is her decision to marry you. I can't give her to you as she is definitely an independent and stubborn person. I'm kind of proud of that. I will say that if you will pay attention to the vows you will make before you make them, your marriage will be blessed by you, yourselves. You will promise to take each other as you are and what you will be. That you will be with each other in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer, for better or for worse until death parts you. Marriage is not for chumps or fair weather only people. Those people who make it forever have figured out that it's a daily choice. You must choose to love him when he leaves stinky socks in the floor, puts a red sock in your whites, or burns the spaghetti. You must choose to love her when she is working long hours and doesn't come home until after dinner time." I liked how he was gender bending our responsibilities. "No, I really don't know this from my own experience as Renee needed more than I knew how to give. I know I made mistakes and was a fool not to follow her. What did I really have to stay here for? Stubbornness and pride. It wasn't worth it. I'm gonna do better than that with Sue," he vowed. "I have seen it through others, though. Billy and Sarah were a wonderful example as were Harry and Sue. Love has to be unconditional. But that doesn't meant you can be an idiot about things all the time, Edward. This is my girl and if I find that you have been unfaithful to her or damaging in any other way... Well. Just remember I know a thing or two about forensics and how to make a body disappear.

Edward smiled at Charlie and promised solemnly, "Be it to me as you have said and more severely, should I make her unhappy or should I forget that she is my reason for going through each and every day." The shook hands and Charlie hugged me.

We heard a car in the driveway, "That would be Sue, now. I knew she would want to be here." Charlie said smiling and Edward nodded. I assumed he had read Sue's mind and was unconsciously confirming what Charlie had said.

Sue burst in the door, "Has it all been said yet?"

I just grabbed her and hugged her saying, "Congratulations!" She returned the same greeting. She had soup in the crockpot and we all ate some (except Edward who just kept looking at me adoringly).

We all established we had no set dates as of yet. As Sue looked out the kitchen window, a smile grew on Edward's face As he previewed what she was about to propose. Sue began cautiously, "What do you think of a double wedding?"

All around the table we each exchanged looks as we each thought about what we wanted. I decided to be the brave one and said, "I think that would be very special." The other three smiled in acceptance. I assumed they had agreed before I did and I was the one to convince, though they wouldn't have known Edward would have known. Well, maybe Sue did. I wasn't sure on that at the moment.

After while, I was ready to leave and I told them I would return before long to sleep there. We were going to the Cullens to share our story of the evening and listen to Alice squeal. I knew it was coming. It was a wedding after all. Why wouldn't she be crazy about putting together a festive event?

On our way back there I broached a subject that crossed my mind as I had considered the ten years of possible bloodlust. "Edward, about our honeymoon, I have a request."

"Anything your heart desires, my love," he promised.

"I want to be human for a while so I can truly make love to you without the blindness of bloodlust interfering." I knew what I wanted I knew this would be hard for him to give to me.

"I don't know if I can. Am I strong enough?" He worried.

"If you were strong enough to stay away and let Jake pretend to court me, I'd say you're strong enough. Plus, while I was in college I took courses in Marriage and Family. I was required to read the Kama Sutra." His sharp intake was startling, but I continued, "I don't know if you've ever read it, but it's so much more than what most people think. It's not just a handbook of positions. That's really just one chapter, but it is a handbook of many things, how to set up your home decor, how to be well-rounded in many skills so you can attract a spouse, and it does have advice for the first time. Perhaps if we each read that, I'm sure you could very quickly on the trip to wherever we go or even while I was changing for travel clothes into something more... Comfortable..." I wanted to say that part like they do in the movies and I winked at him. "Perhaps we could find a way that would be safe. I have ideas, but I don't know that we should quite discuss them yet." I wasn't sure if he was really listening to me, but I pretended that he was.

"I'm just not sure, Bella. I could kill you," he said sadly.

"Just think about it. We could try and if it's too much, we could stop. You excel in running from hurting me. I trust you." He groaned and as we pulled into the garage at his home he leaned his forehead on the steering wheel.

"I'm not sure I'm willing to take the chance. I can wait through ten years of bloodlust, though I'm certain that is an exaggeration."

I countered, "Look here, honey. You made me wait for you to show up for some five years. You think I'm willing to take the gamble that I could be a virgin for another ten years? I don't think so. You'll be lucky if I can keep my hands off you the next moment we're alone. I thought waiting until we were legally bound to each other in mortal terms would be compromise enough."

"You'd seduce me tonight?" He asked incredulously.

I reached into my purse and pulled out a tiny see through scarlet nighty with tags on it that I had bought with my graduation money in hopes that his return would be soon. I had snuck away to use the restroom before I left Charlie's and went across the hall to my room to get it out of the bag in my closet. "I'm very ready to do so, Mr. Cullen"

"Fine. We will try away from listening ears and the guffaws that surely you can hear by now since you're cheeks are crimson," he acquiesced. Then he whispered so quietly I could barely hear. "I do want to wait for our honeymoon as being a virgin until marriage means something to me. I've seen many relationships fail over sex. I don't want ours to be in that number. Call it God's blessing, call it superstitious, call it old fashioned, or whatever you want. I just want to be bound to you in every way before I express my love to you in that way. I will try as you desire as long as you promise to warn me at the first sign of pain."

I smiled in victory, though I was indeed embarrassed that the others had heard my plans.

As we walked in, Rosalie elbowed Emmett in the ribs and told him to be silent. He tried his best, but I had given him too much to laugh about, the immature thing that he was. He finally calmed down as Edward glared at him.

Alice sat bouncing as she waited for us to tell everyone what she had already seen we would. Then she begged for us to let her plan out everything. I suggested she make up a proposal to give to us, as well as Charlie and Sue, so that they could give an ok, to her meddling... or... planning.

She reigned herself in but threw herself into detailed drawings that she presented to us at Charlie's table. Her exuberance was catching and before long we didn't even have to say that we agreed to what she wanted. She drawn us into her web and she did a happy dance. (For some reason I have an image of elephants dancing, "...They had such enormous fun, they called for another elephant to come... Which is funny because Alice is so tiny and the antithesis of an elephant except for her enormous strength.)

I was fascinated as Sue accepted the hyper little vampire for all she was as her friend. She was a little nervous at first, but she calmed herself quickly as she saw the person inside the marble body.

Alice, being a very able supernatural creature, got everything together in weeks. We were able to get married by the end of October at Angela's father's church. It was unlikely that the weather would comply for us to have an outdoor ceremony.

It was a beautiful wedding. We decided to do things a little differently in regards to attendants. Leah and Seth stood centrally while I was on the right of them and Sue was on their left, since we shared them as family, at least in heart, already. Alice and Emmett stood on the outside by Edward while Billy and Renee stood by Charlie. I doubted there had ever been such a meaningful expression of love ever before than what stood across the front of that church that morning.

There were Christian elements and Quilieute elements woven into the ceremony. Old Quil said some things and blessed the pair in their native tongue before both sets of us made our promises to each other. I didn't understand it, but it sounded beautiful.

After all our vows were made, each pair of us left in varying manners. First, Renee pushed Billy exited with a snippet of Nat King Cole's "Let There Be Love." Then Alice and Emmett danced out to KISS' "I Was Made For Lovin' You." It was my request, because that's how I felt about the relationship between Edward and me. Seth and Leah did a cute pantomime to Sunrise, Sunset to leave the sanctuary. Charlie and Sue walked out with their hands joined as "When a Man Loves a Woman" played. Then as Shania Twain's voice started to sing "From the Moment On," Edward picked me up and carried me down the aisle, eyes on me as we felt the meaning of the words. Especially,"... I give my last breath" was impressed on my mind.

We enjoyed an awesome and fun reception in the fellowship hall. We danced with our extended families, even the wolves joined in the fun. They were softening towards the Cullens because of Leah's little family.

It also seemed to be a good sign to them that William and the Cullens didn't balk at entering a church. The vampires even seemed to be at peace there, especially Carlisle who never kept his spirituality a secret. He wouldn't do well in a severely legalistic denomination, but he would fit right in with some more liberal groups of Christians. Nearly four centuries had let him see more of God than theologians normally were gifted with. He and Esme has slipped out of the reception for a few minutes. I imagined that he would want to go pray. There had been so much that had transpired recently, it did seem to be an appropriate thing for him to do. It would fit in with his personality.

Emmett and Rosalie held Annaliese, though Emmett kept calling her "A. J.," even though her parents didn't particularly like it. Edward explained that "A.J." liked it and she held some ability to make someone behave or talk as they truly desired. In this case, she compelled him to use the little nickname that she liked. She loved Uncle Emmy and Auntie Rosie, as they referred to themselves. Jasper had already confirmed she was a very loving little individual. The whole room had to find time to hold her through the entire ordeal. Renee and Phil had been told that she was a foster child that was living with them for a few months. She would look differently the next time they saw each other. She would be introduced as a different child to them then and to the others who were there and weren't part of the secrets.

As the night ended, Alice ushered Sue and me to the Bridal room to change into travelling clothes. Carlisle and Esme had given them a honeymoon at an all-inclusive resort in Hawaii. They would be there in time for a big whale migration time. Not that being so close to the ocean, they hadn't seen whales before. It would be different to be warm while seeing them!

Sue had worn a cream colored dress that was just right for her matronly figure. Her long hair was loose except for a mother of pearl comb that had been passed down through Harry's family. It was her old and she even saw it as borrowed since she was marrying someone who was not a part of the Clearwater family. She was borrowing their tradition and expecting Harry's blessing, too. She knew he only lived for her happiness. And fishing. That was something he and Charlie shared. At least that part of life with Charlie would be known already to her. The rest, she'd learn.

I had worn a simple white dress that Alice had designed and sewed herself with Esme and Rosalie's imput. I couldn't have found a better dress. It was made for me. It was a simple white gown overlaid with fine lace. There were pearls and crystals sown in an unknown pattern.

My hair was pulled up in an intricate up-do that Alice and Rosalie worked to get her to ensure would stay upheld by a single comb that Charlie gave me that was his grandmothers and Renee had added sapphires to. Old, new, and blue was there. I borrowed a sapphire jewelry set from Alice to match the jewels in my comb. I had switched from my heels to electic blue flats before we started dancing. They also went well with my traveling clothes that were also blue.

I didn't know where I'd be going with Edward for our honeymoon. He hadn't let me know. I trusted that he would have planned everything, paying attention to great detail that I should be comfortable, content, and safe.


	14. Chapter 14 New

_**Disclaimer: I may forget to place a disclaimer, but I will never forget that I do not have any claim to the Cullen fortune or Stephenie Meyer's royalties from any part of Twilight. It bums me out a little.**_

Chapter 14 New

We left out of port from somewhere just south of Seattle on a cruise ship. I was distracted by many things. The main thing going through my mind was that I was worried about sea sickness. Edward tried to dispel my fears by saying he thought I'd be fine since I'd been doing better when he ran with me. I wondered if he chose the ship, because he was afraid of trying to make love with me. When we were alone I asked him about it.

He explained, "I took your advice and read the Kama Sutra before I started planning, hoping that it would give me as good advice as you proclaimed it would. You were right. It was more than what my prudish mind thought. I paid attention to the specifics of the first time and certainly it does have good advice for humans. In addition I have reviewed a few textbooks that Carlisle had that I had placed little import on, but he recommended when I asked.

I am not sure what to expect of myself, but I think we can try. I wanted to spend this time on the cruise to our destination to work up to things a bit more. Since the wedding came along quickly after I returned, we haven't had much chance to explore each other as we might have had we give ourselves more time. We will work up to things and then we will try in earnest when we get to the place I am taking you. I promise."

I thought about him talking to Carlisle. I'm certain that Carlisle was the best to seek advise from, but it embarrassed me so. Perhaps more so since the events were coming so eminent. He seemed to sense that I was over thinking things (we were both good at that, obviously). He knew how to distance me from my ruminations.

He started to kiss me and we made up for lost time. Truly we hadn't had much time without Alice intruding with wedding plans. Also, the guys made Edward hunt almost daily to prepare for our time together since we had been separated for so long. We had only been back together for a few weeks.

We spent most of the cruise exploring each others' bodies. It was very pleasant, but I was impatient to get to wherever we were going. I still didn't know our destination..

I was surprised when we arrived at Isle Esme off the coast of Brazil after docking on the mainland and taking a speedboat. It was a gift from Carlisle to Esme. What a generous gift! I wondered how I would ever reign in Edward with such an influence. He was always trying to buy me something.

Though he was pleased that I had the foresight to have my hymen broken after we decided to get married so there would be no tempting blood, he was angry that my body ended up bruised from our first try. I was certain that practice would help us know how to please each other without those consequences. He disagreed, being certain that it would only get worse. He did everything he could to keep me otherwise occupied. I was drained of energy from the daily activities he planned. Such stubbornness I was matched for.

After two and a half weeks of pleading and shameless attempts at seducing him, he finally gave in. After the second time proved he could be more gentle with me, he agreed that trying to practice more frequently might help. In the mean time I had researched positions that might be less injurious to me. Emmett had hidden a book in my luggage before we left. I found it to be a great resource. We were enjoying each other quite a bit more, even though he kept being conscientious of my delicate state.

He left me one night while I slept to go hunting. I was awakened by the heat and strange dreams that made me restless. I couldn't make sense of them. There were only vibrant colors and shapes like a stained glass work done by an abstract artist. My emotions were high from them and I couldn't understand why.

I wondered briefly what my dreams were telling me. I remembered a speaker that I heard while in college say that in dream interpretation the strongest emotion you recollect is the one your subconscious is working out. Since it was a pleasant high, perhaps I was trying to catch up with my joy of being with Edward? That didn't seem to make sense.

I got up to take a cold bath. It refreshed me and calmed me down. I reviewed the enjoyable time Edward and I were having alone. My stomach growled and I made a sandwich. There was some left over chicken that I reheated and placed on bread that I had spread with mayonnaise. After a few bites I thought it tasted disgusting and then my stomach lurched and I ran as my stomach rejected all I had eaten. After I washed my face and brushed my teeth, I checked the date on the mayonnaise jar. The date was still good, but when I lifted it to smell it, the nausea returned. I dropped the jar into the trash. It had obviously gone bad.

I went back into the bedroom and turned on the ceiling fan. I had brought a zipper sealed bag of ice with me to help cool me. I laid down in the middle and stretched so my limbs wouldn't touch each other to hold in heat. I quickly fell asleep again.

When I awoke, the bag of ice was gone and Edward had returned holding me. I had slept better. I asked him about his trip and he told me about his hunting. I told him about how I had gotten sick. Actually, while I was talking, my stomach wasn't doing too well again. I had to run to the bathroom quickly. I thought I should take some medicine. While rummaging through my luggage I had a passing thought about my period being due soon. Then I pulled that thought to the forefront, because I was then thinking it was passed time -well passed time. I had never been late or missed before.

Edward had walked out to get some more ice in a bag while I was searching for an anti-nausea medicine he returned to find me looking at myself in the full length mirror where, to my astonishment, I had found my belly was protruding in a manner it hadn't prior to our wedding. I remembered admiring my flat abdomen as I looked at myself in my wedding dress. It was no longer so flat.

He gasped. "What?"

I felt a tiny nudging, that shouldn't be there. I wondered if I was my imagination or gas, but as I placed my hand over it, it happened again. We looked at each other. He was shaking his head in denial.

We both had realized I was pregnant. He was shocked and afraid. He arranged for us to return to Washington immediately. I was so confused, because I was certain the doctors told me I could never become pregnant. I supposed it might have to do with his vampire seminal fluids. It must have broken through the damage or healed it. I thought Carlisle would find it intriguing.

I called Rosalie first since he was so erratic. I thought I might need her help with him. I knew she would understand my love for this baby. she could explain it right for me. I no longer had the words. She would meet us at the airport.

Then I called Leah and William and asked them to meet us at the house. They brought Anneliese with them. It had only been a few months, but she already looked two.

Who knew a vampire male could impregnate anyone. Here were two examples in the same room.

Boy, was Rosalie pleased! She loved playing with Anneliese and looked forward to playing with my baby too.

Edward was terrified. He was afraid I was a bit too mortal.

Soon I couldn't keep down any of my food. Leah suggested I try raw food since she craved deer when she was expecting. I did like sashimi, but as far as I knew a pregnant woman wasn't supposed to have that, but since I wasn't having a fully human baby, Alice and Esme ran out to Seattle to find a supplier. They were keeping me in good supply since it worked. Well, it did for about a week and a half. Then I couldn't keep that down either. We tried raw steak straight from a butcher, but it wasn't quite right. Leah and Rosalie caught a fresh deer for me, I ate it. It was a fresh kill and would have made me sick before this. That worked for a few days too, but then my body stopped cooperating with any raw meat, even. I was getting sick and I feared for our baby.

Jacob realized I was in town and stopped by to playfully argue for old time's sake. He saw my unhealthful condition and thought "the thing" probably wanted blood. Edward was listening to his thoughts, and for once I was pleased, because once they brought me a cup filled with blood, I felt much better. Both the baby and I were healing. He or she was growing steadily and quickly like Anneliese had inside Leah.

I thought there would have been more panic if not for their precedence. They realized they would have to preform a modified c-section as my body probably wouldn't be able to handle full birth like Leah's did. She was a little more sturdy than I. This baby was already breaking my bones, which was wearing on Edward.

I held off the desire to smack Jacob for his faux memory sharing, since he had inadvertently saved our lives. I probably would only injure myself, anyway. I'd find a way to get even some day. He should probably have worried about that considering he knew I would soon be indestructible.

The wolves knew what was going on. I thought that might be a secondary reason for Jake's visit. I was giving him the benefit of the doubt. Surely that wasn't his primary objective.

Jacob started to hang around more. No one was sure why. He obviously hated being around us, well the vampire part of my family anyway. I wasn't sure if he was trying to be my friend or watching for signs of trouble with my family. Edward had said it didn't seem to him that Jacob understood either.

One afternoon, Edward heard the baby's thoughts. The baby didn't know from male or female so it didn't help with that, but they were able to talk about what movements were hurting me. It also made it clear that the time for delivery would be sooner than later.

Thankfully, Carlisle had no impediments for getting any supplies, so they readied the upstairs office as a delivery/operating room at vampire speed. That only took a couple of hours instead of the days that it would have taken humans. They prepped me and it was time to deliver my precious bundle of joy.

They put up a curtain so I couldn't see below my chest. I felt the pressure and heard a keaning noise as one of them liberated the baby from the protective placenta that had been created for him or her. I heard Edward say with a smile in his voice, "How beautiful!"

I begged, "Let me see." He wrapped the baby and let me see it was a girl. I cried tears of joy, "Renesmee!"

Around the house the repeated "Renesmee?" rang out. I guessed that I forgot to share the name I had thought of for the little girl. I thought it was fitting to honor both grandmothers. It would have been better understood in another time and another place, I supposed.

I cradled her as best I could and she snuggled in. I felt a sharp cutting as she bit me. I looked down to see her mouth was full of teeth.

"No! Renesmee!" Edward scolded her. I felt no burning. She wasn't venomous, but her teeth were strong. All eyes were on me in expectation, but I gave them no screaming reply. They figured out I wasn't changing and continued sealing me up.

I asked for an hour with my little girl before Edward was to change me and I was granted my request. I fed her blood from a sturdy metal bottle. I was a little loopy from the pain killers and whatever else Carlisle had given me, so I didn't exactly make it the full hour. It might have only been minutes. Edward was there to take her as my arm failed in fatigue. He looked at me strangely and pulled back the covers.

"She's hemorraging! Someone take the baby. We have to do this, now!" He shouted as I passed out.

I partially came to as I felt a large needle piercing my chest and a slicing at my wrists and ankles. He saw my eyes flutter and moved to kiss me on the cheek. "I'm sorry it had to be like this. I'm sorry about what you're about to go through."

I realized thickly as the fire in my veins started that I needed to fight my desired response to scream. I must reign it in and be in control of my body. I had been strong enough to live without Edward. I was fierce in carrying and birthing Renesmee. I would steal Amzonian strength to keep what I was about to go through to myself. He shouldn't know and neither should my precious baby. I would not stain their memories with weakness.

I went in and out of consciousness keeping a tenuous hold on my priorities. I kept my eyes closed, my eyes shut, and my mouth sealed. It took all I had, but after while my mental capabilities expanded making it paradoxically easier and harder. It was easier because of the ability to focus. It was more difficult because of the power to think on multiple tracts of thought made the pain able to fight for more of my attention. I wouldn't give in to it.

Soon my surroundings were added to what was vying for my thoughts. I chased them rather than the searing pain of the venom. I heard an episode of Supernatural being watched in the living room. I thought that might mean it was Wednesday evening, but I wasn't sure that it wasn't being streamed from an alternate source. Later, I heard a few episodes of Star Trek the Next Generation being binge watched on a computer on another floor.

I heard Edward reading to Renesmee. I wasn't familiar with the passages to know what the book was, but in could tell they were near me as I burned.

Soon I felt the pain leaving my extremities and moving to my heart. Alice and Edward were discussing how my progress was going, but Alice was thinking her replies, so I didn't know more than Edward's side of the conversation. How frustrating!

Then my heart started beating unbelievably fast. I barely heard them all assemble in the room over the sound of its thudding. Then it stopped and only Renesmee, Annie, Leah, and Jacob's hearts could be heard, but they weren't in the room with me. They were on a separate floor.

I opened my eyes and was startled as something touched me. I leapingly flipped over backwards and landed in a protective crouch as I surveyed the room for a threat. I noted Jasper and Emmett were also on alert. I reasoned it must be the appropriate response. As I scanned the room, I didn't see anything out of the ordinary. Then I realized two things. One, I was the cause of their worry and two, the touch I felt was Edward whose skin was now the same temperature as mine. Oops! How embarrassing!

I looked over at him with guilt in my eyes, but he only looked at me in wonder and love. I moved, too quickly, to hug him, whispering, "I love you."

He made a noise of discontent and it came to me. I was stronger than he and I was hurting him. I stepped back, more shame washing over me.

"It's ok, Love. I am so happy you're more sturdy. Now I don't have to be so careful with you, though it would seem you might have to be considerate of me." he chuckled and added. "My only disappointment is that I can't hear you."

I was very pleased with that development and replied, "Well, at least I've kept that. If only I can walk without tripping." How strangely my voice sounded!

The whole room relaxed and laughed with us.

Emmett added, "Don't worry about hurting him, Bella. We can fix what you break." He wagged his eyebrows suggestively. Everyone gave him a "not the time" glare. His only response was "What?"

Alice had dashed out and had now returned with a huge mirror that was bigger than a person her size should be able to carry and let me see myself for the first time. She put her arm around me as we gazed on my newness and we smiled in concert.

"Finally." She sighed. "It's as I saw. You are beautiful."

"She was always beautiful, Alice. She didn't have to become a vampire for looks." Edward went on. "But I am happy that we can be together forever." He looked over at Carlisle meaningfully and said to me, "Let's hunt before the inquisition begins."

I looked down at how I was dressed and found a nice blue dress that wasn't appropriate for hunting. "Can't I have jeans for this? I don't want to ruin this beautiful outfit." Alice glared at me and then was pleased I called her outfit beautiful. Esme left and returned with more suitable hunting attire. Everyone but Edward left me to change.

As I undressed I noted that the scars from my surgery were not there. James's crescent shape bite was overshadowed by a new scar, the one that saved me this time.

I saw Edward look at me with hunger in his eyes and I was filled with the same desire. "Maybe hunting can wait," I stated.

"I'm not comfortable with that. Let's get you fed and then we can fulfill other desires. I can't believe you are even able to think of..."

I covered his mouth with my own. I could think of other things. I was naked and he was not. He needed to be. I put my finger to my lips to show him we needed to be quiet -as if he didn't know.

I led him to the bed I had been lying on. "I have one need that is taking my attention now."

He had to stop denying me what I wanted sooner or later. Better he learned that his vampire wife should get what she wants when she wants. We would both be happier this way.

It was more than our honeymoon attempts as he didn't have to hold back in worry of hurting me -just quietly enough to not let Emmett tease us any more. It was amazing! It was a miracle we were quiet. He later told me that he thought we both might have some special gift of control. I wasn't as assured of that, since I had had the strong need for him, but I guessed that wasn't what he was referring to.

We dressed together and then he led me to jump out the window to hunt.

We were along the trail when I caught the most appealing scent and I knew it was human. I held my breath as we continued on to find a man caught in an old rusty bear trap. I turned to look at Edward whose eyes had turned black. He passed me growling, "Mine!" I had to think fast. I sped to pass him and crouch before the passed out but still alive hiker. Edward was still beyond reason. He leapt for the man and I cut him off. He was fighting hard. Man did it hurt. He detached my arm and I screamed. That brought him back to reason. He reattached my arm and apologised profusely.

"Let's call Carlisle!" I suggested but he only collapsed in a pile of shame. I reached in his pocket and got his phone myself to make the call.

I picked Edward up and carried him about ten minutes away. Then I sat down beside him and caressed him lovingly. He looked up at me to reiterate, "I'm so sorry, Bella." He was still very upset about hurting me.

"Do you remember how when you first asked if you could watch me hunt and I told you I wouldn't want you near once I had given myself over to the hunt?" I nodded. I did remember. "Well, now you understand how it is. And you're a newborn so the instinct and need is even stronger. Or at least it should be." He caressed my face and kissed me gently. "I'm in awe of you. More mature vampires couldn't have kept their senses so easily. You are definitely meant for the vegetarian lifestyle." He kissed me. "So incredible!" He whispered against my skin.

"Well, part of me wanted him, but part of me was thinking that he needed help. That part was stronger, I guess. But I did want him." I tried to get off the pedestal he was placing me on.

"Of course you did. You're a vampire and the man was bleeding. You're not even an hour from 'birth.' I can't believe you were able to try to stop me." He shook his head and closed his eyes in reverence. "Your mind must be so amazing!" How he coveted my thoughts.

"Carlisle has made it to the injured man. He will be able to take care of him. Let's hunt." He said after we had been quiet for a few more minutes. He grinned at me as we stood to run away from the scent of humans.

We found some deer and a mountain lion. He let me have first dibs on the lion, ever the gentleman. After I had had my fill he caught the scent of a second mountain lion. I watched him as he hunted. I noted how he moved. He was so graceful, so swift, so mine. He dropped its corpse and smiled a gleaming grin. He had wet wipes stowed away in his pocket and he wiped his mouth and then he brought one over to wipe mine.

It was very sensual. The way every touch he gave me, even this innocent act, seemed to set me afire with desire. I needed him again. After we buried the last body and the wipes, I pulled him to me. We stood in an embrace. I could stand like this forever and not move except that my body wanted more.

I began to kiss him and he read my message clearly. He laughed,"We have a lot of time to make up, don't we?" I agreed. He listened for any thoughts in the area and let me know that we were definitely alone. With no need to be as quiet as we had been for our brief encounter back at the house, we could really let go and express our emotions to each other.

After about an hour of satiation, we sighed together. We were holding eyes and he knew what I was thinking without hearing it.

"Renesmee?" He asked.

I nodded thinking about the unclear memory I had of her birth. "Yes. Definitely. I need to see that she is more than a dream."

 _ **A/N: So many "new" things for Edward and Bella. I had to have him lose his mind over the profusely bleeding hiker and have her be the savior. One of them had to break. After all, they are vampires. He will castigate himself for centuries for detaching her arm. Be assured of that**_.

 _ **Thank you for your time,**_

 _ **JaelSarjenka**_


	15. Chapter 15 Dumb Wolf Tricks Will Get

Chapter 15 Dumb Wolf Tricks Will Get You Nowhere

Jacob met us a few hundred feet from the house. He made some goofy remarks about me and my new body, especially the blood red eyes. I finally understood the discomfort of being around a stinky wolf and wondered how William and Leah got around it, imprinting magic or not. Wolf stank was nasty!

I mentioned that I was ready to meet Renesmee and Jacob got all weird. We went inside together and he was all nervous as I held her. The others were laid back knowing how I handled myself with the bleeding hiker. I watched him, puzzling over the way he watched us, particularly as he looked at her.

Renesmee had been anxious to meet me, too. She "told" me so by placing thoughts and memories in my mind as she touched my face. How amazing! She was so much like her amazing father. I did see myself in her eyes and Charlie's hair. Her aptitude was all Edward though. She was brilliant and talented -and all of 3 days old.

My intuition didn't take long to tell me Jacob had imprinted on Renesmee. I decided to remain calm about this. I knew from spending all that time with Quil and Claire that he probably wasn't having untoward thoughts about her. Edward would probably have already killed him if he had.

Then my fuzzy human memory was jogged. I remembered how Jake had tortured Edward after realizing he could read minds and made a dream out to be reality.

"Jake," I masked my ire as I started the interrogation. "So, I heard you knew Edward had been to town looking for me."

He was starting to look uncomfortable.

"Yeah, I was giving him updates as to how well you were doing while he was away, " he said softly, worry in his eyes.

Leah was watching. "He knew?" Then to him,"You knew?"

He nodded in assent.

"How could you keep that from the pack?" She wondered, as did I.

"Umm... It turns out you can contol thoughts that the others can hear..." He looked a little bashful, "Sam and Seth knew he had passed through the territory around Bella's nineteenth birthday. I didn't tell Sam that I talked to him, though. I blocked it from my mind. I figured how to do that early on. Actually, we all had to reign in our thoughts after Leah joined us. She didn't make it easy for anyonewho caught a glimpse of her phasing back as a naked human and thought about it later. Also, Sam thought it best if everyone didn't know that Edward was nearby since Seth had been tempted to rip him to shreds on Bella's behalf. I figured my deal with him would not go over well with anyone or someone might tell her about it." Jake was trying hard to do some damage control.

Leah looked at the anger emanating from me and the humor in Edward's eyes.

"I think you might ought to run, Jake." William advised. He had seen the lie.

Jasper encouraged Rosalie to take Renesmee to another room to have her bottle. He sensed the emotions rising in the room.

"So what about the lie, Jake?" I asked pointedly.

"Run!" William said in a singsong, "while you can."

Jake smirked, "I was just protecting you."

"With what some sick fantasy dream?" I crouched.

Jake was unconcerned and he blushed as he said, "It wasn't exactly a dream!"

I was at a loss to know what in the world he meant by that. Then Edward, was livid as he recounted Jake's memory, "He was seeing a girl in Seattle. Some nights he dressed her like you. She was blonde, but her skin tone was like yours. He had her wear a wig."

I was disgusted. The others' faces mirrored the same.

Leah screamed, "That's why you made the rest of us endure your sick fantasies? To practice fooling Edward?" Seth, hearing this joined us in our slow progression toward Jake. I vaguely remembered our conversation about Jake's girlfriend. Jake backed out of the door and down the steps away from the house, closer to the river path.

"Please, forgive me Bells, I was just trying to save you." He begged.

"Umm, I'm not sure that's what that was," I was so close to snapping.

"It doesn't matter anyway cause you're with him now and I've got someone to love, too." Was that supposed to make it better?

"You think that my daughter is going to be fine with what you did? You think magic's gonna cover your sick obsession with me?" I argued.

"It was her. It was always her." He tried to come up with some pathetic excuse to cover his rear.

"What?" I was seeing red.

"Half of her was always with you. " He was grasping with words instead of making his get away as he should have.

"So, why didn't you fantasize about Edward's half?" I asked and Edward cringed.

"Who said he didn't?" Leah humorlessly chimed in.

"I don't swing like that." Jake replied firmly. "Besides, Nessie likes me, too!"

I was past calming as I went after him. "You're nick naming my baby after a lake monster?"

I was getting closer to him, but he didn't seem afraid enough to me. Leah stayed by my side. "You think you might want to rethink that after your story sent her father into the ocean?"

Esme joined us at that information. She hadn't known what exactly had driven Edward to spend a year in the water. Jake was starting to look appropriately frightened after seeing the calm maternal one was ready to squish him. He was being followed by vampires and wolves. His life could end very shortly.

We had pursued him to the river when Carlisle, William, and Edward had come between the stupid wolf and the rest of us to protect the idiot.

"I can't stay away from her." He pleaded with me.

"Try." I used my most menacing voice.

"You know it's impossible." He argued.

I had spent time with Quil. They were apart weeks at a time when Claire was away. It was hard on him, but they both survived. Jake and Renesmee would too.

"Jake, stay away for a while. If I understand imprinting correctly, it will hurt her if we kill you. Just let us all calm down." Edward was trying to kindly diffuse the situation. I was certain it was the hurting Renesmee part that helped him keep his level head. It was all that was keeping me from breaking his stupid face. The friendly memories I had of Jake, watching movies and sharing pizza, were disentegrating in my fury.

Jake didn't look like he would relent. He was stubborn and dumb to boot. Did he realize that my old memories were fragile and these would override them?

Edward smiled a little vindictively as he said, "We will let you know her progress, we can even send you pictures. We will let you know she is happy and safe with us."

Jasper had joined us, "You know it's what you deserve, Jake. Maybe better than what you deserve."

Jake finally hung his head in shame. He did know that. But it wasn't enough for me. I couldn't help myself any longer knowing he was getting a better promise than Edward had gotten from him. I ran at him and threw him across the river. He bounced a little on the moss covered boulders and cracked a young spruce tree, but he was fine. I was relieved and bummed at the same time. I glowered at him until he ran out of sight, all the same.

We only banned him for a week out of principle. It also kept me from killing him. He stayed completely away for one day, going home to talk to his dad. Then he came back. He sat as a wolf on the other side of the river watching us throughout the rest of his exile. Emmett felt sorry for him and took him some food.

The rest of the family had built a fairy tale inspired stone cottage out on the back fourty of the property for Edward and me. We were too disgustingly in love, so they told us to be lovey dovey over there away from them. It was trying for Jasper as he had to feel our lust, which he said was worse than Emmett's and Rose's. Edward was a bit smug about that. Maybe I was, too.

They had started building it secretly (from me - no secrets could be kept from Edward) before the wedding. I was very pleased with it. I already felt like a peasant whisked away by a prince. Why not have a home that looked as if were the backdrop of such a story? Maybe it was cliche. I really didn't care about that. It felt right to me.

At sunset, Alice and Esme presented us with a key for it. Esme took Renesmee from my arms and promised to watch her for the night so we could spend the first night alone in our little place of solitude. It was situated far enough away from the rest of the family that Edward didn't have to work so hard to push down their thoughts and Jasper wouldn't be overwhelmed by our emotions.

Our first night together was blissful. We had already sated the primal edge of our desires and could simply express our love for each other. There was need but it was fueled by the want of intimacy not just the physical urge to mate or mark each other as our own. It was poetry spelled out in each caress and sigh -true love making.

I never wanted our sensual communications to end and I sensed the same from him, but as the muted light of a cloudy day crept through our windows we knew we were responsible for a little life. I had already missed crucial bonding time with her while I was transformed. So we untangled ourselves and promised each other that the night would come swiftly and we would return to our little dove cote.

Our closets were ridiculously stocked by Alice, but Edward led me to a small dresser where Esme, bless her, had thought to put simple jeans and t-shirts like I normally wear. They might have been of a higher quality than my old ones were, but most of my old clothes had been stretched terribly by my daily growth while carrying Renesmee. I insisted on wearing my own clothes for the first week. I think Alice only allowed this as she foresaw with logic (she couldn't "see"my future with her gift) the destruction of my wardrobe and an opportunity to shop for me.

Renesmee was unhappy about missing Jacob. As he had said, she liked him too. Rose took her outside for hours at a time so they could watch each other across the river. Renesmee would wave and clap. Jake would frolic, leap, and tumble. Soon the week was over and he came across the river straight to her. Rose was holding her and Renesmee very nearly leapt from her arms into his.

Jake was watching how sad I had been about missing Charlie. Time may be different for older vampiress, but I was still young and impatient. I wanted to have my eyes change enough to see him and give him a good farewell. I guess my anxiety was getting the best of Jake, because one morning he made a last minute choice to go tell Charlie I was in town. I was supposed to be in a spa in Geneva. He wasn't even worried about me, but now he was kind of suspicious that we were lying to him and hurt that we didn't want to be around him.

Jake didn't prepare Charlie for my changes or for meeting Renesmee. Jake only told him to come over at 6 in the evening after work. Alice had no foresight because of the wolf vision blocking phenomenon. Jake had concealed his thoughts from Edward by thinking of other things.

At 5:45 we heard the tires on the pavement. We all looked to Edward.

"It's Charlie. It seems Jacob has invited him for dinner." He growled the last part with worry in his heart for me, he knew that I would suffer from the desire for my father's blood. He knew that if I could keep from killing him, it would be by denying myself soothing from the intense burn.

I looked at Jacob and asked him in a cold voice, "Do you hate Charlie so much that you've brought him here to die?"

"Pfftt." He scoffed. "You're not gonna kill him. You didn't kill me when you were angry and you didn't kill the man with freaking blood all over him. This is your dad. You've got this. I have faith in you. You've been missing him. He's been missing you. Why shouldn't I alleviate this for you?" His ego was huge today, bigger than usual. It worried me. Then he added, "And I guess I feel like I need to make up to you after I was such a huge jerk. I was a bit selfish. I wanted you to myself. You have to know I had to take the chance to keep you human and mine."

I shoved that to the side of my thoughts as Charlie's steps were bringing him closer to me. I steeled myself. I took a huge breath as I pondered how to act like a human. Edward told me to go to Alice's room quickly as she had something for me. I flitted up the stairs at an inhuman pace but listened to what was happening as I reached Alice's door.

Carlisle opened the door before Charlie knocked. He greeted him, "Hi Charlie,"

"Hey Carlisle. I heard the kids are in from Sweden, or Switzerland -I get those two mixed up. I'm sure after they show me pictures I'll be straightened out." His unhappiness was evident in the tone he used.

"Sure. I'm not sure they've unpacked their camera yet, but I bet they'll be happy to do so." Carlisle fibbed happily.

Alice had drug me to a bathroom stocked with muli-colored contacts - a little something for everybody. They've kept them on hand for when red-eyed vampires visit and now for me until my red eyes turn golden. I hadn't worn them yet. As she helped me poke myself in the eye with them, I found them annoying, my perfect sight was marred by the spots and imperfections in the little round lenses.

I walked into the living room where Jake and Carlisle we chatting with Charlie. He gasped on seeing me walk gracefully in my new body.

"Holy crow?" He whispered. He glowered at Carlisle, "What have you done to my baby?"

Carlisle opened his mouth to speak when Jake interrupted."Hey, did you know Bella almost died a week or so ago?"

Charlie's glare whipped from Carlisle to Jake and back.

Carlisle put his hand on his forehead and groaned, "Jake, this is dangerous territory you're taking us on."

Jake snickered,"Dangerous ground, huh?" He started kicking off his shoes as his verbal diarrhea began in earnest."It's true. She nearly died last week. The doc here and Edward saved her. Serious, Charlie. This is something I would never lie about." He continued to disrobe. "You see how she has changed. It's not natural and it's not safe for you to question." He was naked in the living room. "The world you live in is bigger than what you think. No, the world you live in is way cooler than you know."

As he finished the last word he phased. We were all frozen, uncertain of what to do. We were all unable to take our eyes from the train wreck as it was happening. Charlie, absolutely incredulous through the whole thing, was hyperventalating now. Alice brought a bag from the kitchen for him to breathe in as Jake again returned human-ish.

Charlie looked at me and asked pointedly. "Do you become an animal now too?"

I closed my eyes and sighed, "No, Dad. I do not."

"Then what? No. Wait, maybe I don't want know." He put his hands on his head and stared down at the floor, probably looking for a sane world. He didn't know whether to be relieved or have further concerns.

"Charlie, she can't tell you and neither can these good people. It's for their safety. All of them. Bella included. Our world is secret to protect ourselves and people like you, Charlie. People who would rather keep the supernatural over there." Jake pointed to some books on a shelf."Also, it's to protect precious, special people." He went around to the kitchen and pulled Renesmee from Rose who had been keeping her quiet there."Like this most wonderful little girl."

Edward came behind me and wrapped me in his arms. Jake carried Renesemee to me to hold. I took her and prepared myself to present her to her grandfather.

Charlie looked at her and she smiled up at him. He made a sharp intake of breath, "She has your eyes, my hair." I could see his mind reeling. "She's so much like you, Edward. How is this possible?" He knew there wasn't nearly enough time. He sent me off with Edward for our honeymoon about two months ago. I was certainly not pregnant then.

I said softly, "She's a miracle." I smiled as I felt the truth of that statement calm me from this nerve racking situation. Edward was still holding me. I was glad, because it was getting harder. I could see the blood moving beneath his skin and he smelled quite delicious. I remembered the hiker's blood flowing.

I was interupted in my thoughts by a new thought from outside my mind. Renesmee was showing me a picture of Charlie holding her. I looked at Edward. He was unsure but he nodded after a second.

"Would you like to hold her? This is Renesmee Carlie, our daughter." I offered with trepidation.

I passed her to him and he looked down at her with a captivated smile, "She is special, isn't she?" And then before we could think to keep her from it, she touched his cheek. He jumped.

"What?" He began and then he decided not to ask. Instead he talked to her, "That's your momma huh? Do you love your momma?"

I guessed she was showing him pictures of me. I'd ask Edward later. Knowing about Edward's gift might push him over the edge. They kept talking for a few minutes like that.

Renesmee hugged her grandfather and then he handed her to Jake saying, "I think she wants you."

Jake took her back to the kitchen smiling like the cat who caught the canary.

Charlie exhaled and turned to me, "She showed me how you had her and then were hemorraging." Then he looked at Edward. "I heard the fear in your voice." He stepped toward Edward and hugged him. "Thank you. I don't know what you did, but I know you love my girl. I think you can understand how I feel about her." He meaningfully looked in the direction Jake had taken Renesmee. "I believe you will take care of them both. How long do I have with them. I'm guessing you'll have to move before long." He put that all together quickly.

I answered, "We're not sure. We have to keep our secret, but as long as you can be calm about this, we will stay for a while."

He nodded. "I don't know what saving you entailed. I think she refrained from showing that or maybe she didn't see. I don't need to know. I'm curious as the day is long, but I think I can be happier with you nearby than knowing and losing you." Then he added "Or whatever would have to happen." He shuddered. He seemed to be keeping his mind from probing too much into this new reality.

Jake came to bring him to the dining table where Esme had prepared a nice fried chicken dinner for them and Renesmee. When he looked at the empty chairs, Jake told him that we had already eaten and that he hadn't exactly given us notice that he had passed an invitation to dinner. Charlie frowned at that.

Jake had convinced Renesemee to eat some of the chicken and mashed potatoes. I was impressed. She didn't exactly like human food, though her system could definitely take it. She'd do anything to please her Jacob, I guessed.

Charlie moved to the living room discussing sports with Emmett. As he tired he sighed heavily and told us he would be leaving. He kept looking around, perhaps trying to decide if it was a dream or not.

I walked with him outside, "Thanks Dad. Love you." I hugged him. He made me smile as he said, "I love you too, Bells" and got in his cruiser to leave. Before he left he said, "Bells, can we keep this from Renee? I don't think she could handle it." I agreed with him.

He put the key I'm the ignition but didn't turn it, "Sue knows already, doesn't she?" He asked intuitively.

I nodded. He started the car and left, rolling up his window.

I turned to the house walked in, saw that Esme was now holding Renesmee and so I decided to walk over and punch Jacob in the mouth, breaking his jaw with a rather satisfying crunch.

Carlisle had him fixed up in less than an hour. He didn't even wire his mouth shut.

A/N: _**Sorry that it has taken me so long to update. Between internet issues and being sick, I was forced to take a break from editing. T'is the season for colds and such. I hope the editing on this isn't very bad. I'm still fighting the "ick." Hopefully, it won't take me as long to update next time. I pretty much have the rest of it done, along with a companion piece from a surprise perspective that I will post separately. I just have to tweak it all a bit for it to all be ready.**_

 _ **I hope you are still enjoying it...**_

 _ **JaelSarjenka**_


	16. Chapter 16 Weight of Truth

Chapter 16 The weight of truth

It seemed that things were going well all around me. I had so many pleasant surprises since I awoke to my new life. It appeared immortality was what I had been meant for. I had spent so much time feeling out of place as a human, but all that had changed. It may just be that my niche is with Edward and his family.

When I was trying to do so much philanthropic work to fill the huge whole in my heart and keep me going for Charlie -and myself, I still wasn't whole. I think all those things did prepare me. Perhaps the maturity that I gained in that time of separation helped me to have a smoo ther transition than normal vampires had. Maybe that's all anyone needed to make the move from mortal to immortal. I grasped the idea of the gift that time had been more firmly. Hindsight was clearest, indeed.

I had to believe that Edward was not upset at how things turned out, even with our daughter being fated to be joined with a wolf. He was so happy. We were utterly content together. Our deep joy spread to the rest of the family. Jasper seemed to be the most relaxed that he had ever been since positivity emanated from each of us.

I was pleased to be able to have just a tad bit more contact with Charlie. I know we wasted a lot of time when I was human. I guess I truly regret how I treated him as a misguided teen demanding to have him meet me in California and all. I love my mother, but her attitude toward the weather in Forks affected how I saw my father. It was as if he was just a sperm donor I had to make contact with once a year. I was so absorbed with myself and caring for my mother that I failed to see how much I was hurting him. I was glad that I spent more quality time with him when I came in to visit while I was at the university.

It took becoming a mother myself to understand it all better. I didn't want to squander what time I had now with him. It won't be long. I won't endanger him purposefully. I was glad I had matured to that extent. No matter how mature my mother thought I was, I still had growing up to do.

I had been able to renew my friendship with my wolf friends. They all were surprised that I was rather myself -well, other than the scary scarlet eyes. They were impressed with my ability to remain calm and not eat people. They were seeing vampires more humanely. Of course William had broken the ice in the first place. It seemed that seeing how controlled I have been since the beginning of my change has made even more of them revise their thoughts on monsters. Many of them came to hang out with us. The treaty line was nearly non-existent. We were still polite enough not to push it and wander onto the reservation, though. No one wanted to push the balance we had achieved.

We were not so blissed out with all these good things that we weren't concerned about Annie and Renesmee. There were many things that caused concerns for both families. Their rate of growth was disquieting on its own. Would their lives be shortened as a result?

They were both brilliant, as well. They were both talking early. Annie, of course, leading as she was a couple of months older. They could both already read. What Renesmee didn't learn from us, she learned from her Annie. They begged to visit each other quite often. How could we not allow them their sweet friendship? As if either set of parents could deny their girls anything, especially since they were both rather unique beings. It seemed appropriate that we should allow them each other's company.

Sue and Charlie were frequent visitors of the mystical pair. They marveled at the two girls, though Sue knew more of their origins. Charlie had no sense of unease that he showed around us or them. We hadn't completely revealed what we were to him. We wanted to avoid that. I figured Sue would protect him from the depths of her knowledge.

One morning, Sue had come without Charlie. We were all playing dress-up in Rosalie's room with the girls. Rose and Alice were with us laughing at the girls' merriment and taking pictures. Leah and William had gone for a short walk. Alice's face went blank and Edward stared through her as he shared her vision. They were paler than pale could ever be as it ended and their eyes locked.

Edward decided before sharing the information with the rest of us, "I'll call Carlisle. Sue, would you mind to keep the girls' company. We will share with you later. Bella darling, call Leah, William, and Jake to come back as soon as possible. This is not good news."

Once we were assembled Alice and Edward stood in front of us in the living room. They were both uneasy about the intelligence her foresight had given them. Alice shifted her weight and began. "I saw Irina go to the Volturi to lodge a formal complaint against the wolves for killing Laurent and against Edward for telling the secret to a human without changing her. She also told them about Leah, William, and Annie. They are coming for them and Bella. She obviously doesn't know about Bella being changed nor about Renesmee."

Edward added, "They're all coming, even the wives."

"The wives never leave Volterra," Jasper whispered incredulously.

Silence filled the room as everyone felt the weight of what was happening. After a few minutes, Alice had another vision that narrowed down the timing. She believed it would take them three months to arrange the trip. They were calling in the best guards from around the world.

"Is there any response we can have to derail this from happening?" Esme asked in a serious hushed tone.

"The decisions have already been made." Alice was certain of that. "The vision was very clear. No uncertainty clouded my sight at all. It was as if they had already been considering our coven a threat."

Rosalie interjected disbelieving, "They see us, the pacifists, as a threat?"

Jasper fielded this one, "We are a very gifted coven that they don't understand. Plus, they think we are aberrations for rejecting the idea of drinking human blood. "

"I am no longer human. We can refute that part." I thought I should point that out.

"As soon as Aro touches one of us, he will know that Charlie knows something. He may not know specifics but they have killed humans for less knowledge. They will still see us at odds with the law." Rosalie said unhappily. She had grown to enjoy his and Sue's company. Then she added somberly, "They will know about Renesmee also and may see her as a problem as well."

"What can we do?" I wondered.

Carlisle looked at me sadly. "We must think carefully what we should do. In the meantime, I will call Eleazer for any advice he may give considering what he must have learned as part of the Volturi guard."

We all sat still for some time. Carlisle finally excused himself to call Eleazar and we all went different directions to think. Jacob climbed the stairs to find Renesmee and share with Sue. Leah and William followed after to see Annie. Edward and I went out to sit on the porch giving Jake a few minutes before our new parent minds took over in panic mode. We just sat and held each other.

Alice and Jasper asked to go to our cottage to be away from the interference that wolves and our half- children caused. She needed to see better. We hoped she could give us a better time line. When they returned she had thought it would be about spring break. I should have been able to predict that by precedence.

The Denali's were coming to aid in our planning. They were appalled that Irina had gone this route in her vengeance. How sorrow drives a creature! They had vowed to stand with us to dissuade their minds or fight for our rights.

Who knew how chatty vampires could be? A great number had started showing up on the lawn, brought by whispers that something was going down. It was surprising enough that many came from our continent, but when they started coming from all over the world, we were overwhelmed. It appeared that many were opposed to the Volturi's mode of operation and would like to see them turn or burn.

In the meantime, Eleazar started to train the gifted of us to better use our gifts. The time he spent with me was in trying to get me to extend my shield to others. He had others use their gifts on each other to see if I could be spurred by compassion to help them. It worked well.

We were not overly surprised to find that Annie's gift was growing. Eleazar and Carlisle were discussing how it had become more similar to William's gift. Where he could see kept secrets, she could cause you to spill your guts. If she set her sights on you, there was no holding off, unless you were unaffected by such things. I wasn't affected by her talent. However, she did make Emmett own up that he had been hiding the cookies after Annie and Renesmee had been over-eating. He was only trying to protect them from dooming themselves to belly-aches.

Emmett started to call her "Veritaserum," which was shortened to "Verity." She quite liked that as she had already been reading Harry Potter. She might look like a 4 year-old, but her mind was much more advanced. It was the same with Renesmee. They were a pair of brilliant children.

About a week before we expected the Volturi would come, a group from South America arrived. They travelled together as one coven but were actually two. There were three who were like sisters who were never far apart from each other. One, Zafrina, could make you see what she wanted you to see. Renesmee and Annie had a great time with her. They thought she was better than the nature shows they watched on TV.

The other two that were with the women were a most unique pair. They were an aunt and a nephew. Nahuel's mother was human when he was conceived. His father did not so much care about her and so she died in birth. Unlike Annie and Renesmee, Nahuel was venomous. He bit his aunt, Huilen, as she had tried to care for him as she had promised his mother, Pire, that she would.

Their arrival made us feel better about the girls' future. He had many half-sisters as his father was quite the Don Juan. Or incubus. Take your pick. He informed us that they stopped aging near ten years of age -give or take. He informed us that he was 150 years of age.

After the South Americans came, a strange pair which seemed to be the original Romanian Draculas had come. The Volturi had over thrown them a long time ago. They hoped they would see the deaths of the trio which had brought them so low. They reveled in the sight of the number assembled and were drop-jawed at the gifts many of us had. They were certain of victory.

The packs also had grown. Of course there would be with the number of man eating vampires around. I pointed out to Sam one day that it was not the vegetarian Cullens that caused him to phase the first time. It was the presence of James' coven In the area. They were a true threat. The Cullens had been in Forks for about two years before he changed. This revelation improved his mindset with the vegetarians. Both packs were leary about so many red eyes, but many of those vampires were seeing the benefits of being more compassionate and humane. It seemed a different kind of revolution was happening. The idea that they did have a choice in their behavior was becoming obvious to many of them.

We made sure Charlie stayed clear of the great house, but we brought the girls to see him and Sue as often as we could. The Sunday afternoon before it was all to go down we visited him. We had been lightly warning Charlie about the situation since the vision came to Alice and we reiterated it to some extent before we were all setting up to leave. Of course, Sue knew pretty much everything.

Charlie had asked if everything would be ok when little Annie decided her momma should tell him the truth. Leah had opened her mouth to give him some reassurances when the little prudent one put her hands on her hips and fixed her eyes on Leah. Leah spewed forth every last detail, no reserves.

Charlie looked like he would collapse. The bad vampires were coming for his grandbabies. There was nothing he could do. Sue had known, but bound by tribal secrecy had kept it all locked inside. They both cried together helplessly knowing the truth of the coming slaughter.

I was overcome with the reality that Charlie knew. There was no more guessing. No more "need to know" situation. Our little Veritaserum had decided he needed to know.


	17. Chapter 17 Judgement Day Pt 1

Chapter 17 Judgement Day, Part 1

We had gathered the day before we expected the Volturi to come out in the clearing where we first saw James' coven during the infamous baseball game. This is where our fight for our lives would happen. I felt woefully unprepared and inexperienced, no matter how good of training I had been through over the past three months. Alice couldn't see the outcome of the fight due to the presence of so many wolves, while Sue's tea leaves only told her that a significant change was coming for all involved.

It wasn't strange that the week that would have been spring break had I still been pursuing further education brought snow. It snowed in spring often. It was intermittent but it was sticking and causing drifts.

One of our visitors, Benjamin, could affect the elements. After staring into the forest, he moved boulders in patterns and covered them with snow like snow forts. I couldn't figure how that would be helpful, but perhaps he was just trying to do something.

The wolves had built a fire for the Renesmee and Annie. We had set up a tent for them to sleep in. They would keep warm inside wrapped in blankets. Their body temperatures ran higher than human body temperatures, also, like the wolves' did. If the girls had been more fragile I would have thought Benjamin could have caused a summer day. I'm not sure that he had tested his abilities that far since Alice had seen a blizzard coming soon.

A couple of new young wolves were assigned to stay with the elderly council members, the imprints, Sue, and Charlie. They were all at Sam and Emily's the last I heard. A couple wolves stayed in wolf form to communicate with them. The others were in human form and they traded stories with the older vampires.

As the girls slept, Edward and I sat watching the fire intertwined as did William and Leah. My mind was leaping between tracks of troubled thoughts. Too many "what ifs" assailed me. I felt a calming wave and without turning my head to look at him I said, "Thank Jasper. I'm glad you're here on our side."

We had a short strategy meeting with Jasper making suggestions of how to best use our gifts and who to target. I was tasked with protecting as many as I could with my shield from the mental talent barrage that would come, particularly regarding a pair of twins named Alec and Jane. Zafrina and Benjamin would stay near me to protect me and to be protected should my shield weaken from fatigue. Jasper was going to carefully sway their feelings as Edward would direct considering conscious thought and decisions being made in real time. Jasper had to take care in focusing his efforts. He didn't need to make our side more relaxed about not attacking ourselves. Chelsea's loyalty binding talent would likely skew how they would respond to their feelings, anyway. There was much conjecture but no final decision of what to do about Chelsea. With her there , the entire field of alliances could change.

Morning came and with first light Alice said, "They're nearly here." We all looked in the direction she did. The wolves had moved into the forest surrounding the clearing. When the Volturi guard advanced toward us in formation, the wolves stepped into view. The cloaked figures stopped at the sight of the giant wolves. The realization that extinction of the wolves was such a great possibility sharpened my focus and my desire to fight for them as well as my family.

There was a group of vampires following behind them that Edward described as the Volturi's witnesses. They were already whipped into a frenzy and the sight of our numbers with the wolves antagonized them further. They bared their teeth at us and crouched ready to spring into action. Edward explained that Chelsea was binding their loyalty to Aro.

Aro was a strange looking vampire with dark hair, onion paper looking skin and dull, though red, eyes. He was the first to speak, "We are here to confront these wolves who are assembled here, a vampire named William, his strange halfling offspring, and a human named Bella. There have been charges made by one vampire, Irina, who claims the wolves killed her mate, and William protected a wolf from her, that he and that wolf were about to have a child at that time, and that they were accompanied by a human named Bella who had been meant to be Edward Cullen's mate."

Carlisle stepped forward to speak, "Bella is now a newborn. She and Edward have been reunited. The wolves that killed Irina 's mate, Laurent, did so protecting her. It is their duty to protect helpless humans. There has been a miraculous combining of vampire and wolf. She is a brilliant little girl who is growing in mind and body." He said this all in one breath, very quickly. It was obvious he feared being ignored.

The Volturi witnesses were watching with calmer interest. I smiled at Jasper. I was sure everyone felt his calming waves as did I.

Irina had stepped forward through this interchange and was horrified to see her sisters standing behind Leah. She was obviously regretting her decision now that she realized that they meant to side with the Cullens.

Aro looked through our ranks, "I see two small girls. Who is the second one?"

Carlisle answered, "The second is Bella and Edward's daughter, Renesmee."

Caius, with white blonde hair, cut him off before he could say more, "We must kill them both. We have no way of knowing what danger they pose to us."

Nahuel stepped forward, "There is no danger from them to you. I too am half human, half vampire. I am about 150 years old. I can live as a human or as a vampire, depending on how I choose." Caius glared at him as he interupted his call for "justice."

Aro was excited to learn more of his story and was trying to decide who he wanted to talk to first. He decided to ask permission to see the girls first. Renesmee touched his face and he allowed her with a light laugh. "You want to know what my intentions are?" Everyone heard this and her responding "Yes."

Then Annie smiled at him as he opened his mouth to lie, but all he could say was, "I desire power more than anything. At some point I may have to kill my brothers. I have already killed my sister Didyme to keep Marcus by my side and I will stop at nothing to protect my rule. I will have those who have talents today join my ranks while we purge away the rest -even among those I gathered as witnesses. Chelsea will see to it that they are bound to me or she too will die." Caius face was furious as Aro began to speak. That Aro had said that Chelsea bound the vampires to him had not gone unnoticed to most of those assembled. Those affected by said power, didn't appear to care.

I stretched my shield around those on our side as best I could as I saw one I thought that might be Jane start to smile at me. I had been warned what she could do. I didn't want to see it for myself. When nothing happened to any of us, she turned her strange glare at Irina and she fell on her face screaming and writhing in agony. Marcus, who had stepped away from Aro in shock of his confession, told her quietly to stop. She obeyed after turning up her power briefly. Irina slowly collected herself from the ground after Jane turned away from her. I suppose I could have stopped that, but part of me felt it was justified. I was ashamed of that.

We moved away from Aro as he contemplated what to do. Those he gathered shifted their weight trying to figure out what they would do once the fight began. It was obvious that the Volturi was up against a force they had not yet seen. Would it behoove them to join them or should they stand up for themselves since those without talents were meant to die today? In an instant they stood straight and marched behind us. We weren't sure if they were joining us or surrounding us, but there was fear in the brothers' eyes.

Benjamin made a decision we couldn't foresee. He opened the ground beneath Chelsea and then closed it up as she fell into the hot core. I wasn't sure if he caused the lava that burned her underneath or not. Her piercing scream field the area and was cut off. He did this so those previously aligned with the Volturi could make their own decision regarding what side to take. Edward explained later that their passivity after Aro's confession drove him to come up with the quick plan.

There was a collective gasp around the the other side of the clearing as her power evaporated. One among us had fought in many wars during his existence and was given to making battle speeches. His name was Garrett. He and Kate had a little thing forming between them. He looked at the Volturi guard and said,"Your volition is returned to you. What will you do now that you've heard the truth?"

Many things all happened at once. First was movement of vampires defecting from the Volturi side to ours. Then, behind one of the snow forts Benjamin had made, appeared the two young, but still huge, wolves charged with protecting the council. Charlie was on one of their backs. In his hands were flare guns which he aimed at Caius and Aro who were at the moment in a glaring contest between each other. I didn't see if his aim caught them, because two huge guys from the guard moved lighting fast to grab Annie, Renesmee, and me and carried us off away from our family. I did notice a group of three vampires from the witnesses following quickly and stealthily behind us. I later learned that these two huge vampires that had kidnapped us were Felix and Demetri. They also missed the outcome of Charlie's daring move as they carried us away.

I was torn in my terror. Should my anxiety focus on Charlie or Renesmee and Annie? As a vampire I had the capacity to fixate my fear on the both of them as well as the rest of my friends and family on the battlefield far behind us.

 _ **a/n: I'm breaking this one up, but I will post second part soon.**_

 _ **Anyone care to guess who the three following might be?**_

 _ **Happy Reading!**_

 _ **JaelSarjenka**_


	18. Chapter 18 judgement day pt 2

Judgement day continued

It was starting to snow harder as we moved up into the mountains in silence. How were we to be found if the snow covered our tracks and scent? I kept getting glimpses of the trio trailing us, but Demetri and Felix either didn't notice them or were expecting them to follow. They didn't acknowledge their presence one way or another.

They took us up into a large cave and threw us into the back. I checked the girls for injuries quickly and then returned to a protective crouch in front of them. I knew I couldn't fight them alone, but I wasn't going down without a fight.

Demetri and Felix stood together staring intensely at us. They both had pale olive skin, black hair, and scarlet eyes that were darkening as they watched me prepare to defend the girls from them. There was dark humor in their eyes that repulsed me. I wasn't sure what they were planning to do. Was this Caius' plan or their own? I struggled with the idea of asking. Villains on TV often were talkative and would monologue until the heroes arrived. I didn't think these guys were so affable. The each began menacingly rubbing their hands together in anticipation. They weren't so different than the maniacal bad guys from TV. They just didn't have the courtesy to explain their motives. I supposed that was usually the downfall of those tyrants. Their loquacious speeches were what kept them from their intended actions. The heroes always arrived while they were still going on. These two remained still.

The other three that had been quietly following us from the clearing entered the cave holding hands. One was a female with dark brown hair. The other two were both males, one shorter with dark curly hair than ther other wi th blonde wavy hair. The taller one seemed surprised when I locked eyes with him as if I weren't supposed to be seeing him.

It seemed Felix and Demetri didn't know they were there. They let go of their hands and quickly positioned themselves in different places around the cave. This the two Volturi guards noticed. They saw the three vampires and laughed. They thought their size would be on their side. They didn't realize what we were all about to learn about these three.

One, Bree, the girl, was a tracker. As a human girl on the street, she could find what she needed, help from people, food, or money. She stayed out of prostitution that way, she told me later.

Another was a wavy blonde headed vampire named Fred. He was a different kind gifted mental shield. He is why they were undetected by everyone, but me. He could cloak himself and others with his power by making one think he and whoever he was helping were invisible, but they had to be touching him. He could also repel other vampires by making them think they were sick at their stomachs, which wouldn't bother me.

Finally, the one to win this fight was the curly dark haired Diego. He was not only probably the only vampire immune to fire, but he could literally become fire. As Demetri grabbed him to decapitate the smaller vampire, they were both engulfed in flames. When Demetri was ashes, Diego still stood looking menacingly at Felix who had grabbed Bree and was starting to grope her inappropriately in front of the two men to anger them as he was using her as a "vampire" (instead of human) shield.

Fred yelled at Diego, "Move to point B!" as he turned toward Felix. Felix started to heave as he let go of Bree, she ran to the side as Diego rushed at Felix aflame in his anger at what was just done to his mate. Felix was in ashes a few seconds later.

They looked at us and asked us if we were ok. I was fine, but concerned about what the girls had just faced. The girls both said they were fine. They wanted to get back to Jacob, Edward, Leah, and William, as did I, to see if they were safe. I looked at my rescuers to see if they thought it would be safe. We were all unsure, but we didn't know if we would be needed either. I thought about using my cell, but I didn't want to distract anyone at an important moment. We decided to go carefully back down the mountain to see if we could be of help. We would hold hands so we would all be cloaked by Fred. Certainly Fred and Diego could help them if anything was still happening. Their gifts were superb. Bree and I would protect the girls.

-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2

When we got to the field, there were a few piles of ashes. It looked like it was all on the Volturi side. Once their will had been returned, most of the guard defected.

Charlie's aim had been true. Caius' fear of humans knowing the secret of our existence was founded. They could fight back, given the right tools And circumstances. Aro and Caius had been sufficiently distracted by the situation so they didn't notice what was happening until their very flamable bodies were so engulfed in fire that they couldn't even swear by any name in heaven or otherwise. A simple flare gun wielded by a human had taken them out.

Jane and Alec had started to fight for their side, but Zafrina blinded them and they couldn't concentrate to use their gifts of total pain stimulation or sensory deprivation. Then Paul, Jared, Seth, and Sam were able to rip them apart easily while the Romanians set them afire.

Marcus was the last brother standing. He explained he had no desire to rule. He had very little to live for, actually. He made one last decree as a vampire ruler and that was to help each other keep the secret. If someone's being dumb or crazy, either get them help or destroy them. He asked Carlisle if he could stay for a while and rest from all that had transpired. He was pleased to be free. Aro had him enslaved so long he needed to sort out what he was needing to do on his own.

That was really the only Volturi loyalists that were left after Chelsea's power was ended. There was a sense of loss and guilt among the former guard. The overbearing feeling of having been usedpervaded their beings. Jasper sent more calming waves, but knew they had to feel their emotions. They had to deal with it. I hoped they had good coping mechanisms. I thought about how we might have need to set up a sort of crisis counseling center for these vampires. Jasper could only do so much.

Even Renata had stepped away from Aro as he had made his confession, so she had been saved from his flames. She was considering Fred's wavy blonde hair for some time as we all stood together realizing it was over. I was wondering if there was going to be some sort of love connection between those two.

Bree explained to us later that Victoria had created the three of them with some twenty or so others. They were supposed to be her army to fight me. I thought that was rather crazy seeing as how I was human at the time, but that was Victoria, insane to the very last. Some of them had started after me a few months after the wolves had ended Victoria, though they didn't know what had happened to her. They just wanted to fulfill their purpose. The wolves had gotten to them and that is why they were growing that Christmas before I went to Florida, vampires in the forests. I was right to not ask questions. I would have become paranoid quickly.

Diego and Bree had realized they had been duped when they accidentally didn't make it back home before sunrise one day. Victoria had been controlling them by the old mythical rules of staying out of the sun and such. They left their hideout and fellow coven mates with Fred after the illusion was gone. The others soon figured it out too. They were trying to figure out how to be real vampires on their own, after that, wandering for the past couple of years. They had been running through the forest when they were recruited as witnesses. They thought it might have been their destiny to end me after all when they saw me across the field, recognizing me from a picture that Victoria had given them that she had stolen from the school office when she was gathering information about me. However, as they heard the rest of the story, they were swayed to think differently. I was so happy they did.

We thanked our three heroes profusely for their help. Carlisle invited them to join us. He and Esme were drawn to them as they were quite young still and desiring direction. They were so young when they were turned, also. Bree hadn't yet turned sixteen. He offered them the choice of becoming family. They decided to stick around to find out if that was what they desired.

Before the others started to leave, the question was posed, "Who will lead us?" Eyes, both golden and red turned to Carlisle. He saw their gazes shift and in modesty was taken aback.

"Perhaps we should all think for a year and return here next year to decide how we wish to proceed. I have no desire to be a ruler like the Volturi. My family wish to live freely, as I am sure all of you do, as well. Maybe we could come up with a way to proceed in the future. We can think about taking turns being sure no one is being reckless. I don't believe that we need the same kind of leadership that we've had in the past. We do need something to prevent anyone from making newborn armies and such. For now let's follow Marcus' advice and only worry about exposure. If anyone cares to live like us, my family and Tanya's family would be happy to instruct you." Carlisle said.

Around the clearing there was nodding in agreement, but it seemed they were all locked in on Carlisle for some level of leadership. It would have pleased him should they all had decided to live like us. Edward had said the majority had begun to consider it. Seeing Charlie kill Caius and Aro had inspired a different reason for making such a decision. For the Cullens and Denali's it had been compassion. For these who had witnessed such an event, it was self preservation.

Many of our friends left after the smoke had cleared and the fight was over. Irina and the other Denali's left after she heartily apologized to us all. Garrett followed after Kate and it seemed she had found her mate. Another couple of male nomads followed closely after them hoping to find time with the other beauties. Others followed them to lessen the number who were "sitting at Carlisle's feet." They would return when his new disciples thinned out.

I looked for my father to see what explanation he might have for joining the fight against vampires. His only response was, "Sue said that the answer laid in my gut feelings of what to do. So, I followed my gut." Edward smiled broadly as he read more of his thoughts. There was more to the story, of course. He would get around to telling us about it all, eventually. At this point, he needed to be away from all the red eyes. The wolves took him back to Sue. I was sure that would be some reunion.

Edward and I embraced after looking across the field. Renesmee had climbed on Jacob's back. He sauntered over to us and nuzzled the back of my head. We let the two of them join us in our hug. Relief had replaced all the negativity that had been resting in our subconscious. All would go well for our little family. I had firmly added Jacob into my picture of what our family was. I believed Edward had as well as his arm reached around the great wolf's neck.

-2-2-2-2-2

 _ **A/N: So there's really just one chapter left. I actually started playing around with the idea of this story about a year ago. The first date on my notes was Jan 23, 2015. I can't believe I'm almost finish. It's amazing how the story took a life of its own. I have a couple other ideas in the work. One is pretty ridiculous, but I think I will post it for entertainment's sake. Of course I'm still planning to post the super secret POV outtake from this story. I hope you will find time to read it. Thanks so much for your time.**_

 _ **JaelSarjenka**_


	19. Chapter 19 after

After

After we all returned to the main house, we all gathered around the great room discussing the day. Edward, Jacob, Renesmee, and I were together on the couch. Leah, William, Seth, and Annie were in their own circle next to us. Carlisle and Esme were getting acquainted with Bree, Diego, and Fred on the other side of the room while Alice and Jasper listened with interest. There were others in clusters around the room including the silent but very pleased Romanians. Rosalie and Emmett had just excused themselves to go to their room to express their delight that each other was still alive.

As conversations went on as they do, Edward was called upon to give his account of what happened accounting for thoughts.

"It was very loud." He started and nearly everyone rolled their eyes in the manner he liked to do to the rest of us. " When Aro entered the clearing he was extremely pleased to see that both Alice and I were there. He had heard of our gifts and was certain of acquiring us for his collection. He was amazed to see the girls and thought they would be interesting to keep on display so he could watch them grow and learn daily. When he saw the wolves, he was taken aback momentarily but thought they would be handy around as guard dogs."

Jacob snorted at this, "Who would want a guard dog who solely wants to destroy you?"

"He was counting on Chelsea to bind your loyalties to him."

"My loyalties? Really?"

"He couldn't help but note your relationship with Renesmee when she showed him her thoughts. He knew he couldn't have her with out you."Edward explained.

"I wonder if she could have bound me to him or if the magic that causes me to shift when vampires are near would override it?" Jacob pondered.

"I guess we will never know since Benji toasted the bird." Emmett and Rosalie had returned in time for him to interject.

"Fine by me." Jake was smiling at his friends.

"When Renesmee asked Aro about his intentions, he was prepared to reassure her that he would never harm her loved ones." William added to the story. He had seen what the lie would have been.

"You should have heard his thoughts as he couldn't stop telling the truth. He was trying to figure out what the compelling feeling was and was fighting for control." Edward laughed as he recounted. "He was upset for setting himself up for this. There were so many vampires whose talents he didn't know. It was a rookie move, really. He was driven by his desire for acquisition and his security knowing his talented guards were surrounding him. He didn't know to factor in Bella's shield, Benjamin's elemental control, or Annie's truth gaze. Had he had Alice's gift already on his side, he might have foreseen that he should sit this one out."

Jasper joined in the story, "Caius was furious and Aro's emotions were all over the place. He certainly had the feeling of utter regret before he was pulled into the staring contest with Caius. Then they were both filled with utter hatred for each other, but I might have helped with that."

"Once Aro had given his confession, thoughts were still reined in as Chelsea kept her binding power wrapped around them all. Then after Benjamin plunged her into the earth's core thoughts were a jumbled mess. It didn't take them long to decide to get away from Aro. Disbelief was the underlying tenor between Caius and Aro as their guards left them. Renata's stepping away confused Aro most. He thought she truly loved him. He didn't remember she was only keeping him safe due to Chelsea's binding." Edward added.

Renata was standing to the side staring out the window through this and turned around taking a second to glance and smile at Fred. "I had protected him for a long time. I suppose a person could make himself believe that after while the feelings must be real. Sulpician was likely duped into being ok with Aro having me as a mistress along with a few others. I'm kind of sickened at the thought now. It's was actually more of a rape, since it was only under the influence of Chelsea's power that I submitted to him, the fiend. I'm glad he's gone, otherwise I would have to sully myself further by dismembering him before lighting him afire."

Fred had moved to her side to take her hand. "I'm very sorry you had to endure such things. Please stay and I will try my hardest to help you move past what was done to you. I would like very much to at least be your friend."

Renata smiled and looked down at her feet shyly, "I would like that, too, if it's not too much an imposition." She looked to Carlisle and Esme for affirmation.

Esme was the first to respond, "Of course, you may stay. We would be happy to have you." She was the picture of hospitality and nurture with the joyous light of caring for all this company in her eyes. She was clearly in her element.

It was quiet for a moment before Edward picked up where he left off, "I heard the wolves that carried Charlie first. They were astounded that they had gotten that far. Their plan could have gone awry before that point, as it was tricky magic they were working with. Then I heard Charlie's thoughts as he prepared to take aim. He couldn't believe that the two he figure were his targets were so preoccupied. He thanked God and whatever powers that had gotten him that far and let go with a prayer, twice. They didn't understand what was happening at first. The pain from the fire was so distant before taking in their existence. They were so flammable and it was happening so fast." He shuddered revealing how much of their agony he had experienced and continued, "I missed what Felix and Demetri were up to due to my preoccupation with all the other activities around me. I heard one think 'That was easy' and then I saw them behind me. But then I heard the plan that Fred had come up with and I felt quite at ease that they would be successful, which was quite of of character for myself. Then I realized that Alice's power had grown at the beginning of the confrontation when everything that was at stake came to her. She realized that she would lose loved ones and that the entire tribe would be at risk. Her sight expanded to include the wolves and hybrids when she thought of what could happen to our extended family. She had most secretly explained what would happen to Jasper and he was calming me. She saw that if I interfered, it would have tipped off Felix and Demetri and they would have gotten away with the girls, leaving Bella a crushed lavender smoking heap of ashes." His voice was filled with emotion.

He caught Alice and Jasper's eyes and added a hearty, "Thank you so much."

Alice was feeling self conscious, "You forgot about how Bella thwarted Jane's plan to torture the lot of us."

Edward laughed, "Furious is too light a word to describe Jane's anger. She lost her ability to think for a moment. The first thing that came to her mind was that Irina was the one who had brought the charge that led her to her moment of humiliation. That's why she turned on her next. She was utterly destroyed emotionally before Zafrina blinded her and the wolves ripped her to shreds. She was trying to think of any way to get to Bella and kill her. No one had ever defied her in such a manner."

"Another thing to note," he went on, "is that Irina realized that Laurent wasn't her mate. The feeling of loss that she had for him disappeared altogether when she saw her coven standing with the wolves, the girls, and our coven. She was ashamed of herself, to say the least."

I steeled myself to ask, "Who's idea was it that Felix and Demetri should go after us?" I wasn't really sure I wanted to know, but I had to ask.

Edward frowned, "It was sort of Caius' plan. He had told them to take Annie and kill her if something unforeseen were to happen. They added Renesmee to their plan and then you, Bella. They were just planning on forcing themselves on you and killing you before they killed the girls. They both were horribly villainous and had heinous thoughts about all the females in our company. Years of condoned savagery had warped their minds. They were truly monsters. Diego improved the world by ending them."

Diego smiled brightly before saying, "I am honored to be among so many heroes today. I am glad I had the chance to help."

After the evening of processing the day was over, Edward and I carried a sleepy Renesmee to our cottage. Jake had left to check on things at La Push and sleep in his own bed on the reservation instead of on Renesmee's floor by her bed in wolf form.

"Will things ever be normal for us?" I wondered aloud.

"It depends on your definition of normal." Edward teased, but seemed to turn serious. "If you mean to inquire as to if it will be boring and easy going from here on out? I doubt it. We are in a hotbed of supernatural happenings and beings. There's no way that would happen for us. But I do hope to take you away from it all for spans of time." He looked deeply into my eyes and I was dazzled by him as usual. "I hope to take you back to Isle Esme after Renesmee is grown. Before then, we will find a way to go on a family vacation and visit anyplace you desire. Renesmee should be able to see the world and expand her horizons."

"If you're asking if we might have part in whatever vampire rules that Carlisle and the othe coven leaders decide on, I would like to decline for now. Our relationship is too new and I think we both are disinclined to miss any of Renesmee's short childhood."

He seemed inclined to talk forever so I decided to interupt, "How about we not worry anymore about what normal and find time to be a little freaky." He laughed at this. We snuggled into our bed and forgot ourselves in each other for the rest of the evening. That would be our new normal forever, as far as I was concerned.

After a year had passed, the level headed coven leaders came together to discuss how to help each other. Some of the southern vampires had begun to war again like they had during the Civil War era and were in danger of exposing us. Jasper was tasked with assembling a disciplinary team since he had experience with these groups. They were subdued and the threat was over. It wasn't easy, but the gifts that Jasper's teams employed did cause a peaceful end in most cases. They did have to destroy a few leaders. Usually the followers were uneducated on broader vampire life and what we would come to call ettiquette.

The world coven leaders decided to form a loose coalition to keep the secret as Marcus advised. When a large problem would come about, they would join together and take care of it. No one ruled over the others. But they all looked to Carlisle for guidance since he seemed to be wise. He didn't like this to be pointed out because he was modest and humble.

It was amazing to see how many changed their diet over that year. Not everyone had made that decision, it wasn't an easy change to make. Many hadn't ever thought about it before. Vampires drink human blood was their premise from before they were even turned. Another choice would have helped many transition to immortality more smoothly. Many had a distaste for cruelty. It was those who were already mentally unstable previously to being changed that would not accept any change to their lifestyle.

Marcus had found love again. Maggie of an Irish coven had won him over when her coven came through after spending time learning to be vegetarians in Denali. They became all but inseparable after a few days. Edward had said that Marcus had wondered if Didyme had been reincarnated. I wondered if it wasn't true. Who knew?

Leah and William had another child, a boy. They named him Harlan after a friend of William's youth. He was just as amazing as his sister.

The wolves continued to guard LaPush. Those who did not turn were encouraged to find helping careers. Law enforcement, medical, and mental health careers were on the top of the list.

Edward and I quarreled often as we were both independent stubborn thinkers. We practiced making up often. We appreciated our differences and chose to continue to love each other daily. We learned the nature of true love is to accept the other for who he or she is and to help the other excel in that way.

We have lived in every location known to man, preferring the darkest parts, of course. But in sunny places we enjoyed the nights. I had convinced him that the night sky was lovely and best appreciated cloudlessly. He had come to understand that I am right more often than not. He could trust me.

Trust. That is something we had built together. I remembered thinking at one point that I wouldn't be able to trust him again after he left, but it was there. It was beautiful. It just took time and understanding. We did heal from the time we missed while separated. The gifts that were given to me through that time, getting to spend time with my mortal friends and family was definitely worth the sorrow and pain, but there had been damage done. I have never regretted that I didn't give up. I am pleased to be able to say that I succeeded because I tried.


End file.
